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Pornstars and Prisoners

July 10, 2007

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Okay, right off the bat, let's talk about my date with Mike “The Mouth” Matusow. Let’s see...I’m trying to think of a bad poker pun. How about this one: “I guess Mike and I aren’t going all in on love.” No, not quite -- let’s try another one: “Mike made me fold the pocket aces in my heart.”

Alright, screw the puns, and cut the crap: Mike Matusow is a freaky dude, and you didn’t even see the half of it. The part that didn’t make the show is that we went back to my house, Tom and his loser friends were in my dining room playing poker, and they talked Mike into playing with them. Then they made me get them Doritos and beer, so I kicked them out, and then Mike talked me into playing strip poker with him. That was a really bad idea because Mike is a professional poker player, and in like 3 minutes, he had me down to my bra and panties, which is when I said good night... And leave the damn Doritos!

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Comments

Micah wrote:

Hi Kathy!
I bet you were really happy hosting the Gay Porn Awards, late or not! You go, girl!
And Prison? You've been to Iraq and Afghanistan, and now here? You've been to places where other "A-List bores" wouldn't even think of going (Unless you're Paris Hilton or Mel Gibson. And other celebs who drink and whatnot, then go to prison.)! You're WAY above the A-List. A+ List? Above and beyond!!!!!! And they really do mean it when laughter is the best medicine... or however that quote goes.
That one Tween (The one who won't stop commenting on the blogs now),
~Micah~

Becca wrote:

I am finally first at something!

I am so sad. I just learned you were going to be in Houston later this month, and tried to get tickets, but you are sold out.

That really sucks!

Love your show!

Becca

Jordan wrote:

Hey Kathy,
I am such a big fan of yours. I think your show is so Hilarious! i watch it every week. I cant miss it! I loved this weeks episode. Just to let you know im hoping to come work for you some day! I want to be a part of you "EMPIRE" Im coming to see you in chicago in October.

Joshua wrote:

I love your attitude and confidence Kathy. I'm a New York City teacher and what I need in the end of the day is some Kathy Griffin! I love your show and truly think that you are a very talented and funny woman. Now as for Mike - he was just was too wierd. Now I've been on many dates and the one thing that is a turn off is when a man is gesturing punches and slapping......unless it's in the bedroom. :-P. Keep on going on dates....trust me, Mr.Right is out there. Talk to you later Kathy.

dana wrote:

hey kathy, i love your show! i had no idea how funny you were, keep up the good work!

Angel wrote:

It's a shame society doesn't have more programs to keep people out of prison in the first place. The segment you did with the women in the culinary arts & mechanics programs was very moving. And yeah, as a mom, I can't imagine not being able to see my kids. How sad.

I'm glad to see your mom moved in with you! Good luck ;)

Ok, I'm *not* a Sanjaya fan, but I saw him perform at the Idol Live concert and he really wasn't bad LOL.

kathy wrote:

The subtitles said that you said "forboten" stuff at the prison. From what I know of you, you probably said verboten and it's the freaks who do the subtitles who made you say a word I've never heard of. Or maybe I just haven't heard of that word. I don't really know every single word there is. You are hilarious and that dude from the beginning acted like he needed to pee the whole time he was with you. ADD-Dumb. Rock on, Red.

Angie M. wrote:

OMG Kathy just when I think the shows couldn't be any funnier, your blogs are! Keep 'em coming. I can't wait to see you in South Florida at the Hard Rock... still gotta get my tickets... but don't worry, I'll be there!! woo hoo!!!

Judee Dufresne wrote:

Kathy, I just watched you in the prisons and I saw the tears you fought back as you were affected by the pain the prisoners felt. You are a blessing and your brother would be so proud.

Brent wrote:

I was upset they didn't spend more time at the porn awards until I saw the rest of the show. I watched a repeat of the same show the next hour. Kathy is truly talented (I've seen her thrice live) but what a huge heart she has! Not to mention what a quick wit, and the show is well done, especially the editing.

