The Frankel File

Episode 9: Bravotv.com's Editor calls "her girl Gloria" to dicuss the return of Gina and this episodes agita-a-go-go.

Apr 16, 20120

Yes finally! The return of Gina. The world's sassiest baby nurse come back to us (albeit too briefly) and Cookie learned a new trick (shockingly). Let's assess this pre-vacation episode.

Apartment Agita
We open with the lovely Girl Gomez dropping by Bethenny's to discuss the continuing design process. Bethenny has decided that Brooke's greatest talent is  spending other people's money. Last I checked, that's the fun of being a decorator. You get unbridled access (within a budget) to a stockpile of cash that you can spend on pretty things. She knows by now how to drop some bank on a bench! But, since it's Team Bethenny, the decisions are a group effort, meaning Julie is called into give final say. Julie then reveals to Brooke that she won't be able to do that for much longer. Brooke's face when she realized Julie was leaving was really just incredible. Agita personified.

Besides benches, Bethenny's got to pick out marble for her bathroom. As usual, she must act as center for the entire situation, with the boys not talking to the Gomez Gals. Thankfully on the way out of the stone store, there’s a large statue of some sort of skirt wearing deity, so Bethenny can lean on that religious figures aide. Marc doubts her Egyptian religious leanings, but you know what? He can deal with the buildings. Let her handle the moral needs surrounding the design. If it's going to take Bethenny jotting down notes in hieroglyphics to get this apartment finished, so be it. Why not just put a sphinx statue in the living room and call it a day.

Beam Me Up
Here's a question -- when does a "golden glow" get a little too golden if you know what I mean?

As further proof that Bethenny’s life is the best, she has a very important drinking meeting. Just a midday summit to to test out the latest Skinnygirl cocktails, assess the cheater brands, and ponders what the sangria's color reminds people of. Apparently, it's a fine line between gasoline, urine, and delicious, refreshing cocktail. Never forget.

27 comments
SLfanfromCA
SLfanfromCA

I think the talk show is too soon. I would rather see Bethany try to work on the marriage and get off of TV altogether until she and Jason determine what is happening in their lives. I enjoy seeing her show, but something is not right here. Her husband seems resentful about something. Not sure what it is as his wife just made them both very rich. Jason wants to spend time with his parents but puts a guilt trip on her because she is just not in that same space. In marriage there is give and take. So I would dump the show for now and reality TV to get the family back in gear. I would insist that Jason have family therapy and that he at least try to make this marriage work. Otherwise this relationship is not going to last unless he stops the bad behavior. Julie got out of this, Gina got out, who is the next one to leave. Once all of your close friends leave then what? I was surprised at the things Jason was saying and just how cold he really is.

harleygirl1
harleygirl1

Bethenny needs to take it one day at a time, and not rush through life. My parents just celebrated 60 years together, raised 9 children and have 26 or more grandchildren and many great grandchildren. I wish I can say they were all peaches and cream, but not! They have had their ups and downs, and been thru a lot of challenges in those years, loosing 2 of their children, and not my mother who suffered a bad stroke 4 years ago, paralized one the left side, and is in a wheel chair, and can not do much on her own, she is nearly 78 and my dad 84, but he takes care of her every day and does a great job although not well himself, he feels he is the best person to care for her, now that is love. So Bethenny, lighten up and live your life, and do not think anyone is perfect, your setting yourself up for failure. You have a child now with Jason. Fix what is wrong and work thru this together, give Jason a chance to be fully a part of your life. No one can guarantee you anything in life. Don't pass along your insecurities to your child. Allow Jason's parents to be part of your life, You and Jason should of gone away just the two of you, and grandma and grandpa should of taken your daughter for a week, embrace the new family you have in your life. Your life is running like you talk, FAST. Again, One day at a time!!!! Stop letting your WHOLE life play out on TV. Leave the intimate part behind closed doors, you can see Jason is not totally comfortable with your outbursts about that, chill girl. !!! Step back and see what it would be if it were your husband doing the talk about your personal business....... Just staying>

ladyhawk
ladyhawk

His telling you that you are damaged is very destructive and he has to realize that. He does it on purpose to get to you and it works! He's the one that needs therapy!

TERRY FISH
TERRY FISH

Hi Bethany,I think you are so wonderful!!! You are so Beautiful and so smart!!! You have accomplished So much with your life.You have a wonderful husband and child.Please stop torturing yourself.We know how close you were to Julie,but you will be fine with your new assistant.You have too much going on at the same time.Try to relax and not be so perfect.Once your home is completed life will get better with each passing day.I wish you were related to me(like my niece or daughter.I would help you and praise you for what you have accomplished with your life.Please try not to put so much pressure on yourself.Be Healthy and Happy with your life.Things will get better don't worry. Take one day at a time. Fondly, Terry

DianeD
DianeD

After this last episdode, I agree with a previous post. Bethany is tortured. I am not saying that Jason is perfect but she cannot put the blame on him for things she cannot even resolved within herself. Why invite him to a conversation if you already have determined, the outcome? It is so sad. My Mother always said, you can have it all..just not all at the same time. I hope they don't make anymore shows and can work together as a family. I pray, I also agree with a previous comment, she needs a new therapist. A calm person does not make a good therapist. I don't think he is bad either, but many people need to move on to a new therapist. It can be healthy if the process is transitioned properly.

