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Low Spark and High Heels...In the Roach Coach

August 8, 2007

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Two questions screamed for answers after last night's challenge:

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1) If you're a Miami chef, how, how, HOW can you screw up a Cuban sandwich? More to the point: WHY would you?

This week, Howie -- who is perilously close to becoming Mr. Know-It-All -- seems to have been caught transfixed in the headlights of an oncoming snack wagon, and for reasons known only to his phrenologist, decided that the beloved Miami classic, the Cuban sandwich, is not good enough. Worse, after much experience (he says) working in Miami nightclubs, he came to the shocking conclusion that what drunken hordes of clubgoers really want, immediately after spilling off the dance floor, is his creative riff on a classic. Crustier bread! "Better" raw ingredients! An "homage" sandwich, roughly manhandled onto a griddle between unevenly heated sheet pans. No, Howie. No.

What anybody who's even been to a nightclub understands is that drunk people want hot, cheesy, greasy, and familiar food. They want it fast. And they don't want to be challenged to think. They're done thinking (at least until tomorrow, when they turn over in bed and see what they went home with). A cheap-ass deli ham, roast pork, cheese, and gherkin on the same bread everybody else uses -- properly mashed down flat -- and you would have had some happy customers. Post-nightclub customers are the dream of every late night diner and snack bar operator in that they are oblivious. Howie chose to rudely wake them up.

If this crowd was going to notice anything in the interlude between the ear shattering, molar-shaking thump of the dance floor and whatever ill-considered coupling or porcelain bowl worshiping lay in their near future, it's that there was something...wrong…and...different...about this thing they were being told was a Cuban sandwich.

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Comments

Aria wrote:

I've always adored anthony bordain, and these blogs are him at his best.

Keep it up!

Lisa wrote:

WIth blogs like yours, I think I look forward to reading about the show more than I like watching it! Thanks for keeping us laughing!

Shelley wrote:

Glad you have your own space here, Tony. Your observations are always spot on (and a delight to read, as are all your books).

I can deal with Howie's asshole-ness. What I can't abide is watching his sweat drip from the end of his nose into the entrees. Please tell me that that's not how most chefs are "seasoning" their food behind the kitchen doors. Eeeewww.

Juanita Payton wrote:

Love the comments from Anthony B., he always keeps it real. Someone needs to give Howie a reality check and let him know about karma.
Wimpy the whiner needed to leave this week, man was she getting annoying and I was never impressed with her cooking.
I also believe some people need to step it up and do something original.

eric76 wrote:

The longer Howie and his extraordinarily poor ability to act as a team member stays on the show, the more I question whether or not the name of the show, Top Chef, is at all appropriate.

Neel wrote:

Please keep this blogging thing regular...your humor and candor is sorely needed!

Cam Beck wrote:

I'm not a chef. Although I enjoy good comfort food and fine dining as much as the next guy, I'm not even much of a cook for my own home. But I do wonder, even after reading your very undoubtedly heartfelt explanation, why you are so critical of Rocco's decision to lend his name to the commercial effort that can allow guys like me to prepare decent food quickly.

I'm sure he's a great chef. He must be. Everyone is saying it. I don't travel in your circles, so I had never heard of him or his reality show. If you say it was horrible and he's apologizing for it, it must have been pretty bad.

Because I had never heard of him, his endorsement of the meals he's pitching meant absolutely nothing to me. That some people who are more gifted in the kitchen than I recognize him as a chef of some talent lends some weight to the fact that it may have been a shrewd financial and marketing move on his part, and that's a language I do speak.

To me, that's not selling out, that is expanding his audience. The only way it would, to me, be harmful to his reputation and "gravitas" is if the food he was pitching turned out to be mediocre or didn't otherwise live up to its promise.

I really do appreciate the companies out there who are able to make life easier on people who are neither inclined to do well in the kitchen without a whole lot of practice nor have the time to spend preparing meals by the recipe book. That is why my wife and I have patronized "Dream Dinners" and "Super Suppers" in the past. A meal like the ones Rocco pitches would certainly be considered, now that I know they exist (and I didn't, prior to last week's episode, so the product placement worked in my case).

I like eating good food, and if mass marketing and production make it more accessible to people like me, what do I care if people like you (or Rocco) endorse it?

I guess it's difficult for me to understand because I'm not a professional like you, but if Eric Clapton endorsed guitar strings, that wouldn't bother me in the least, either, as long they were good enough that he could credibly stand behind them.

Pete wrote:

Mr. Bourdain,

This is scaring me. Are you inside my head now? I thought the same things on Howie, on Sarah, on Rocco. Oy. Now I am really screwed.

zoeme wrote:

Telling it like it is... Mr. Bourdain, you are right on about Howie and Hung. Hung's in your face talent is blocking the pleasure and joy right out of cooking it seems... Howie, didn't learn from the last two seasons--the two winners were well liked and the other chefs wanted to help them win, participate and learn. Hm.. but where would we find the drama factor if these two were chopped? On another note, I learned about you on this show... What is your favorite comfort food? A little history to go with the dish would be much appreciated. Thank you in advance for your reply -_-.

Ruby wrote:

Ah, Chef Bourdain...a rare treat. I haven't been able to watch your show since the Norway - Reindeer episode .

With regard to Chef Rocco Dispirito, I think your criticism stems more from the purist in you.

On to Hung. I think (based on the very little that I've seen) that he's unpolished, bright and ambitious. Whether that's a good combination or not, I couldn't say, but I enjoy watching his approach. If he finds his heart...I think he'll be amazing. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed that he does soon.

It's a pleasure reading your take. Thank you.

Mrs. W. wrote:

All the contestants would up their games if Tony were sitting at judge's table every week. 'Cause clearly Tom has turned into a cupcake this season. What, too busy too tell it like it is? Go, Tony, go! The truth will set us all free. And what happened to the pancake batter-wrapped corndog idea? That's a drunkards dream if I ever did hear one...

Cyndi wrote:

How is it possible that Howie did not go home? Tonight's episode reminded me for the first time that this is not a competition, it is reality tv at its worst. I am left with the impression that Howie is only around because the producers imagine he brings some controversy that viewers will enjoy. Tonight was too far. It is obvious that he is a bully and a jerk that intimidates every person that he is teamed with. Every time the challenge calls for teamwork his team falls apart. What is so upsetting is that the judges know this and still keep him around. I leave tonights episode with no desire to see the next. Not so good for ratings I would think.

Andrew wrote:

You're awesome. That's all that needs to be said.

Andy B. wrote:

You are truly amazing Mr Bourdain. You are so cool!!!!!!!!!
Low Spark and High Heels in the roach coach- fabulous play of words, perfectly In tuned to this T.C. EPISODE and the band Traffic. My, My, My. Your writing style is so strong, gruff, and honestly magnificent. To paraphrase a genus - much thinking allows T.C. contestants to approach winning more: Quick fire and Elimination challenges, thus getting closer to the promise land. It amazes me what the heck Hung is thinking or not. Just think simple man. You can cook if you get your head out of your ASS. Same with Howie, or Joey, and others. With that the cream will rise to the Top- Very equal playing field among Tre, C.J., Brian, Dre, and maybe Casey. Not so for Hung, Howie, and Sarah.
I now understand your feelings about Rocco. You stated it well.
You Tony are terrific. A wonderful chef, an inspiring writer, a world traveler for a wonderful show teaching about world wide culture and it's cuisine. Now a Top Chef Judge and host blogger.
Anything else Anthony!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bAby_In_dA-hous!!! wrote:

I love you Anthony never leave us

sara nguyen wrote:

what women chefs work in stilletos?! give me some names? al least i looked good in mine...

-sara nguyen

Maria wrote:

Mr. Bourdain,

I find your blogs insightful, and extremely entertaining. If only life could be narrated by you like it is in your show "No reservations". Really enjoy reading your blog posts.
Hope to keep watching you for a long time.

Missy wrote:

First off I've recently become a huge fan of You Mr. B........I love U, your like the freakin Simon cowell of the food world! I think your right on the money here with these contestants, especially that idiot Howie. Now of course he has a hell of a lot more talent than I do but I'm really getting tired of looking at his face. Why can't he just suck it up and realize that part of being a good chef involves the way you represent yourself and the ability to be a team player. If he could only tone his not so warm charm down a little he could possibly make it all the way to the top. Hasn't he thought about whats going to happen if he actually did??? Nobody is going to want to be on his team in the last challenge..........

Jeannie, Trabuco Cyn, CA wrote:

OMG - Anthony; you always manage to keep me thoroughly entertained. Love your analogies, descriptive writing style and humor! Love your KC book and your TV Program. All the chefs are talented; I like Howie but he needs to soften it up a bit and start having some fun and not take himself so seriously.

Jeannie, Trabuco Cyn, CA wrote:

OMG - Anthony; you always manage to keep me thoroughly entertained. Love your analogies, descriptive writing style and humor! Love your KC book and your TV Program. All the chefs are talented; I like Howie but he needs to soften it up a bit and start having some fun and not take himself so seriously.