Dorian Quillen wrote:

Kathy, you were really real w/the prisoners, that is why they responded to you so well! You have a gift, keep it going, girl. My mom lives w/me too and she is 72 and recovering from breast cancer. We have become HUGE fans! We plan to see you when you come to Tulsa this month, so don't cancel! Thanks for all the great laughs, Moses and the tablets, or caplets, or time-release capsules or whatever the hell they call them now! (can't keep up...)
Dorian Quillen, Oklahoma City

J wrote:

I just got out of a long relationship (literally, he moved to the other side of the US this morning) and I have to say that I unknowingly turned to you for comfort.
I thought "Hey, tonight is a good night to rent some chick flicks, get some booze in my system, and not think." I rented Her Minor Thing (which I'm sure you've hear of, hah) and cracked up when I saw your scene. You are so funny it's hard to not stop crying when you open your mouth. You were hilarious (and always are) and I just wanted to say that I wholeheartedly thank you, for sharing your humor with the world.

Donna wrote:

I just love you, Kathy! This was a great episode - from the gay porn awards to the inmates, lots of stuff ... chock full o' entertainment!

Now, and I mean this in the most sensitive way possible, I'm watching the repeat of this episode and I just have to ask, are you SURE that your writer friend is straight? Not judging, but if I had to guess I'd say he is. Seemed like he wanted you to ask him as your date to the gay porn awards, don't you think? I dunno. Just an opinion ...

Anyway, you are wonderful - thank you for all the laughs! I look forward to your show every week, and to hopefully seeing you on The View soon!! Take care!

Irvine, California wrote:

Hi, Kathy, this episode is fantastic. However, did the porn star actually wipe his lips right after you kissed him?

John wrote:

Kathy, That took a lot of balls(?) to perform in a prison-- you are fearless! I got my wife hooked on your show and want you to know that it is one of the best reality shows I've seen-- your humor is similar to mine and you crack me up constantly. Keep up the great work!

Brian wrote:

Hey, i love Kathy Griffen My Life On the D-List!!! it's my favorite show on Bravo, if they cancelled it , i would never watch Bravo again, besides Top chef!!! 2nd favorite

Erin the Schwarz Wonder wrote:

Oh my various Gods. You're my hero. Like no joke.

And if he didn't leave the Doritos...well...let's just say I know a guy...

Tina wrote:

Hey Kathy! You sooo can get someone better than Mike, and better looking than Ron Jeremy! I wish I was famous so you could rip on me. Any advice as to how to make that happen?? If so, have your people contact my people. But you gotta give me a few weeks to find some people.... Your Humor is greatly appreciated!!! Love YOU!!!

Tracy Anderson wrote:

You absolutely did the right thing.....After seeing the clip on Bravo, I instantly thought he was a living nightmare!! Did you drink at dinner? You actually let that "pig" back in your house and then play poker? You kill me......

Paul from CT wrote:

I'm a huge fan and one of your loyal gays...you've prompted my first blog entry ever.

Is there anyone you can't relate to? I continue to be impressed with how you handle yourself in ALL situations!

Until now my list of famous people that I wanted to meet before I die (or they do) was three people, Madonna, Angelina Jolie and Oprah. I now have a list of four...I added the warden of the prison. Just kidding! It's you!

Come back to Mohegan Sun soon!!!

Scarlett wrote:

Kathy--you are fabulous and I think it is beyond great that you performed for the prisoners.

RHONDA wrote:

HEY KATHY..
YEARS AGO, I WENT TO THE PORN AWARDS IN TAMPA. I HAD A BALL! I EXPECTED THE WORST AND GOT THE BEST. THEY ARE ALL EXTRA NICE AND NEVER LOOK DOWN AT YOU. OKAY, MAYBE IF THEY ARE ON THE TOP! I HAD THE BEST TIME. GETTING TO MY POINT.. I'M GLAD SOMEONE ELSE EXPERIENCED IT AND SHOWED IT TO THE WORLD. THE OTHERSIDE OF PORN.