Yello
Yello

Your therapist is not right for you. Sorry to be the one to tell you. You need a cognitive-behavioral therapist that will challenge your irrational thoughts. You have a psychoanalyst who forces you to focus on the past. It's not helping you at all. You are not coming to peace with your past, so accept it and focus on the here and now.

Abby Kupper
Abby Kupper

I have never felt compelled to post anything before but need to give you my 2 cents. I worked in a correctional facility for 15 yrs and have seen women with issues you would not dream about. What I learned is pretty basic, you can work on your issues but at some point you have to get the hell over it and move forward. Everybody has garbage in their past but the silver lining is that it makes us the people we are now. You are a strong, smart, beautiful person and Jason is a lucky man. Because you have allowed us a look into your world, everyone becomes an armchair quarterback. In your heart of hearts you know what you need to do to make your home a peaceful one. I admire you so much for sharing, warts and all.

Lisa Levine
Lisa Levine

my thoughts are that bethenny, jason and bryn need time together. Why can't she have a real office, outside of the home that is..., where she can separate corporate world from home life, afterall, she does have the nanny. If she gets a cleaning person, she will be all set, assistant, driver, nanny, cleaning person, then she can concentrate on work and family. Although, Julie is leaving, maybe just a girls retreat would have been the best. Bethenny also confides into her staff about personal issues with Jason. Her thereapist is fantastic and keeps her grounded, she should refrain from sharing her thoughts with staff and try to keep it as professional as possible, work is work and it can be fun and rewarding, but family is sacred. Although I love the show, I mostly care about Bethenny's well being, I look forward for her talk show... It will be great. Good luck with everything, I am routing for your success in your career but mostly with Jason and your family.

Monika1
Monika1

I think Bethenny has to pull back on the entourage. They really need to spend some time without all her stuf. It is never good for a marriage. Jason is right. I almost feel like she rather spend time with other people than her own family. She has to put some more effort in that. Money is not everything is almost destroy everything. If I know that my marriage is in trouble I would try to avoid getting a vacation with my entourage. Obviously they need to spend some time together. It is hard when you have not much to talk about with your spouse. They made a mistake from the beggining. Too many people in their life.

katcart
katcart

To continue my post which was cut off...... Bethenny, Jason is not perfect - none of us is - but you make it easy for him to put the blame on you because you blame yourself. Your mother is wrong about all of the things she has recently said in the media about your relationship with Jason. She doesn't even know you. How could she? You need to rise above her and your past emotionally, see ALL you really are and, most importantly, learn to love yourself. I think then you and Jason can move forward and find peace with each other, and you will find it much less "uncomfortable" to let Jason's family into your heart too. I know it's hard Bethenny. Been there, done that, but 34 years later we are at peace. So, stop beating yourself up and love yourself for who you are. Your viewers do.

katcart
katcart

I disagree with the viewer who said Bethenny doesn't love Jason. If she didn't, it wouldn't hurt so much. Bethenny, I grew up with a not so perfect life and was on my own at a young age (15), much like you were. I met my husband thirty four years ago, a man like Jason from a well-rounded All-American family. The differences in our families caused a lot of stress in our first couple of years of marriage, and we went through the same things you and Jason are going through now. I think things began to change when I stopped beating myself up so much for the things I had no control over, and instead started to love myself for who I was, which in turn made me less vulnerable to those feelings of inadequacy that made me uncomfortable around my "perfect" husband and his "perfect" family. instead of back at

gwen 44
gwen 44

Hi Betheny, I have been watching you since you were on NY housewives. You are doing a wonderful job for yourself and family. I think when you are attaining fame, so many things and people change. It is almost like, they don't want you to make it. I bet you think that, I didn't have problems like this before I became famous. I don't know what it is, but the devil is very busy. You have to be strong and tough, and take the good with the bad. It all will come to past. Hang in there, enjoy your daughter, enjoy the life you created and ignore the negativity. You can't please everyone, even your husband, all the time. So, find out what makes YOU happy. May God continue to bless you and your family.

su hb
su hb

I think Bethenny needs to watch the season of RHONY where she "fell in love", and then watch the first Bethenny Getting Married season. Watch how you treated each other. Watch how you called him "baby". You were so sweet and in love. You are a tortured person. You are lovely and so driven, but you seem to thrive on finding things imperfect. Maybe Jason is the perfect man for you and maybe he isn't, but he is your daughter's daddy so it can't hurt to try and make it work. Being in love ain't easy. No one is in bliss every day. It is impossible. It is possible to enjoy the fruits of your labor, laugh hard, play hard, and realize that your time here is short. Make the most of it. You will not be on your death bed wishing you had worked harder or smarter. You will wish you had put more into your daily life and relationships. Making happy memories is what is important. Jason does seem like a good man and you seem like a good woman. What a beautiful family! How many people would do anything to have what you have? Appreciate it. Don't take it for granite. Life is too short!