Alan G. wrote:

The whole crew didn't use its collective head tonight. They momentarily forgot they were in a competition designed to throw them curveballs.

In any case, they should've been more adaptable -- and ultimately, some were. When the plan changes or disappears, you can sulk or you can roll with it. Tonight's winners rolled, and even more incredibly, rolled together. Even Chef Ego, aka Hung, got into the team spirit. Talk about surprises.

The losers sulked, and one in particular. Poor Sara. Howie butting his bald head with her was no surprise, either. If it hadn't been Sara, it would've been someone else. His attitude, as much as Hung's, seems to be "I'm Howie...and you're not."

To which I could only say amen and thank God.

Am I wrong, or is the way you work with people as important as the way you work with ingredients? Howie needs to forget about being a top chef and go run a sidewalk stand somewhere. It's something he can do alone.

faustianbargain wrote:

i am not surprised that you are using as justification rocco's choice to not run a restaurant kitchen for your verbal garbage. afterall, you bashed charlie trotter because HE didnt want to cook foie gras in HIS kitchen..then you attacked woody harrelson for wanting to eat raw food in thailand..he wasnt force feeding anyone..it was just his personal choice..you have insulted entire groups of people..who make their eating choices on the basis of their traditions, health concerns, religion and personal point of view..why on earth should rocco or anyone else consider any of your empty and hollow words as sage advice?

take a moment and ask yourself...where do you get off? you insult people for their personal choices that have NOTHING to do with you..ask yourself..what the fuck is wrong with you?

i am glad you have health insurance now. get yourself a shrink.

Gopal Krishna wrote:

The elimination challenge was such BS. I felt nauseous and prepared to swear off Top Chef for life upon the realization that the contestants had been misled about their "night out". Top Chef is becoming My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss (Fox), or more accurately, a parody of itself. I don't watch the show to see people miserable and crying.

Unrelated, though also irritating, is how the reruns of Top Chef episodes are being re-edited. What's gone? Anthony Bourdain's invitation to Tre for late night yakitori and to get him "savage drunk", Clay's mentioning of his father's passing, Joey's tirade about one female contestant during a shopping scene, and probably more. Is this just to create more time for commercials or is something sinister going on? I am especially annoyed about the Bourdain cut, because it revealed a very charming aspect of his personality that made me want to find out more about him. Now I am a fan and watch his show on the Travel Channel religiously. Perhaps if I had not heard those words, I might not have taken an interest and would have been deprived of his cultural and culinary critiques.

What's going on Bravo? You also need to address judging mistakes that are made and aired on TV, not just on the web site. For instance, the whole lobster/cholesterol issue that was grossly blown out of proportion. Oh, and what about Micah's supposed South African roots? Born and raised in the US? (Source: Amuse-Biatch) Where's the due diligence?

Jason Koo wrote:

Chef Bourdain,
As a huge fan of yours, I'm sure you won't be insulted that I also think you are full of sh*t when it comes to Rocco. Yes, he is probably a snarky ass who deserved every bit of his comeuppance, but is he really that different from most brilliant chefs? Why does he get slammed for cashing in on his God-given talents? Do you really mean to say that all talented people have to suffer for their craft at tiny, cramped "temples" to the gastronomic gods? Your pal Tom Colicchio must have figured out some kind of time portal or rift in the space-time continuum to be able to simultaneously cook at all the varied outposts of Craft, Craftwich, CraftSteak, Craftymart, Craftdonalds, etc. When was the last time he actually cooked in one of his kitchens? For that matter, Mr. World-traveler, when was the last time you cooked? In fact, I don't think even Thomas Keller, at whose temple you prostrated yourself on like a little lap-dog, cooks anymore at his restaurants. Rocco happens to be young, talented, and good-looking (although not nearly as good as he thinks himself to be) and deserves every penny that companies want to throw at him to do his thing. Why? Because he can and no one else can. It is simple economics...he is worth whatever anyone wants to pay him. So while your are jetting off to Paris or London or Shanghai or Tokyo on glorified paid vacations courtesy of the Travel Channel NOT selling out, cut some others a break. It's a hard world out there and everyone deserves to make a buck. As far as the contestants are concerned, I was also surprised at the level of undisguised contempt they showed towards him...because competing on Top Chef is in no way a sellout, right? They "need" the exposure to be able to become chef at their own restaurant where they can practice the noble art of cooking. Except for the fact that most are executive chefs already. I am personally familiar with both Tre's and Casey's restaurtants. They are executive chefs at Abacus and Shinsei in Dallas, respectively, and they are both very well-regarded beautiful places (hardly 40 seat dumps). Well, I am sure I have already written past the attention spans of most of these readers, but I am just proposing that the term "sellout" be used a little more judiciously.

Cáitín wrote:

Cauliflower, CAULIFLOWER! I don't care that is was only a quick fire challenge Hung should have been sent packing for that unforgivable food sin.

Keith wrote:

I have to agree totally, Mr. Bourdain, with your assessment on the challenge for this week. Hung seems to have talent, but he gets over his head. I still give him credit for trying something different than more sweet stuff piled on ice cream, even if it bombed. Dale didn't make anything I couldn't already get at DQ.
Howie is a disaster, and considering the number of times he's been on the bottom, I am shocked he has the stones to even dream of himself as a leader of anything. He is only still on the show because other people have managed to screw up worse than him. Other people's one time mistakes are the only thing keeping him on TC. Clearly he isn't the chef he thinks he is.
Sara just gave up. Didn't want to be there anymore and had she at least made more than 3 burgers at a time, Howie would have been sent packing. My guess is she just didn't care anymore and committed hari kari just to get away from Howie.

ChefBert wrote:

Chef Tony,

Once again, I hate you!! Not only am I envious of your way with food, but I am jealous of your way with words. How can someone be such a genius with two wildly divergent arts as food and cooking is beyond me.

You have hit the nail on the head. The first thing a cook learns in Miami, is that you can not get away with fudging on a Cuban sandwich. If the bread isn't right you are going to hear about it. Howie should know better.

I found myself rooting for Howie early on, though I am not quite sure why. The further this competion goes on, the less likeable he becomes. Frankly, he would last about two days in my kitchen, and if he acted like that as a diswasher, he would be out the door before the first night. I have worked with many old-world French chefs who could be real 'buttwads,' but they had the saving grace of being right most of the time. Howie even when right has no saving graces.

I feel bad for Sara, she let herself drown in a sea of misery and failed to compete. The others on her team showed up, but thats it. How Casey and CJ could not see how things were backing up is beyond me. My thinking was that they were throwing 'someone over the roach-coach,' on this night.

As for Rocco, you were hard on him, but he needs a Godfather like you to slap him around a bit. He needs to see that the way things are going, he soon won't be able to shill for anyone, unless he has the cooking accolades to back it up.

Steve D. wrote:

Now there's an Elimination Challenge: You must feed 150 people in 30 minutes while wearing stiletto's. Oh yeah, Howie is your team leader. (Did somebody say Pay-Per-View?). Once again, Chef, laugh out loud funny and absolutely true.

julia wrote:

Your blog said it all. The show last night was terrific. Yes,Hung has a huge ego that gets him in trouble but I also notice that he gets along with the other Chefs.

Bruce wrote:

Well said...especially comments about Hung. He is his own worst enemy most times. Howie reminds me of the chefs I worked along side back in the day. Hard headed, always right, unapologetic when wrong. Nobody will go to the mat for this type, watch their back, nor look to please them. It becomes an adversarial relationship. Not good for the house and the customer will suffer in the long run.

Gina wrote:

Thanks Anthony,
Always love what you have to say, even if I dont always agree. I just wanted to comment on pointing out that balance is a key factor, talent/ego, how true. I am hoping that after the season is finished the contestants reread your writing, after the pressure is off, I hope they can take something away from it.
I am one of those vegetarians you often remark about, but when you stabbed the pig, my respect for you went way up.
Take chances, live boldly, you get it, I get you.
Respectfully,
Gina

LisaB wrote:

"Snarkologist?" OMG, I am so in love with you!

As usual, a spot on, (and absolutely hilarious,) review. I'm in awe of your writing skills AND your ability to zero in on people's characters.

You simply rule the universe!

Alexia wrote:

Now THIS is why I love reading Chef Bourdain's writing. Profane? Yup. Borderline abusive? Yup. Snarky as hell? Yup. Playing to the crowd? Maybe. BUT. When he writes as he wrote about Rocco in this blog it's thoughtful, informed and compelling. Well played Chef, well played indeed!

Sarit wrote:

Bravo! You hit every single important point of the episode. I love your sense of humor and writing style, thank you for blogging. Also, your footnote about Rocco shows your big heart, I admire you for being able to answer in that way.

steve wrote:

Love your writing Tony. You are so so right about Rocco, I mean yeah the limelight is a tempting mistress, but come on; Cook Me Some Food.

Jess wrote:

Great comments (again) Tony! Hung really is trying waayyy to hard to stand out. And Sara clearly let her emotions and (understandable) disappointment interfere with her goal of serving the customer.