Diana wrote:

Kathy I think that you are hysterical and that it was great that you went to the prison to perform for the prisoners. And i was afraid of Mike!!! he looked very..odd. Oh yeah and i know this wasn't on last night's show but the HSN episode was so funny!! you're the greatest

Alissa wrote:

Hi Kathy:

Every Tuesday night I look forward to watching your show. You say what everybody (or maybe just me) is thinking. Maybe you can add a show on October 22 after your Kansas City show. It's my birthday.
Alissa

Laura wrote:

I love you Kathy and i hate to say that and be so cliche like everyone else but it is true. You are F-ing awsome. Just promise that you will always be real and you will never sell out like all those other fake, annoying celebrities!!

Jessica wrote:

Kathy,
Thank you so much for everything you do! Your show makes me laugh out loud at the end of my day. I saw your show at the Buell in Denver (remember me the girl in row K - sure you do) I dragged my poor straight husband with me and we both had a blast. I just love you, your like a little, hilarious, hot-ass, fire-cracker! Thanks again.
PS. Loved the latest show - who knew the gay porn awards would be so fantastic.

Charlie wrote:

Kathy-Well I must admit I have never been a big fan of women comedians (I never saw one that made me laugh-hard) But I must admit I saw your prison episode and I really enjoyed it. You are quick on your feet and have a great gift in being able to adjust your show to fit your audiance. There was a tear in my eye also after you talked to that pregnant lady. Not to mention you are extremly easy on the eyes (OK your Hot--love red-heads) Cant wait to see your next show. Are you ever in the Twin Cities ? Charlie

Bonnie wrote:

Well- Kathy : If you do really read this. Just thank you for being your own person and not following the A-List bores. They don't like it when the truth is spoke and you hit the head on the nail. Don't change just to say you are a A-lister. You are a better person to do that. My husband wished we would of know about the trip to meet you for charity. He would of sold the farm to spend the weekend with you. Keep up the great work.

Carmen wrote:

Hi, Kathy!!!

I am sorry to hear things with Loser Mike didn't work out. I love your show and I think performing for the prisoners was very nice of you. I am very sorry about your father. He was a great man. How do I know this? He is your Dad, and you are a wonderful comedian. I know you are thinking, "cut the crap". Okay, I love your show, love your comedy, and was one of the first to buy tickets for your show in El Paso, Texas. It is my wedding anniversary the day of the show and I can't wait!!!!

:)
Carmen

Erin wrote:

Kathy
I too feel that I would be an asset to your empire, but besides that, I noticed that your show in Lafayette, Louisiana is benefiting an agency that serves survivors of sexual abuse. I am wondering why you are not coming to New Orleans (where I live) and wondering if you chose the center in Lafayette that your show will benefit?

Cecilia wrote:

Kathy, where are your gays from Season 1??

I keep hoping to see them...

Wendy wrote:

Hey Kathy, Love your show!! You are freakin hilarious! Your date with Mike "the Mouth" was a hoot. I am sure he is a nice guy, but Lord he comes across soooooooo annoying. You should think about playing in a poker event with him as your coach. I am sure you would walk away with alot of great material. Okie Dokie, Keep up the great work!!

Jerry wrote:

Hey Kath,

C'mon girl! How do you ever expect to get a little sumpin-sumpin if you can't get into the strip poker? Next step is the spit and sit!

Great show - watch reruns over and over!

Kate wrote:

Love the show, love you, love the Gay Porn Awards plus the prison show--what a gal!

Thought on the paparazzi: I think you might increase your chances of getting into the mags if you snazzed up your outfit when you went out--just some more sparkle, some more color. The black shirt and pants outfits look very nice on you and are good neutrals for your shows--yes. But for dates out on the town, you need some FASH-ON! to get into those magazines!

Rock on!

Amy Wells wrote:

Kathy,
I love you and I love Texas hold em,! I about died that you went on a date with mike!!! What a nut!!! (A RICH NUT!!) You are so funny,but seriously, its time to up your standards!!