Yin
Yin

don't feel guilty to receive love! you have a lot to be thankful for! Jason is not perfect , he never will, he's just human! you are not perfect, you never will, you are just human! just let love be and be humble and thankful! your family is worth it!

OutofControl
OutofControl

Well, my prospective is totally opposite of "viewer". As smart as Bethenny is, she should get it by now (thru ALL the therapy) that she is not damaged - her parents are. Has she not had plenty of success, raves, attention, and $$, to know she is not damaged. I understand angry, confused, sad - her poor therapist - he hasn't gotten thru to her yet that damaged she is not. She has so much going for her and she knows it. She is an extremely confident women. If she would let them in, her in-laws would love to be "parents" to her. She is really very mean to them - at least on the show. She has so many people in her life that love her - if she were "damaged" she wouldn't. I am so tired of that word coming from her. Boo-hoo! Most of us come from unhappy childhoods. Time to move on like the rest of us! At least she is rich. Bethenny is self-centered and not in-love with Jason. I really don't think she could ever be married for long to anyone. She rants and raves way too much. It is always about her. Never shuts up - she wears me out. Not courteous with most people. Horrid language. I think Jason is way too patient with her and way too nice. She got what she really wanted from him - a child. OK, bye now Jason. She hasn't been married long enough to know it is give and take - not all take. What has she done for him and his business and friends. And we hear all about how cruel Jason treats poor Bethenny - but never get jason's side of the story. i would bet he does not constantly blame everything on her because she is damaged. She is always telling him he is the perfect one and he gets his fill of that. We have seen that on the show - so him trying to manipulate and undermine her - no way. She is not the kind of person that would let anyone "beat her down" She is NOT weak and has no trouble standing up to anyone. She does not love Jason - simple as that, but has a child. Makes divorce so much more difficult now. That is why she cries all the time - her life is not quite perfect yet, just almost!

Missy unsure
Missy unsure

I love that Bethany has become successful but it came at the wrong time in a young marriage. Jason I do not understand why you treat and belittle Bethany so much. Is it your motive to drive her to suicide and then take her money and baby? If not then man up and treat her the same way before she made so much money. I think you are embarrassed because she makes more than you do. Jason grow up or go home to your mom and dad.

karenmom
karenmom

Bethenny- DO NOT LISTEN TO THE "VIEWER" ABOVE MY POST!!!! You love Jason. He loves you. Love between you is not the problem. "Viewer's" problems were hers alone and not yours. I think your therapist is great. Stick with him. You are going to get through this a whole, healthy person. Putting your past behind you is the problem. But let's face it, you've worked on this long enough and it's time for you to put a stop to this. The past is past. Let it go. You CAN wake up one day and say "I'm done with this. I am no longer a victim of the people in my past. They are gone. I am married to a great guy. I have a beautiful child. I have a family that loves me and supports me. I have good friends. I am financially secure. I am going to be a happy person." Good luck, girl. Lots of love, Cheryl

Rosemarie HK
Rosemarie HK

I was terrible moved and impressed by the honesty and courage displayed in last night's episode. I don't recall every seen a reality show with that much "reality" and honesty which came from you, Betheney. I applaud your total vulnerability, courage and honesty to share your innermost insecurities and fears. Not many can or are willing to do so.. So much of what you said hit so close to home for me... The same, "you are damaged"; "there is something wrong with you"; spoken by a previous husband reminded me all too painfully what a hurtful relationship can bring. I have the highest admiration for you and wish you much happiness and peace.

Cali Viewer
Cali Viewer

All I can say is the Dr. Amador is really the best therapist I have ever seen in real life or TV. He is very calming and gets right to the heart of the matter. She is lucky to have him. The viewer that says Bethenny does not love Jason made me laugh. She only wanted to talk about her own junk. Leave it to the professionals sweetie.

Bethenny is no more damaged than most of us. We all have issues.

MaggieMaye
MaggieMaye

first off..the first yr of marriage is rough, I don't care what anyone says..second year, you add a child? even rougher..Then add all you have going??? know wonder your so stressed, honey...