About Howie: on the one hand, I agree he is not an ideal teammate, but on the other -- where are the balls on his teammates??!! If you know Howie is not only a bad seed, but also a potential train wreck on the food, why would let him dominate??!! Stand up to him, shut him up, and put him in the corner! If my competitive life hangs in the balance, there is NO WAY I would let him run me over. It's time for the Howie haters among the contestants to put up or shut up.

Howie survives because he intimidates his teammates into moping around so much that the judges are forced to say "Howie did his thing and it didn't work (again!), but it least he wasn't as bad as this other idiot." You want him gone? Take the reins out of his hands and let him fall when he implodes in the kitchen!!

Debi~ wrote:

Hello Mr. Bourdain~
You are a riot! I am thrilled that you have your own blog now along with everyone else. Some of the things you say are just hilarious! Like the "Magnificant, sweat-slicked, battering ram of a noggin" comment yesterday about Howie (who else could it have been about??)....that just hit it right on the...head! I love your show & watch it every chance I get and it's a pleasure to catch you on Top Chef whenever you are around. Keep on blogging and giving us your terrific insight on all things "food"!
Debi~*

Mike_Spain wrote:

Simply put this is ther best TC blog I have read. Its witty insightful, and opinionated without being self serving and condesending. I am now a fan.

Kat Watanabe wrote:

Anthony, you rock! Please be a guest judge again on Top Chef -- you're the BEST!! Very good points in your blog btw...but I'm surprised you didn't comment on the Sriracha ice cream topping -- yeah, the cauliflower was too much, but Sriracha?? Come on, everybody knows that once you've had Sambal, you can never go back to Sriracha :D

Karen wrote:

Thank you for commenting on the thing that attracts me to reality programming. It's not the competition between contestants that intrigues but the battle within the individual. Who will be able to get out of their own way to win - if not the competition, certainly in life.

Bilybob wrote:

Hi Tony,

Yours are the best blogs of all (sorry, everybody else).

The question I have is this: since all these episodes are in the can (so to speak in this digital age) months before they air, are you privy to the raw stuff before it gets edited and aired, or do you have to wait for the fateful airing on Wednesday nights like the rest of us? I understand that the regular judges see EVERYTHING except the background stuff way ahead of time and have to wait until after an episode is aired to comment/blog on it.

One other thing I have to comment on is Chef Tom. My opinion is that he's deferred to you lately because of some of the bad decisions he seems to have made in severql previous weeks. One of the worst ones was calling Brian out for cholesterol in lobster; bad form, really bad form. Aside from it's high cost, lobster is one of the healthiest foods most people can eat (yes, there are those that have an intolerance for shellfish).

I hope you make it to judges table more in the future and that you'll become a permanent blogger.

Billybob
BTW, my REAL name is William Robert

ben wrote:

so all the NYCrs are eliminated - I'm still surprised to have seen Lia go so quick, both Sara(h)s making it this far is quite surprising

Zack wrote:

Sara N. clearly lost the will to fight for what she believed in. She had to go, but I would have preferred Howie leaving, but that can't happen because it would be bad for the "drama".

Hung loses challenges because he is arrogant and cooks what he wants people to like instead of cooking what the people want to eat. Hung can make the food as complicated as he wants and if people don't want to eat it, he seems to blame the customer for it.

Howie is a leader, so wasn't General Custer. Howie does have leadership qualities. The problem is that he is unwilling to listen to other people and when the team he is on fails, as they always do with him as a leader, he blames other people. Howie will never give into anyone. He needs to take a look in the mirror and also take a step back and work with people instead of being a commander. He never will. If he ever did, then he probably would emotionally shut down and he would be of no use to the team.

Howie's team should have won, but no one wanted to confront Howie. At some point a confrontation is going to have to occur between any future team member and Howie. Unless Howie backs down and still stays motivated, his team will always lose.

Howie's team lacked energy. I don't know if it was because they were all on team Howie or because they expected to go out and party. For any of those people to honestly believe they were going to be able to explore the nightlife for the night was beyond ridiculous.

Howie's team could have saved themselves by having Casey leave her station and mingle with the guys until Sara got her act together and started cranking out the sliders. Of course they wouldn't have had the burger problem if they had Casey man the grill. I am sure they could have found something else for Sara to do. Sara was in no condition to mingle. Clearly, the team should have noticed that Sara was out of it and to put her at the grilling station made no sense. That team was lucky that Sara was sent home. It could have easily been any member of that team.

So far, teams have been rewarded for letting fellow struggling chefs twist in the wind. That can't last much longer. At some point a team leader has to go.

Pat wrote:

Dead on! It's a shame about Howie because I think he is really talented, but the thing that is going to do him in is the fact that he tries to lead by intimidation and when things don't go his way he washes his hands of the whole thing and makes everyone else responsible for the failure. If you want the authority, you have to take responsibility for EVERYTHING that happens. Howie was at his best during the Latin food challenge when he admitted that Joey had the best dish and gave him his bottle of wine. A little more introspection and generosity of spirit like that would benefit him greatly. He's so focused on winning that he's kicking his own ass.

Nadine wrote:

Mr Bourdain: That was a helluva blog. That was the best blog of all time ever. You are God. I shouldn't be telling you this. Your analysis slingshots right down to the ground and your heart is swell. But most of all, I will never forget Howie's phrenologist....

Art wrote:

Mr. Bourdain,

You've partially redeemed yourself by:

1) Ridiculing Howie's monstrosity of a Cuban Sandwich.

2) Pointing out that Brian is the only person to have demonstrated effective leadership skills. He's actually done so in 3 episodes.

3) Putting sentiment aside and admiting that both Saras are very weak and deserved/deserve to get axed.

David wrote:

Top Chef stands out as the kitchen/cooking/restaurant reality show that is, in fact, mostly about the food. But the product-placement pisses me off. Ok, those quickfires with Kraft, or Cold Stone, or whatever low rent product, that's fine - it's a few minutes of the show. But when eliminations are all about shilling for frozen food - that's antithetical to why I watch this show.

Howie's moved from a misunderstood talented bruiser to a jerk. It's been sort of depressing to watch.

Good to see you blogging. It's why I visit the website after the show now.

reeeeeen wrote:

Excellent blog, Lord Bourdain. I was all a-tingle to see you are becoming a regular blogger here. Excellent observations, I have yet to disagree with anything you've written. I am also enjoying the give/take with you and RD. You 2 should get a co-blog or column together.

Christine wrote:

Tony,

You have some wonderful insight into this whole process. I watch Top Chef because it is fun and entertaining. I think it has so much more credibility than so many other "reality programming" because the judging is done by real professionals. If this were a viewer vote in show, there would be no real reason to watch.

Howie is a pig. For a long time, I wanted Hung to be hanged (and he needs to go, too). But if I see Howie sweat into his food one one time, someone should alert the restaurant her works in.
I am looking foward to the competition settling down to CJ, Tre, Dale and Casey.

Jay Cadre wrote:

Anyone else surprised Howie didn't add some manner of pig product to his ice cream?

Pork is the new foam.

sully wrote:

AB is nail on the head as always. Admitting you are a snark and offering mea culpa in one paragraph. Such a gentleman.

Judyisapunk wrote:

Tony,
Great blog as usual. I have one bone to pick with you though. It was not fair for the women to go thru the elimination challenge in heels. I'm sure you know women who can cook for hours in stillettos but this is a competition. The Top Chef production staff should have had proper attire waiting for the cheftestants at the site. It's an unfair advantage for the men to be dressed comfortably while the women are made to shop and cook in bare armed blouses and high heels. It was not safe or fair. I work in a well appointed office and I can't seem to keep my heels on the whole day. I'm sure it's no picnic standing for hours on end over a stove in heels. Even the lovely Padma made reference to her dressing style being appropriate because she's not in the kitchen cooking. Well, why did they make the female chefs work under these conditions.
Keep blogging!

Melissa wrote:

I think you should replace Padma!!

Sean Robinson wrote:

Bravo must change up their editing practices. I knew from the first 5 minutes who was going home this week. The clips from "previously on Top Chef" highlight Sara and her slow cooking skills, then we have Dale mention how Sara is like her little sister and what good friends they are (the same fate happened to Lia) I knew she was history
Can we please kick Howie out! How many more bodies does he have to leave in his wake before the judges realize he is toxic. I don't care if he is the best chef in the galaxy, you can't bully people around that. I notice he especially treats women like S***. I thought Hung was supposed to be the bad guy, he's an angel compared to Howie

BarkNotBite wrote:

Oh Tony... as if I didn't love you enough already, you bust out the Simpsons reference and bring up Mr. Teeny.

Bravo, maestro!