Anna wrote:

Kathy,
Why don't you go out with that writer friend of yours? He's cute and funny. I know he can't get you publicity but you two seem to already hit it off.
-Anna

Traci O wrote:

Kathy...I am such a big fan of your show! Your personality and comedy are wonderful! Thank you for making me laugh, and I hope I get to see you LIVE here in Dallas! Keep up the good work...smart ass works these days! Please accept the job at THE VIEW if they offer it to you...you will MAKE that show interesting again! Love ya from Texas!

Lindsey wrote:

Ok, so, I was watching the last show, you know, with the prisoners in Arizona. Well, I am really enjoying myself, because I like to laugh, and all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I see one of my old co-workers. She is in prison! Imagine the shock! When I really sit and think about it, it's not so shocking that she's in prison, but to actually see her on my favorite show! I'm jealous! I almost want to be in prison, too, just so I can meet Kathy. . . welllll, maybe not. Anyway, Kathy if you read this, which would be awesome, I love you and your show. Oh, and tell Tom I would have called him sweetcheeks.

Noreen wrote:

Kathy: my husband and I love ,love, love your show!!! We are so sorry about your Dad. I cried like a baby, I kid you not. I lost my Dad not too long ago so it was very poignant esp. that last conversation on the phone. He was such a sweetie, you were lucky to have had him as long as you did. I am glad your Mom moved in, I'd hate to see her all by herself.
Honestly, I have never felt this close to anyone on TV before-It's kinda weird. But you work so hard and you are so FUNNY and just make me laugh til I pee my pants all the time!!! I wish you were on every night.
I honestly don't know why cute guys are not beating down your door-they are stupid. Course we lived in LA LA land for 14 years so I know how it can be. Don't worry, your personal cutie will come along, you deserve happiness!!!
Just curious-where did you find Tom???
Anyway Peace & Love to you and all your gang,
Noreen
Oklahoma City
come see us here-we are very Gay Friendly!!!

Carrie wrote:

Kathy: What you said about the gays being polite I know and your right and can they please throw one back once in a while. I think that you brought an impressive human element visiting the prison and it shows that life is not always funny. You should go back and do another forum with those women they seemed to know that you really cared and I thought you connected so well. Good for you.

Annie Q. wrote:

Greetings from Texas Kathy!
I was out-of-town yesterday, but I still managed to catch the show when it repeated at midnight. (Thank you Bravo for all the repeats).
As always, loved the show. The scene with the noisy vibrator from the gay porn awards gift bag was so funny! Also when you started your show for the male prisoners, and the microphone dropped down....hilarious!!! You are SO quick to come up with the funniest comments. You got them all laughing from the get-go.
Can't wait to see you LIVE in San Antonio, TX next week. My husband and I already have our tickets, and we're driving 150 miles just to go see YOU!!! I'm so exited!!! Until then, take care.

Dottie wrote:

I freakin' can't stand it...this woman is so g*dd*mn funny I need to start wearing diapers on Tuesday nights. Might be a good look for me.....!!!

Sue & Bob Kravitz wrote:

Thank You, Thank You.
Don't change. Please let us know
when you play in Philadelphia
Sue & Bob

andrea wrote:

Kathy-

I'm sure you have heard this before but you are A-List in my book! I love your show so much and I think you have the best attitude about life. I know your empire will continue to grow and I look forward to seeing you host the emmys or oscars or something. Good luck in your search for love.

Landon wrote:

Kathy,
Do you have any idea that they even show ur series here in the Philippines (the text capital of the world)? I adore your show, i presently suspect that they only show reruns here though.I really think that you are beyond A-list material, the "funniest woman alive.. in the history of mankind." Maybe you wont mind coming here, im sure there'd be a handful of fans waiting (reminds me of that Kathy Griffin day ceremony, hmhmm).

Starr Palmer wrote:

Hey Kathy! You rock. I love your show. I know there's really nothing to do in Tennessee..... But you need to come anyway. Let me know if you can have/ will have something comming up.... I'd love to meet, or just see your show. Whatever works! Keep being yourself. You're definately not "what's her face" here.