Yes, Jason comes from a very loving home..has awesome parents, and seems very grounded...Because he did and is, does not make you the damaged one...I think that has to be said, and taken out of the equasion, asap! It isn't helping things or changing anything...Only thing it is doing, is giving you a complex...

I think any parent would be very proud of you ( I know I would be, I have 4 grown children, that are wonderful) and all you have accomplished, and I am not meaning monitary accomplishments...I am meaning you being a loving mommy, a wonderful wife, whom is honest with her feelings and wants her marriage to work out....Look at all the friends you have, friends that have been around you, for years! that means something!! I hope everything works out for you and your family..

I have never written on this type of forum, but you make ppl care...Good Luck!

Blues Mama
Blues Mama

WOW Viewer you said it beautifully! After seeing the show last night I have been tormented by all the sadness! I don't really believe Jason came from a totally stable home afterall! Brian's death caused heartache and sadness beyond anything a family should go through. All his talk of Bethanny being damaged is bullshit! Any man who treats his wife like that and says those things to her when she is down and hurting is DAMAGED himself! He was with her long enough to know how she is before they married so I'm calling this abuse Jason! Get yourself to a marriage councilor one you both can relate to! If you don't we will all know why you were still single at 40 something. Because you say mean things to your woman, like you do with your male friends! Women are hormonal beings especially when they have had a baby or are pregnant! We get very tender hearted about many things, you need to get that or get yourself a man to say hurtful things to! Bethanny you are married now, no man wants his wife joking with another man about his dick! You have fun girlfriends save your crazy talk for girls night out/ weekend! Both need to work on this if you want to be in a loving connected long term relationship of any kind! Jason you will ruin the relationship with Bryn as well with the way you talk to women. And just wait bud when she gets old enough she will bring you to your knees with the way she learned to relate to men because of the way you treated her and Bethanny! No one is perfect. Every relationship has challenges! In order to keep them healthy both will need to keep working at it! Talk it out, but shout no names! Alone time is vital! You two need to put one another FIRST for a change! How do I know this? Still in love after 35 years and counting....

greshgirl
greshgirl

Sadly, Bettheny just seems to be a tortured soul.

justme5
justme5

Poor Bethenny. Honey you have got to put your past behind you and move forward. If you keep telling Jason that you are damaged, and taking that as the blame for all your problems, what incentive will he have to say no some of it is my fault too?? He fell in love with you for who you are, so let him love you for who you are.

linda
linda

You really need to get some new thoughts before your husband runs for the hills!

HugeBfan
HugeBfan

Hang in there B! Through every forest there is a valley. May your trip to Mexico be your much needed and well deserved, blissful valley!

Amanda Martin
Amanda Martin

I just wanted to comment to Bethenny that I really appreciated her filming her therapy session on tonight's episode. I appreciate it because it is almost word for word conversations me and my husband have had, and what I have said to him. It surprised me that Bethenny, who is so different from me, could be feeling almost exactly the same feelings that I am. We have only been married for two years but I am becoming more and more thankful for people sharing their stories about marriage and their challenges. It makes me feel like I am not the only one that is dealing with my problems. I haven't watched this season as much but I am very thankful that I happened upon it tonight. I hope that Bethenny can know that I am thankful to her for opening up about that.

Best Wishes,

Amanda

Viewer
Viewer

So painful to watch Bethenny go through the most exciting time in her life with no one to share it with. It's like watching someone reliving my life, to some extent. She's not in love with Jason. They are total opposites. She thinks it's because she's damaged. I want to jump through the screen and tell her. It's because you are Two different people. He's not better than you, he's different from you. You want to connect to him emotionally because he is so safe. He is from a stable family that you crave. You can't understand why you aren't connecting to a perfect person. It's because he's a good, decent man, that would be perfect for a Sunday school teacher, but not for you. You're not a bad person because he's not right for you. He's angry and criticizes you, and is passive aggressive toward you because he knows on an emotional level that you are not in love with him, so he undermines you in order to confuse you, because he knows you don't belong together. He will manipulate you by using your insecurities about your dysfunctional family history to make you think there's something wrong with you, instead of being honest with you, letting you know that he knows you aren't right for each other. He would rather do this to you than break up his daughters home. He comes from a background that thinks it's better to shove things under the rug, and look the other way. I ask you is he really perfect, or is he letting you torment yourself, by thinking you'll never be good enough, just so his needs can be met? I was married to a similar person.I was so beat down by the time I left, I literally felt like a criminal for not being in love with a perfect man. I fell in love with a man who's not perfect. We've been together for almost 26 yrs. It's not about whether one or the other of us is better than the other. We're perfect for each other, who knows maybe our flaws and not so spotless past is what makes us perfect for each other. I just know we're very happy. I'm never lonely when I'm with him. I never long to feel connected to another person, so you decide, is it because you're a damaged person, or is he just wrong for you.