Beccy wrote:

Mr. Bourdain, you are fantastic, sir, absolutely fantastic. No need to clarify your dead on analysis of Rocco, we all understood what you were saying and all appreciated that you said it with such candor. Moving on, I completely agree with your post on last night's episode. However, one thing that I was curious about, was how Brian's raw bar went over with the crowd. It was not especially clear on last night's episode and ultimately his team won, so there were few, if any, criticisms thrown their way. But, personally, the thought of eating oysters and ceviche after --- or before, for that matter --- a night of booze-fueled pumping and grinding makes me queasy. I cannot imagine such a dish being enjoyable on its first trip down my digestive system, let along the second time around on its way up. Ewww. I shudder to think of it.

All the Best,
Beccy

givemeabreakdance wrote:

Bourdain has seen women work 150 covers in stilettos? Fascinating. I'd love to know when and where and how frequently this happens. I'd also like to know if he perform similar feats with the grace and ease he expected from Sara.

Somehow I suspect that under different circumstances, he'd be the first to say that women cooking in stilettos are the reason they're not taken seriously in the kitchen.

karlsie wrote:

I'm glad to see you blogging - it always brings a smile to my face. Better yet was the Traffic reference (although your metaphor regarding Rocco might have been better served using Winwood instead of Clapton... don't you think?)

Keep serving it up, I look forward to your take.

becky wrote:

I thought sending sara home was really low. wearing high heels for that long is actually really painful and would have seriously slowed the women down in a way that the male judges didn't fully appreciate. Sara was punished for being honest about how she felt about the challenge. When she got emotional, the judges interpreted it as weakness, influenced by Howie's version of events.
But when Howie speaks personally, they take him seriously because he talks louder and is more aggressive. They blamed Sara for not speaking up about her ideas for fries etc., but not Howie for not listening at all. In a team competition, why should screaming until you get your way be valued over listening to your fellow teammates? Why is Howie allowed to blow up, but when Sara expresses her opinions, she's seen as weak?

Victoria wrote:

First, five females eliminated so far and only two males.
hmmmmm
Second, having the females cook in heels is at a total disadvantage. Sure, some female chefs you know can do it,
so what, but have these female chef's cooked in heels?
Are they comfortable cooking in "clubbing outfits".
hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Third, Howie should have left. End. What he did to that sandwich was ridiculous. He has proven so many times
that he is NOT a Top Chef. No one can or wants to work with him, imagine his kitchen. Maybe Top Chef producers like him because no one else does.
It seems that even this 'reality show' is
just like the rest.....all about show.

Natalie Sztern wrote:

When a man knows what Stilettos are that's very sexy....

cathy wrote:

sara should have gone her heart wasnt in it anymore and she was basically throwing a temper tantrum because she had to stay and cook casey was upset but not as much as sara was but i believe the person who should be going home is Hung his attitude to the judges is really bad when they say they dont like his stuff howie needs to quit being so mean i just cant believe hung is still there by the way good blog mr bourdain

GoddessLu wrote:

Tony, I appreciate the way you cut through all the blather and see what is really happening (even if you are watching it as a viewer, which I understand you do when not on the show). AFter reading Kitchen Confidential, it's clear that the excuses the girls on Howie's (oops, I mean CJ's ;-D) team made were a sack of crap. While I agree Sara was probably the right choice as she lacked conviction in her cooking (though not technical profiency, usually) I was struck by how lame CJ was in this process and when compared with Brian's rallying of his troops and his customer's, it was clear that a lack of leadership combined with whining about not being able to go clubbing that did them in. Casey's "I didn't see this coming at all" remark showed that she needs to pull her head out of her ass and play, heels and cleavage be damned!

Obi wan liberali wrote:

Tony, good observations on the challenge. For those who have read the book, "The Color Code", Howie comes off as an out of control red. In order to be a leader, the people you lead must believe that you have their back. There is no reason why anyone on Howie's team would believe that. Howie, despite his skill with pork, is too pig-headed to see beyond what is best for Howie. At the end of the show, Ifound it telling that Howie sat all by himself. He had alienated everyone from both teams. That isn't leadership, that is a despot waiting to be sent packing by his country into exile.

By the way, I would like to see if Howie can cook anything other than pork, or Brian cook anything other than seafood. I also find it interesting that the other Sara is still in contention. She hasn't been in contention at all for winning any elimination challenge that wasn't a team challenge.

Sara N. was obviously out of her league and her run was a good one under the circumstances. I hope this was a learning experience for her.

Again Tony, thanks for your insights.

damez wrote:

BEST BLOG EVER!! And yes, I want to scream that out.

Jennifer wrote:

Oh Anthony, all your words just spill deliciously from your soul. I adore the way you write and the way you care about the craft and culture of food. I watch your show all the time. I am even more addicted to Top Chef. I wish Rocco would listen to what you are really saying: if what you do really comes from your heart and soul, only goods things will follow. So Rocco - follow your cooking instincts! Stop chasing the glow of lady fame! Start feeding us your creativity and talent through your passion in a kitchen. And fame will folow. Leave television to the more twisted, talented, and handsome Anthony Bourdain.

lynn wrote:

So correct--My MCDonald's didn't net 3 mill on sober people coming through that drive thru. And, I could understand why Sara was pissed. It's dangerous to work in a kitchen in street shoes, let alone high heels!!! Besides trashing your clothes with grease. The set up didn't faze the men but it was stupid as far as the women were concerned. She went out with dignity
Hung was able to stay because of his onion rings? When the chicken was crap, again. Send him our way..we'll teach him how to cook chicken. Just don't send me Howie...my crew would kill him.

gary e. wrote:

Tony; We all look to the heavens to see what the food god has to offer in the words of wisdom, and you once again gave us the meaning of CHEF. I cannot see how Howie the {the sweat hog} and Hung the (racing demon) has made it this far, after last nite,s show I had to mellow out with avery strong shot of Gin over ice. I try not to miss your show NO RESERVATIONS as you bring so much to the world of food, as always a great blog,

mary wrote:

I find Hung a fascinating character. He is a talented che but an overachiever who wants sooooooooo hard to win that he overthinks issues. You can see how hard he tries to please by watching his body language. I feel sorry for him because he puts too much pressure on himself. He loses sight of the goal...pleasing the customer....and thnks about irrelevant issues. His overzealous behavior in the kitchen, his showoffy speed, the way he overlooked the fish that dropped on the floor, are all examples of his competitiveness and disjointed spirit. I wish he would just relax, develop a bit of a sense of humor, and appreciate his talents, and be himself. He is trying too hard.

Steve wrote:


Spot on blog comments!! Although I would have booted Hung last week and Howie this week. Someone should have mentioned to Sara she needed to make more sliders. Her back was to the customers. Still, she did under-perform. I really hope Hung and Howie go soon.

Joanie wrote:

Tony:
Exactly! You are alway dead on right on all points.

It really will be a shame if Hung can't get with the idea that a chef's job is to surprise and delight his patrons, not try to jam unappetizing and shocking (a negative here) creations of an ego gone wild down our throats. I still have nightmares about Marcel's avocado and bacon ice cream. For all of his obvious knowledge and talent, without a clear understanding of his market, us, not him, then he's a goner. What a waste of great talent and technical ability that will be. He has all the skills necessary to win this competition handily but, only if he gets his audience right.

ilene levy wrote:

God, Bourdain, you are a GEM! Brilliant, great clarity and beautifully cut!! Never in the history of all personkind has there been a better blogger...you are the Beethoven of blogging and The Beatles of blogging, with a soupcon of Confuscious and a dollop of Dickens folded into the mix!!!
If I could never watch another episode of Top Chef it would be just fine...as long as Bourdain the Bard continues to paint those glorious images of cut throat cheftestants, cubans and cauliflowers for me!

ilene

FanFare wrote:

Dear A-B,

"Love to love ya, baby"... I just read your "The Nasty Bits" in 2 days. I could not put it down and laughed myself silly on my flight to Denver. It was the first book of yours that I read. It gave great insight into your world. I appreciated your chapter on Rocco. That said, it dismayed me when I read your comment (last week) that disparaged him as being a Bertolli hawker. You made it seem as though he was selling swamp land in Florida! Frozen foods have been a big boon to we mere mortal home cooks - who do not have the time or repertoire to concoct great meals every night to our hordes of hungry family members. I actually feel sorry for Rocco for being kicked out of his own restaurant by the big, booming, overly pompous Jeffrey Chodorow! Certainly, Rocco has suffered enough humiliation and deserves to make a living somehow.

Last night's challenge disappointed that Howie (sweathog extraordinare) slipped through the noose once more. I cannot even stomach looking at him preparing food while sweats drips into it! Even the sound of his voice grates on the nerves. He needs to get over himself (if that were possible).

Although Hung "hung himself" with his grandiose dream of reinventing a cold classic, at least he was savvy enough to be a good team player for the black team. Howie doesn't care about playing nice with others as long as he is in charge. That attitude will not carry him much farther in the race.

I think the black team won mostly by going with the flow of the changed situation and just having fun with it. Tre was laughing while preparing his winning dish. By contrast, the orange team lost due to sulking about being disappointing about not being able to get down with their bad selves, and having each other as team mates. They didn't even try to "sell it" (their products) which should have been pretty easy to do with a bunch of drunks would probably have eaten crapola on a stick.