Mary from Chicago wrote:

The friggin' irony of the most recent episode of the "D list" was sooo sweet! All of these fan comments are mentioning Kathy having "balls" for performing at prison (she does) and that they were 'chock full o' balls" at the gay porn awards(indeed!)...but no one has mentioned the eyeful we all got from comedian Paul Rodriguez. When Kathy did the "advice sitdown" with him--his crotch was bursting out of his pants! I couldn't quit staring! If that man isn't stuffing his underwear with the word's biggest sock-wad then, God has blessed that sweet-mexican with one HUGE tamale!

Marty wrote:

Kathy--

after watching this episode...and seeing that woman in death row, I basically went 'off' about the system...and then my mother (watching next to me because I made her....she doesn't like your language...that nazi...) went off on me. I felt it was unfair how the woman was treated with her living routine....and my mother felt it was justified, saying "what if I was tortured and killed by someone...how would you feel..." and i immediately said, "that woman is being mentally killed every single day... 20 min. of phone a week and 3 days of exercise a week... absolutely ridiculous.... the woman is on death row for god's sake... either let her get it over with and kill her or leave her be....she's suffering thousands times over like this." Naturally I agree something needs to be done for her...but it seems so extreme... the poor woman is so calm about things because they are out of her control and she is probably just hoping for her D-day to come. So sad...and proves just how archaic out judicial system is....
On that note, I'd just like the say that some town in Oregon still has a law saying you can't roller skate into a public bathroom with an ice cream cone.... color me a perp!

Morgaine Swann wrote:

Kathy, I've never seen anyone as "in their element" as you were at the Gay Porn awards. They loved you! I'm surprised you don't live in a gay neighborhood so you'd be surrounded by fans.

The scenes at the prisons were really touching. We need more programs like they had there. I think most of a person's time in jail should be spent in a classroom so they're less likely to end up there again. You were so brave to go in there - I know I couldn't do it.

Brian Peeler wrote:

I LOST MY BEST FRIEND. It seems as if we both lost someone very close to us this season on our shows. I get 500 emails a day with people saying they are sorry to hear about Doug. So I am going to do the same to you I am so sorry to hear about you dad. I am also glad to see your show is doing well. I wish I could have got a chane to talk to you when you came to our gym to train with Jackie. My wife and her mother are very big fans of yours. Oh yeah I am too :D just pulling your chain. I know you have a trainer but if you are ever in need of another one let me know. I am sure we would have a blast and kick you ass. LOL Anyway I am just glad to see you are
doing well. Hit me up at peelerbilt@yahoo.com if you ever want to train.

Katz wrote:

K, coming to Charlotte, NC anytime? Love to have ya.

Martin wrote:

What was the name of the drunk porn star? He looked interesting!

Judy wrote:

Love your show!!!! I look forward to Tuesday nights to watch your adventures on the D-list. I thought the episode going to perform to the prison was very heart felt and compassionate. You are very funny and genuine. You seemed to surround yourself with wonderful caring people who know how to have fun and care about you. For some one who claims to live on the D-list (as a negative), who wants to be on the A-list of the self-serving and self-absorb narcisists. You deserve the best. Keep up the humor. Keep it real. ;-)

Kimberly Blair wrote:

Kathy, you're the red-headed goddess this world has been waiting for.

Sandy Green wrote:

Kathy!! You're coming to Fort Worth, TX July 21st and me and my friends are SO excited about getting to finally see you live. We have a very special gift to present to you (nothin freaky or weird but something I believe will just tickle you pink!) I emailed specifics to the contact page of your official website. Sure do hope you'll read it and get back to me! Sincerely, a devoted fan of Kathy and her empire!

Kris P wrote:

Hey kathy,

i bet hosting the Gay Porn awards was amazin...
even tho you were a lil....TARDY..haha...
but your coming to San Antonio a week from today and i cant wait...:-)

im planning on bein one of your main gays... but from what i understand, your show is already sold out...good for you!! bad for me...haha...i went to buy my tickets from "ticketmaster" and there werent any available....looks like i'll be watching it from the T.V. in a few months... :-(

but i hope you do GREAT!!
and dont worry bout the audience, its not too hard to make a gay texan laugh...TRUST ME...LOL....

