The Frankel File

Episode 3: Bravotv.com's Associate Editor discusses boats, Bethenny, and Dwayne.

Mar 2, 2012

No Raccoon is Safe
I'm no zoologist, but I don't believe raccoons travel in packs. In my dealings with the night bandits (that's the biological name I believe), they were always operating solo, grazing on trash all by their lonesome. However, out in the wilds of upstate New York, they supposedly run in gangs, in Mighty Ducks like diamond-formation gangs. 

Unfortunately, that pack mentality doesn't pay when you're crossing the same road Jason Hoppy is barreling down. He. Will. Run. You. Down. He mow you over, until you're blubbering over your dead siblings/mother/father. Jackie would have stopped and helped, but I mean, it was a party. . .

On Love and Algebra
Bethenny decides to her matchmaker streak outside of the morning television host realm, and fix up her business partner, Matt. I want to go on record as saying: Seriously, how much help does this gent need? He's a handsome, handsome fellow, who is employed (better than I can say of most of my conquests). Hence  Bethenny could follow the simplest matchmaker equation in the world.

Hot + Hot = Hotter

It's the 1 + 1 of the love (even simpler than that faux boy band jam "You + Me = Us"). And, so of course it worked. It was a full on foursome before Bethenny even put her pirate hat on. And I totally respect Bethenny's need for the morning after gossip (and her date inner monologue). Inquiring minds want to know, Jason. C'mon!