Again, thanks for your verbose, witty comments. I look forward to reading them each week. (I have to read more of your books.) Your writing is fun in the sun!

Susan wrote:

I love your blogs, Anthony! Now that it says "Bourdain's Blog" I take it you're no longer a guest-blogger, but you've got your own blog here? YES!

I adore that big lug Haunted Howie, it was difficult watching him crash and burn in this episode. What he did with that Cuban sandwich...I couldn't believe it. Howie screwing up pork? Who decides to make a Cuban without verifying that there's a press first? Pushing on the sandwich with a cookie sheet or whatever is not acceptable. Even if you sit on it for maximum pressure.

Your comments about Hung are dead on too. Cauliflower foam to "cleanse the palate"? Is the heat getting to him or what? Why would anyone make a foam of anything after Season 2? He and some of the other chefs were trying too hard in this competition. When it comes to ice cream and bar food, experimenting or getting fancy is not a good call.

maryrose wrote:

Seeing Rocco reminded me how much I adored him and Mama and The Restaurant. Please, please, please, rerun it one more time, dear powers-that-be. Many would watch, especially when Top Chef is running concurrently.

Jon wrote:

I learned a valuable quote years ago in the restaurant business "Give the people what they want, not what you think they need."

If only howie and hung coulda followed that one....

Shelema wrote:

Well said Mr Bourdain. As far as Rocco goes, anyone who watched his behavior during The Restaurant can understand where you're coming from. And you've made it quite clear how talented Rocco is. That's what makes what happend so tragic in my opinion. What I and the rest of the public saw was a man who ultimately loved attention and the cameras more than he loved running his restaurant. I think he spent more time posing for pictures than cooking or monitoring the staff.

But hey we all make mistakes and hopefully he learned from his.

You're right about Hung and Howie too. If Hung doesn't get his ego in check, it'll be the end of him in the competition. Seems to me that Howie is so worried about being stabbed in the back by someone else that he's becoming a jerk himself. Not intentionally of course but I think he doesn't want to be the dupe who never saw it coming.

Gayle Samson wrote:

I agree with your comments, however I think that C.J. tried to organize and calm down his team as best he could at the food market, and then caved in to the hopelessness of the team dynamics.
This may have been said before, but the camera always cuts away when Howie's sweat is pouring into his headband but it makes me want to hurl. Buy him one of those tennis headbands or something. I makes me not want to eat out anywhere.

Jessica M wrote:

I don't know if you actually read these but I love your blogs (on top chef and on ruhlman) and your books...keep blogging!

My brother, in typical teenager fashion, has decided he wants to be a chef, never mind that he doesn't even know where the pans are in the kitchen (I know this becuase he is in love with my blueberry buckle and couldn't help me make it because he didn't know where anything was!). I plan on buying him all of your books for Christmas--I think he needs a major wakeup call.

Dean wrote:


The wonderful thing about each new episode is the anticipation of reading Mr. Bourdain comments afterwards.

Thank YOU very much !!

You have constantly gave me endless laughs and tons of amusing yet spot on insights since the start of your blogging.

I agree with others who stated that your blog is THE BEST!

Pamela wrote:

I was simply angry while watching the challenge. I watched the segment leading up to it, realized what was going on, and suddenly began to wonder whether the producers were deliberately trying to entrap one of the female chefs that evening.

I realize that the kitchen environment of the show isn't anything like real life - it would be impossible to judge each of these contestants in their element, full plate of carefully composed, tested, polished food placed up for judging. So they design wild challenges in order to test the limits of each person's various skill sets, ultimately ending with (presumably) the best all-around contender.

But in the real world and nearly any other situation you'd be able to change before work! If nothing else, they should have let each contestant pack an emergency change of shoes and clothes at the beginning of the original competition just as a courtesy since they knew they'd be doing location work throughout. I feel like Bravo set this challenge up poorly and maliciously. They told the chefs that they were going out and, what's more, they were being videotaped -- so they went all-out with the traditional nightclub clothing. If you're a woman and you're going to be clubbing on cable television, you dress up and plan to spend a lot of the night sitting at a table sipping drinks so you can still walk by the time you leave. It's not a matter of decorum, it's not a matter of ability or drive or anything else - it was a *humiliating* setup for the women, plain and simple. And it's not like Sara could take off her(lovely but completely inappropriate and potentially dangerous with those ties in the back) shirt to reveal a comfortable undershirt underneath like Tre.

Sure, it would have been fantastic if Sara and Casey had put it behind them and stepped up to the challenge... but I think personally I would have been too busy wondering whether the producers have come to the opinion that the female contestants should be penalized for the sin of not acting and dressing exactly like the men outside of the top chef kitchen - a terrible problem in the food world as it is. And while I'm sure that the above mention of women who can cook in stilettos was well-meant, you can be sure that most women would never wear shoes for clubbing to work. Some heels *are* sturdy enough to be worn during the workday grind, but I'm betting these women weren't thinking "hmm, if I had to stand and cook in these would my feet tear?" Personally I don't wear my Dr. Scholl's to the club and I look forward to kicking them off later and getting a good night's rest for them to recover before work!

Sara didn't get the food out quickly enough, which is absolutely a fair reason to ask her to leave, even if it was in part the responsibility of her teammates. But this challenge was ill-conceived and painful to watch. I don't really think the ability to survive sleep deprivation, foot pain and embarrassment should be criteria in this kind of good-natured competition! It's certainly no fun to watch.


All that said... CAULIFLOWER?

Brendan Mackie wrote:

Mr. Bourdain, you're one of the craftiest, snarkiest, tastiest food writers out there! From an aspiring food journalist, you're freggin' awsome!

B

njfoodie wrote:

Tony Bourdain's blog has me in tears. His insight and sarcasm are, as always, the best. And I'm loving the Rocco match-up between the two, but to say that Bourdain could ever be jealous of Rocco DiSpirito I liken to a Samurai being jealous of Tom Cruise.

Kendra wrote:

Yay! An Anthony Bourdain exclusive blog! My prayers have been answered! :) Thank you gods of snark and chefness! Hopefully this will become a Top Chef staple, the show is made about 87% more enjoyable knowing that I'll get to read your biting comments about it afterwards Mr. Bourdain. Many thanks!

eden wrote:

More Bourdain Wisdom. Thanks for accepting the commentary possition. It's fun to read the Monday Morning Quarterback... especially since I respect and share most of your opinions.
I Crave Grits today.

Dervin wrote:

You are spot on about Rocco and Hung. I think Hung i

I think the Howie's antics is a cover for his lack of talent. Like when Hung or any of the top half chefs screw up it's because they took a risk which didn't really work. But Howie's screw ups seem to be a result of either just a bad palate or execution.

Am I the only one who really would really liked to have seen Lia in a clubbing outfit? D@mn you Judges!!!!!

psychomom wrote:

Tony,
I love you.

nursetimber wrote:

Anthony,

Yes!!!!!!!!!Great blog. Like Pat stated you are dead on!!!!!!! Great job. Not only good looking but a wonderful " blogger".

I am not a chef and will never be one ( not even close) but truly enjoy the show. I love the creativity but as stated, look you you are serving the food to. Hungs ice cream idea was just disgusting. He is so talented but he is too into himself and I think that it will not serve him well in the future. The food served to the post party goers was not what I would want after my fun night of drinking and dancing. Everything should have been a lot simpler. How can one ruin a milk shake? Get a Magic Bullet and call it a day. Jeez.

Sara and her complaints about her attire. Oh c'mon. I am a woman and by stating the things she did............. I think it makes women look like crybaby idiots. Deal with it. I was embarrassed when she said the things she did. Demoralized, oh please.

Good job Anthony. I would love for you to continue with guest blogs but I like seeing Chef Tom's as well.

Robin wrote:

I must tell you that Chef Tom has really been off his mark of late, and your wit and enthusiasm is making him look mighty bland. I would welcome you to the Judge's table with open arms. But tell me, Anthony, are you really jealous of that skinny kid Rocco? He isn't worthy to shine your shoes.

Nani wrote:

As far as Bourdain is concern I do not think much of you either, but as far as Howie is concern I'am discusted by his behavior, I would hate to work in a kitchen that he is the chef in.

Laurie wrote:

That I am actually participating in the blogesphere comes as a surprise to me, but last night's fashion fracas has me chomping to comment. I can understand Casey and Sara's wardrobe concerns, unfortunately however I cannot relate to how they reacted.

I am a women in a male dominated field (a union stagehand who no longer feels the need to dress like one of the guys). Like Mr. Bourdain suggests, I can work all night (in lower heeled boots) and still kick teamster a** if needed. But realistically that comes from confidence born of age and experience and in Casey and Sara's defense, I'd venture to guess the women chefs he refers to are over 30 and have built estimable reputations for themselves.