Chris wrote:

Hello fellow red head! I just had to comment on how funny (ironic?) it was that you had Mike the Mouth on the same episode as your prison visit. Inmate to poker professional to Kathy dis-ee! LMAO!

Aaron Folse wrote:

Kath,

Have great tickets to see you in Houston in a few weeks! Girl, let me tell ya, had a lumbar laminectomy on July 2, so I'll be in a torso brace (ok, it's a corsit!) but my ass will be there! Will you be around to take pictures after the show and sign Kathy Goods?

Jos wrote:

Hi Kathy! First of all, I woiuld like to tell you that I'm the one that has been stealing your gay porn. I figured that i needed it more than you. But in my defense, I'm sharing with Sanjaya as you suspected! Second, was overly excited that you are coming to perform in El Paso, I nearly pissed myself like an overly excited puppy! Sadly I won't be able to make it! (TEARS) Hope it turns out a success. I rememer in one of your episodes your were waiting for a baby to ask you how your day was, well my 4 month old son almost has it down! My brother and I are big fans, He won't stop bothering until I ask you if you could send some tickets. Best of luck.

jakey wrote:

I think it's really cool that you talked to Paul Rodriguez before going to the prisons, just like you talked to the Work Out lady about lesbians and Whoopi about Carnegie Hall. It's little scenes like this that show how seriously you actually take your work! Stay fly!

Rick wrote:

Hey Kathy:

Just a shot out to tell you how much we love you show; you are too crazy girl! Thanks for keeping us entertained.

Do you want to attend my annual Embalmer's BBQ? (Yes, I'm a funeral director who runs a mortuary school) We'll have a blast. Indiana funeral directors would love to hear about your pesche(sp?).

Love ya:

Rick

Jenny K wrote:

Kathy,
I've been watching your show since the first episode and except for when I've seen you live, I have NEVER laughed so hard at your antics as I did during your most recent episode. Gay Porn Awards, two prison performances---it just doesn't get any better than that. Only you could handle both so well!
Looking forward to your next Chicago-area appearance. Keep it up, girl!

M. wrote:

K-Red:
1. The View - Those broads are overwhelmingly oppressive and I just don't see them appreciating your humor. You'd let "peesch" (sp?) slip one time and BW would have a friggin' coronary. Unless they're willing to give you a buttload of money, just stick with the guest host gig. Let Nathan Lane sit in with those biddies day to day.
2. Love the show. It's easy to get caught up in it! Your face and body language gets so animated when you get tickled.

Nicholas Cerf wrote:

Hi kathy
My name is Nick, I am a big fan!! I am 15 years old and my mom loves you. In my opinion you belong on the A list
Love Nick

Juan G wrote:

HI Kathy!
I wouldn't be the first to say that I'm a big fan of your reality show!
It is exciting that you will be in San Antonio! Just wanted to let you know if you want to hang out with some of your gays before or after your show while in San Antonio...come out to Candlelight coffeehouse, wine bar and cafe.
I'm sure that at least half of our patrons will be either on their way to your show or stop by afterwards.

Carrie E. wrote:

Hey Kathy!!!

I just wanted to tell you that I think you are so fantastic, beautiful and funny. I can't get enough of your show! My husband is in the Navy, and he is gone a lot of the time. When he's gone, I watch re-runs of your show and it always makes me smile and feel like things aren't that bad. You may call yourself a "D-Lister", but myself and all of your fans think of you as beyond an "A-Lister." Keep doing what you are doing, you make the world funnier place. I love you!!!

Carrie, Honolulu HI

laxmi wrote:

hi Kathy,
First, I wanted to express my condolences for your father's passing. It takes a lot of courage to get out there and work so soon after a heavy hit like that. You are a true professional in your field, girl. I love watching your show and I've also got my sweety hooked on it. Keep those "alleged" stories coming, too, we can't get enough! You rock!!!