But I'm troubled by Mr. Allen's painfully PC softball defense. No, women do not want to be seen as dolled up sex objects. But there is nothing wrong or unprofessional in being attractive or wearing the clothes the situation has dealt. A business woman doesn't get to the level of executive if her luggage is lost during an important business trip and she backs out of the meeting. She goes to the meeting, apologizes for her attire and proceeds to conduct business. When there is a task at hand and a team depending on you, a professional steps up to the plate and performs regardless of the situation (be it wardrobe or hangover).

Mr. Allen does women a disservice by implying we need to be attired in a particular fashion to be granted respect. None of the contestants, men included, were appropriately attired for the kitchen, but only two allowed it to distract them from the challenge they were given. Perhaps with age and the confidence of experience, Casey and Sara will learn (to misquote John Houseman) a chef's coat doesn't make you a chef, you earn it.

Waxobe wrote:

Hello Anthony,

Great to hear you will be blogging from now on for the show; your wit and frankness are appreciated. Now, to the question I had. I have heard Tom say, and others, that being a chef is so much more than being able to put something nice on a plate. Yet, this show more and more seems to be about only that. Even during judging, we are told "we only judge the food", okay. If that is the case, why not call it "Top Cook?". After all, if the only thing that matters is the ability to make something tasty, what is the purpose of all the backstage drama being filmed at all? The reason I bring this up, is the situation with Howie. Now, I have no doubt the man can cook, but I also know that every time he has been on a team, that team has been on the losing end. Why are facts such as these glossed over? I could go back to previous seasons as well, but specifically, why does what happens "behind the scenes" not given more consideration? It seems to me, admitedly not in the know, that a true chef has a lot more characteristics than "cooking something good". I would say you have to pass this test before you even get on the show (though I admit some of the dishes could lead one to think otherwise). Since you have worked in the industry, as well as Tom, your insights about what it takes to be a top chef matter more than someone being able to freeze pasta for two. Just my thoughts, thanks for the great work.

Darren MacFarlane wrote:

Very well written, on point, and wittingly funny. While watching the show last night, I found myself agitated again with Hung's arrongance and decisions. I guess Hung did not learn from his pal Marcell, who concocted (if I remember correctly) avacado and bacon ice cream last season. Jesus...cauliflower for texture? Try some gobs of cookie dough! Keep up the brilliant commentary!

kathy taus wrote:

I've worked with women cooks who could crank out a hundred fifty meals off a very busy grill station in freakin' stilettos and still have the energy to give Howie the beating of his life

Oh, no you didn't. Maye you think they could have, but they would never have cranked out those meals wearing stilettos. Barefoot would be better.

Dari wrote:

Great blog as usual. Never heard of Rocco before last weeks episode. Don't care about him. I haven't seen Sara produce anything out of the ordinary and was wondering why she was still on the show. Same goes for the other Sara. Nothing impressive. I have to admit that I'm not really into any of the chefs this season. They do seem more professional and there seems to be less drama, which I appreciate after last seasons bozo chefs, but I don't really care who wins at this point. Howie comes off as a douche bag to me, and Hung's personality is just plain irratating. Seems to me he could use a monkey right now.

Connie wrote:

You are absolutely my hero. You are a great chef (cook and leader!) and you are hilarious.

I watch Top Chef to remind me of every chef I worked with during a 30 year hospitality and food & beverage career. Every one of the personalities is in this series. If I miss it in one season you can bet it will be int the next season.

In hotels you have the opportunity to see the best and the worst of the chef world. What I see as downfalls in these chefs is the same downfalls I saw in chefs for 30 years. It really isn't rocket science. You must be able to cook but leadership will be the salve that holds together the entire operation. Very few chefs in the corporate hospitality world actually have the chance to cook but all have the opportunity to access a situation and execute a successful operation. To me, that is what a chef is. Truly a cook who can lead well. Bullies don't build teams. Wimps fall in line behind the leader but they do get to cook. Elitists cannot build a menu to please their customers because they are too busy trying to educate their palates instead of giving them a dining experience.

The recent episode with a "roach coach" for the after hours crowd should have emphasized more the need to be effective in changes of plans. Hotels are 24/7 operations, as are many food operations. I cannot tell you how many times I had planned a night out with friends only to find myself behind the line cracking eggs for 700 Shriners for a breakfast. None of the line cooks showed up to prep the breakfast buffet so the managers of the hotel got a call at 1:00 am to come in and get the buffet ready.

I have washed dishes in a formal and served drinks to 500 people who had just been served raw Chicken Kiev because a new prep cook was not properly supervised. Food and the food industry are fluid. If you are not willing to change plans and adapt at the drop of a hat, you have no business being in the food business.

Elisabeth wrote:

Mr. Bourdain,

The challenge given to the chefs this week seems like it would be one everyone could have had fun with. Team Black’s decision to break up the space to provide good, quick food to a drunk crowd was what was needed. The decision to also keep the party going by “hawking” the food and keeping the crowd entertained and fed was great. I would’ve wanted to have some of that food after a night of partying. I think that the chefs on Team Black had a good time with this challenge.

In contrast, Team Orange didn’t implode, they never got off the ground. At first CJ seem to try to reign in his apathetic teammates, but he gave up and removed himself from the kitchen. I think that Casey ‘s days are numbered as well as Howie’s. Howie is never consistent in his meals; they are either great or horrible. Casey is consistent, she is consistently mediocre. Team Orange’s food just did not look appetizing to me due to their poor communication and execution of the challenge.

I loved watching season one of Top Chef, I loved season two as well. I loved them because the cooking was a great as the drama. In season three I am finding that what I enjoy most is your blog the next day. Mr. Bourdain, I am so glad to see that you will have a permanent blog about the show. Your comments and observations of each episode have been wonderful; witty, acerbic and entertaining. For me, it has kept me watching the show when I was just about to stop. Thanks!

Kim wrote:

Great blog.

Howie is an idiot. The number one quality of a great leader is their ability to listen, filter out good information,make logical decisions and lead others. Howie is irrational, pig-headed and truly mean. He's not a good team player - and, how can you be a Top Chef if no one in your kitchen can stand to work for you??? I hope Howie goes home next week. Hung gets on my nerves, but at least he can defer to others in a team situation.

HOWIE NEEDS TO GO.

Jon Vedamuthu wrote:

Bourdain--nice song reference in title to your post. How come Traffic doesn't get much love these days? Just never figured your punk-bent tastes might bend towards Stevie and the boys...oh, well. Always appreciate your commentary. You're harsh with these guys, but fair. And as for harsh: I was dismayed when I read about Ruhlman's return to the CIA and how much more "sensitive" the training had become. That was the GREAT thing about coming up through a kitchen (i started as a dish-bitch, ended up as pretty decent saute guy): when someone gave you positive reinforcement, you knew you had EARNED it. Otherwise: do it better, do it faster, 'causes someone else probably can, and until you do...well, don't get comfortable or expect any fake/faint praise. Those who hate Bourdain's ripping probably shouldn't consider restaurant work as their calling. Do it faster, do it better, and until you can, remember the man's four words: STFU!

Sue wrote:

I was really excited to see your picture today along with all the other blogs. Hopefully this means you are no longer "temporary" and staying for the long haul. Somehow you bring more credibility to an already amazing and talented show. But having you here just makes it BETTER. Love you!

Dee Zine wrote:

Geez, what an essay! "Magnificent, sweat-slicked battering ram of a noggin"??? I'm a writer. I bow and scrape and kiss your feet.

You're just a freakin' genius. Once you've summed up an episode, there's nothing left to say. Except, of course, BRILLIANT!

Lynn wrote:

Hi Tony - I absolutely love your blog! Harold's used to be my favorite - which I still love to read his insight - and I enjoy the others, but your style of writing is like the perfect potato chip - salty, crisp, approachable, and completely satisfying. I love how you call them like you see them - unabashedly, and yet not mean-spirited. I am looking forward to finishing my current book so I can go get Kitchen Confidential!

Just curious about your opinion of other chefs out there, like one who was a guest judge on Season One? He has (I believe) a Vietnamese restaurant in California and seemed rude to the contestants, and Harold actually called him out in a blog in Season 2 when he was a guest judge again. Seems to me Harold's candor mirrors yours...no wonder you two are my faves!

cynthia wrote:

Howie wins Top Sweat.
Did you see another week of Howie flavoring his food with a big drop of Howie drippings. This one off the tip of his nose. UGH. He gets bossier and more disgusting each week.
I knew Sara was going to get ousted. From the opening, she was setting herself up for the boot.
We can now look forward to another week of Sweat, Crawlin' and Plop.

ChefBert wrote:

Great Blog Tony!!! Gotta love the Traffic reference! Boy was this a traffic accident or what, with Howie throwing Sara under the bus, with her help of course.

As a pro chef with almost 20 yrs under my belt, I am amazed by some of the antics I see. BTW, having worked with Govind many years ago, its great to see his success, a great guy, very talented and fun to work (and sweat) with.

As a relative new-comer to Miami cuisine, the first thing I learned is that the Latino community knows their food. If they say the Arroz con Pollo is not good, then Hung, my Flash-Gordon friend, they are right and you are wrong. And Howie should know better than to turn out a sub-par Cuban sandwich. If its not done right they will nail you for it, and good.

I am sorry the way Howie treated Sara, she deserves some criticism, but not that kind of treatment. Howie, if you acted like that in my kitchen, you would be gone in 5 minutes, even if you could cook like Escoffier. Kitchen's run on hard work, good taste, and esprit de corps. Howie seems to fail on all counts, witness his not getting everything on the plate.

Keep up the great work Chef Tony

Gail wrote:

Anthony- Your rather insightful blog had me laughing all the way to the roach coach! Keep up the greata blogging!

About the issue of the sudden change in plans- Sara: Get past it! You want to be a Top Chef? Then be ready to change plans at a moment's notice. We own a business which operates during the nighttime, and my job often has crises. We've missed many events because 5 minutes before we leave the house, the phone rings, and one of us is called out. You get over it, do the job, and look forward to the next event. Moaning, whining, and generally being a biatch about it does nothing except make you look bad. (I can ask, tho, why TC didn't think to provide chef's coats to those who needed them to protect nice clothing from kitchen stains.) Howie- Leading does not mean bullying. Look past your own sweat beaded nose and learn to WORK with people, not bully them. Hung- For goodness sakes, get over yourself. I personally would love to meet this monkey of yours who's obviously a better cook than you are! Perhaps he should be hiding under your toque ala Remy in Ratatoullie. Maybe then you'd realize cauliflower and ice cream just DO NOT belong together!

Shazzer wrote:

Could you please come over and cook with me? God, I'd love that!

Margaret E. wrote:

Mr. Bourdain, Thank you for well written, amusing and literate blogs. I have throughly enjoyed your wry comments - it's so great to read something from someone who can write! Keep up the great blogs. And thanks for hopefully nudging Rocco back toward the kitchen with good natured and sincere appreciation of his true talent - as a chef.

rich wrote:

Chef Bourdain, nicely put....I had a list a bitches and observations, but as usual, you have set the culinary record straight on the likes of Sara, Howie and of course, the resident James Beard impersonator himself, Hung....or should I say Village Idiot. Maybe us common folk just couldn't appreciate the healthy combination and crunch of cauliflower in our 1000 calorie ice cream....we may just have to leave that upper class taste sensation to the likes of Queen Elizabeth, Marselle, Hung and the Zagat's. This guy hasn't won crap in any challange and has the balls to snap at every judge that does him injustice...do the other chef's know he calls them monkey's?..I feel sorry for the folks who have to taste his abominations....I wouldn't feed it to my dog, and he's been dead for several years now......who eats black chicken anyway? :) Maybe he'd do well on " Bizarre Foods"?....maybe not....

JaxieWaxieWoo wrote:

I must confess that, though I find the food misblend in my current sober state about as appetizing as a peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwich, I have survived a few drunken nights where cauliflower and ice cream probably would have sounded as acceptable a combination as pairing pig with roast. Oh, pig roast...yummmm.... drool drool....

Lisa in Tx wrote:

Once again, reading your recap is the cherry on the top of the sundae of the show. Your inimitable style totally fits both the absurdity of the show (and it IS absurd, even though I watch it every week and have for 3 seasons now) and the real truth that comes out of it - who'd work well with others, but isn't a milquetoast, who knows how to cook from the brain AND the gut, who's able to lift the commonplace to the sublime without getting pretentious.

And yes, I, too, weep for the loss of Rocco in a kitchen. He's young. Hopefully he can get back to HIS basics, and soon.

By the way, I'd love to see (hear) you do a podcast. It'd almost be redundant, because your writing style IS your speaking style, and everyone I know says they can hear you speak when they read your blogs. But it'd still be hugely entertaining!

Deanie wrote:

Love your comments and just finished your last book. You are impartial, so damn good looking, never miss you on Travel station and it's good to see you on Top Chef!

Tina wrote:

Bravo! You Rock Bourdain! Love love your show! That's rock too! It's always enjoyable reading anything you write. Keep us entertained. Howie is such a meathead! He should of gone home long time ago...he's just such sad case and needs to check himself how to talk to ppl in general!

Trevor wrote:

CJ and Tre in the final..... CJ takes it in the end.

chutneycarnival wrote:

Mr. Bourdain, you are my idol! insightful + witty blogs are the best. it's like reading short story! Loves it!

Commodore wrote:

After last weeks epsiode where the winners received trips to Italy and this week the where the winner received just a recipe book I am left to ponder why the guest judges feel that there books are a magnificent prize for winning? Perhaps ego driven? I then realized that the reruns of the first episode, where the guest judge gives an armload of his books as a prize, do not show this presentation of the books. The reruns only briefly show the winner entering the room with his books. Could it be because this would show the guest judge being hypocritical for describing another chef as having " the inevitable collisions between ego and ambition?"

Alessandra wrote:

Tony, you're the best! I love you. You are my fantasy man, that I'd like to make a reality ;)

jul wrote:

chef, your blogs are certainly as entertaining as the show (and i love the show!), so i can hardly wait for next week.
thanks for showing us how it's done.

jackie wrote:

Mr. B
You just crack me up and I couldn't agree more with your assessment of Hung's choice for ice cream. Cauliflower needs to breaded and deep-fat fried!

Pinup_Girl wrote:

Tony, I WORSHIP you. Thanks for the blog.

S wrote:

I actually really like Howie. The others use him as a scapegoat so they can save themselves and cover up their own weaknesses. He's just defending himself, and the others are ganging up on him! No excuse about the cuban sandwiches, but the menu, which was a great one, was all his idea.

Sara N was the right choice. Who makes milkshakes with ICE?!!! =/

Lisa wrote:

Regarding Hung and ice cream -- maybe he does like cauliflower foam on his vanilla cone. Maybe he craved it as a child and couldn't find it anywhere and now was his opportunity to fulfill that childhood desire. Okay, I'm trying to figure out a legitimate reason anyone would add foam - let alone cauliflower foam - to ice cream.

Regarding Rocco, so I must have my head buried in the sand because I had never heard of him until The Restaurant. And then I only tuned in to see some guy try to find space, gut it, and decorate it (not to mention get all the permits and sign-offs) and open it in 6 weeks. THAT was a train-wreck waiting to happen. I won't even go into season 2. I will take your word that he is an outstanding chef when he wants to cook. Hopefully his lesson of fame is learned by all -- it's fun while it lasts but reality alway rears up to bite you in the arse.

Mary wrote:

That was a helluva blog. But why no comments on Tre's winning dish? Would like your perspective on it and on Tre.

Katie wrote:

LOL. Kudos for the skillful use of "buttwad"!!

vickie k. wrote:

Couldn't agree more about Howie. What the bull-headed ones in all the seasons don't seem to understand is that, while it a competition, you NEED your teammates with you until you're down to two. It's that simple. Harold and Elan must have known this to a degree? As for you Mr. Bourdain, Bravo! You're a fantastic, funny and insightful writer. I love your commentary. And, Hung...well, he seems to be "getting it" little by little; I'm actually warming up to him now. And, as one of the poster stated they need Howie for dramatic appeal (as far as him winning, no way: my money is on Tre)
Peaches...

Tom wrote:

Okay, yes, white chocolate cauliflower foam isn't exactly playing to win. It's not even playing with a full deck.

But notice that, when elimination was on the line, Hung went with onion rings and chicken wings. You think any monkey couldn't make onion rings and wings for drunks?

Maybe his head isn't as far into that meat grinder as it looks.

Wayne wrote:

Tony great blog.. I love your show also. The problem i have with this show is the lack of following directions, they give the chef's what i think is a clear picture of what they want them to cook being it a theme or style of cooking... After watching the cooking selections i have ask myself if they were listening at all
mabey this makes for drama for the show but it's no way to win
a challenge.


E. Graham wrote:

Thanks for the post, Mr. B; I also always enjoy your travel shows.

I'm a big fan of Tre's; he's one of the few contestants who doesn't constantly have ego drama, consistently prepares wonderful food and exhibits a level of maturity that's refresing to see after witnessing Hung, Howie, the two Sarah's etc. They quickly become taxing to watch.

crazylove wrote:

I'm in complete agreement when it came to Hung's ice cream. I respect him for not wanting to go the conventional route (and let's face it, the peach cobbler riff was uninspired at best), but CAULIFLOWER??? Seriously now. Cauliflower FOAM? I would love to know what he's thinking sometimes. It sounded disgusting to me.

As far as Sara and Casey's complaints about dress go, I thought they were completely justified. It's not really about the fact that heels and low-cut blouses are uncomfortable (although unless you've had to cook in heels for five hours you have no idea how uncomfortable they really can be. Men are terrifically lucky that their club gear is relatively comfortable. The girls faced a challenge in this one that the men didn't, which wasn't fair). The complaints that they had were about the fact that those chefs have fought tooth and nail for every ounce of respect that they get in that kitchen, in a way that male chefs don't have to. Those women are playing in a men's game, and it's incredibly demeaning to try and be assertive while dressed like a sex object. Men don't take girls who are dressed like that seriously, and it showed last night. I thought it was unfair that Sara got kicked off and Casey got chastised for not being a leader on the team, when most people would find it impossible to get people to take them seriously as a leader because if they were wearing those clothes. It's not about comfort (although it's unfair that the women were expected to uncomplainingly battle sore calves and feet while the men didn't have to), it's about respect and professionalism. I didn't think the producers showed much of either by being so insensitive with that challenge.

Anthony wrote:

Gee-whiz, I hope none of these comments go to your head and end up spoiling the pho. But on the bright side, if you ever run out of toilet paper while traveling the world seeking culinary advertures, there's at least 9 people above ready to de-brown your rosebud for you. Hopefully none with pierced tongues that might scrape or otherwise scratch your delicates.

Jeff wrote:

Seeing Rocco in commercials to promote a contest in which the winner get's to be his co-host on an online cooking show is further evidence of how the mighty have fallen. I am left to wonder if the online cooking show will be a 1:00 minute clip posted on youtube with Rocco's mother behind the camera.

If Rocco fails to take your advice Tony, I suggest that he might want to consider entering himself as a contestant on a show such as The Next Food Netw... err.. make that "The Once and Future Food Reality Star" and see if people actually tune in.

julie wrote:

Tony, Love your blog here.

Re: Rocco. Were you hard on him? I thought you said the truth, and rather nicely at that.

I think of Rocco as a metaphor for the two kinds of "Top Chef" winners. Rocco of days gone by--talented, dedicated to his craft-- reminds me a bit of Harold Dieterle, winner of Season 1, a chef with obvious total commitment to craft over celebrity.

TC's Rocco, Rocco of "The Restaurant"---seems, like TC winner of Season 2 Ilan--more interested in being a celebrity than anything else. That's been his downfall--shockingly obvious in the attitudes of the TC cheftestants--and I guess he just doesn't care.

Rocco could make a great comeback, but his appearance on TC didn't seem to show him heading in that direction. Too bad.

rae ann wrote:

mr. bourdain, i adore your blog title music references almost as much as your comments! traffic this week, the clash last week, what else is on your ipod? i'm dying to see if you can work some roxy music or tom petty titles into the fray. looking forward to next week!

Misha wrote:

Boo Howie... I know Sara had a tough time dealingwith the Challange. And she definatley didn't preform at her best, but Howie has been apart of EVERY losing team. Is there a pattern here? No offense to him, but his brash behavior completely crushes any hope of team spirit. I definaltely think the judges made a mistake last night. and BTW the Cuban Sandwhich looked like a chunk of hard bread... not cool Padma, not cool

stella wrote:

What it boils down to is: do what you are good at.

For instance, you are just one funny guy and wickedly amusing. You do what you do best - writing and entertaining others.

DiSpirito is talented in cooking and not apparently doing TV shows or blogging, so he should go back to what he does best.

But at the end at least he has the guts to try for something that he wants to do. Just as you can't blame Michael Jordan for trying out baseball, you can't blame DiSpirto for trying to be a TV personality.

Are you sick of the product placements in this show yet? I am just waiting for the final 4 contestants to finally get serious and produce better chow (predicting CJ, Casey, Tre, Hung).

Evelyn wrote:

Tony, will you marry me? If so, i will divorce my husband by this afternoon!

So dead on Tony!! Howie, what were you thinking?!? I also totally agree with Pat.

Princessa wrote:

Bourdain,

Still think that you will never understand what it is like to wear heels and try to do anything. Every woman is not at her best when it comes to wearing heels (she may be at her sexiest but not at her most efficient self).

Howie, did destroy a Miami Classic and lacks the personality to work with people. Sara should have taken off the heels and borrowed one of the guys shirts so she could have worked better. She has the time to get better but Howie is a disgrace to Miami. Now I don't even want to go to Food Gang.

Bilybob wrote:

People, people, please learn how your browser spell checks your blogs! It's getting tiresome.

I'm not a chef, but I love to cook. I also play golf, but I don't go "golfiing". Neither one of these words should be used as a verb. You can be a chef and can play the game of golf, but you should never say that you DO either one.

Okay, so Howie is a jerk in the kitchen. At least he shows a lot more enthusiasm and leadership than most of the contestants this season. He's probably been the most controversial and well liked contestant of all three seasons. I was more than a little pissed off when he was let off the hook for not completing his dish in the first episode because I was a big fan of Dave in Season One, but I could see why the decision was made to cut Clay because his dish was really, really bad.

Anthony, I hope you're going to be a permanent member here on the BRAVO blogosphere for Top Chef. I really enjoy reading your musings. I also hope that Chef Tom somehow finds time to join in this fun sometime soon.

Billybob

Tim wrote:

Tony I only want to say you should be made an honorary Ramone.

Thank you for the dead on post script on Rocco.

Rai Booker wrote:

Tony,

If I wasn't married and you didn't eat such strange things on No Reservations, I'd snatch you up simply to keep my amused!!! Awesome blog posting!

But just in case I get divorced and you turn into a burgers & fries kinda guy - please note that I can cook in heels and smack folks around at the same time... Yes, its a talent!

Impatiently waiting for your next post - Rai

quori wrote:

Anthony, I was never a fan of yours previously. I thought you were loud, obnoxious, and arrogant. I also always felt your palate must be destroyed from all the cancer sticks you devour, and that your impression of the taste of food must be skewed beyond all reason as a result.

Ever since your first appearance in episode 1, I have changed my tune…to a degree. I still think you smoke too much. And at times you amaze me with your “Stinky tofu tastes really really good!” no kidding…people wouldn’t eat it if it were awful tasting. I sometimes wish you were less John Madden in your critique, and more …more…well, more YOU! Examples: to Howie in ep1: “What is your major malfunction!??!” and in this blog…”what ice cream did to him. Not what he can do to ice cream.” One comment is in your face and forces someone to face the truth. The other does the same exact thing, less abrasively and more poetically.

I agree completely that Sara’s excuses were just that. She should have overcome those challenges, not succumb to them. Maybe it isn’t fair to try and cook in high heels and what not, but who ever said life is fair?!?! It isn’t about that, its about drive and determination.

I find Howie’s behavior appalling and disgraceful. Especially his kicking of Sara while she was down, literally. I found it notable that the final scene showed everyone sitting on one side of the room and Howie alone on the other.

He’ll go home soon enough, and we will know exactly who he has to blame for that.

Kristen Katz wrote:

Oh Tony- my husband knows you are my "free pass" if we ever wind up on a deserted island. However, I disagree on the whole sexist issue last night. To level the playing field- everyone should have gotten clogs with their knives. And jackets to cover the boobies. Although Hung blew the quickfire- I thought it was good to see him playing nicely with his team. He may not fall on his sword after all.

Chadner wrote:

I don't really understand how people do not sympathize with Sara. Please try to cook in a low-cut top and heels and jewelry in a competition against a bully like Howie before passing judgement. It is incredibly unfortunate that they tricked the chefs the way they did. In a way, there is some sexism involved in the decision to go about the challenge in this manner. If you don't think women having to run around and compete in heels and "clubbing" clothing while Tre is cooking dressed with a wife beater on is an even playing field, you are sorely mistaken. The disparity between what women typically wear on a night out compared to what men wear is far too great especially when you factor in what everyone would love to cook in. I think there wasn't much thought that went in when deciding on this challenge. What would have happened if one of the girls was wearing a tight strapless minidress? Surely that's appropriate clubbing attire, but how could she cook in that?

Joy wrote:

I don't think Casey and Sara's discomfort had to do with high heels. Casey stated that she didn't let people in her kitchen see her dressed up. Sara said she felt demoralized. I think it has more to do with respect for a female chef. Imagine being a female mortgage officer and being called into the bank to deal with customers in your going out for the evening "sexy" clothes. You would feel uncomfortable and inappropriate. Imagine the male chefs being asked to cook and serve people while wearing speedos.

Linda wrote:

Great insight and great wit, per usual.

Oh btw Nani?
I love Bourdain, but when it comes to who is the better cook, I doubt many people who know what they're talking about would choose Anothony over that skinny "kid" Rocco.
Do some research!

mary wrote:

This is the best blog you have written for Top Chef to date!! I was laughing out loud through most of it. The way you describe Hung and Howie is priceless (and absolutely truthful). I hope you will continue with a blog every season of Top Chef!

rachel wrote:

Chef,
Great blog. Love the incisiveness, the wit, and the honesty. It's become an integral part of the show to log on and see how you and some of the others analyze the challenges- and the humor just makes it better. Thanks for doing it!

lauren wrote:

Anthony you are the wind beneath my wings. your clever titles "lost in the supermarket" (clash) or this week which references the epic band traffic , and then your blogs, your books , your show... I don't know you may just be the best dude ever. Come do a No Reservations in SAN FRANCISCO please.... id kinda die if I ran into you on the streets