Dawn wrote:

I just saw the gay porn awards/prisoner episode and I must admit I think it's amazing how you can adapt your material to meet your audience. You totally could've been a litigator! Anyway, thanks for entertaining me too-- I've been laid up in bed (not in that way!) for 5 days now due to a freak surfing accident and really look forward to your show. It's even better when the vicodin kicks in which I didn't think could happen. ;)

Clinton Rolbiecki wrote:

Well, I really must thank you for fulfilling one of my fantasies... Though it was not quite as I imagined, it will do just fine.

I received many phone calls that I was on your show. Pretty much a half second of snapping your picture with my camera phone.

I was quite pleased to also see that I was in a show with porn stars... Again, not quite as I imagined the fantasy, but thanks non the less.

I was quite impressed with the human element of your show, most specifically the prison portion. I was a fan before, but now, after seeing so much depth in you, I am more so.

Thanks for the D list.

Humbly yours.

Clinton Rolbiecki
Newark, CA

kelly wrote:

Hi Kathy,
Love your show I never miss it.I think your on the a-list.I been watching you on tv for years.theirs alot of stars that shouldn,t
be on the a-list.but you know who they are ? LOL! Icouldn't get tickets to see yoyu up at hampton beach club .Wish i did but didn''t find out u would be there until to late.unless you can get me some please. well goto go bye talk to u soon.keep making me laugh

Morgaine Swann wrote:

Kathy, I've never seen anyone as "in their element" as you were at the Gay Porn awards. They loved you! I'm surprised you don't live in a gay neighborhood so you'd be surrounded by fans.

The scenes at the prisons were really touching. We need more programs like they had there. I think most of a person's time in jail should be spent in a classroom so they're less likely to end up there again. You were so brave to go in there - I know I couldn't do it.

Gloria Vega wrote:

Kathy,just to let you know that your July show in Fort Worth[not Dallas] sold out in less than half a day. Girl stay out of those backward places where people look
shocked when they hear you talk.
You think they had never heard or seen a penis.curse words etc. We love the hell out of you in Fort Worth and I know you will always
peform to a packed house.Do not
change a thing about your shows.
You are the greatest.Oh yes a little
motherly advice,quit dating losers!
Kathy I love,love your Bravo shows
I have seen some of them at least
20 times.{Bravo give her a raise!}

michael wrote:

Ms. Griffin,

Love you and the show. Your continuous charity and kindness certainly equal out your distaste for children! jk. ;)

Love, michael

Cindie wrote:

What do you do when you need a laugh? (laugh at yourself?) NOT! I love to watch your show for the 'laugh' that I get from watching you, not only performing, but just being you (I suppose you're just being you)...As for Matt? He's 'not' your cup of tea, but you already knew that I think. You need someone to match the class that you have ... perhaps that person would be....ok I'll save that thought till next time. :-) Have a great day. How's your mom? She seems a tiny bit spacey...I think she feels lost (which is common for having been married so long). Just concerned. Ta ta for now.

jana wrote:

Just found out you'll be in my town in October. I am so there! You crack me the hell up, and I really do hope you start each 'company meeting' waving a two-headed dildo. Now that is where i want to work!

Aimee wrote:

Hey Kathy,
you should get rid of Tom and let me be your new tour manager, i could get you at least on the c list but you'd have a good shot at the b list. Tom needs to get you better gigs and more promoting. If you'd like someone who could further your career let me kow. I enjoy your show and your acts are hilarious. Thanks!

Pinayoki wrote:

Kathy, come to Delaware, please!! You're superb!

michelle wrote:

kathy, i love your humor, you are so funny. i dont understand why you are on the d-list. i always hear the saying if people get mad about what you say about them, a part of it is true? if you ever come to houston texas to do a show i will be there.

Sir Reames wrote:

OMG! I love your show Kathy! U rocked the gay porn awards. I am one of your gays. I may be 15 ut i have the mind of a 36 year old. I'm glad that you try an give back to the community. I also hate children too, even though all I have is a 5 year old sister. Keep doing what your doing, and I'll keep watching your show.

patty wrote:

Dear, Kathy I'll make it short and sweet; I care about you ! From my heart I say no amount of money or fame is worth selling your soul: So I ask that you rethink the path that you are on. I add that even if no one in this dog eat dog world likes you Jesus will always LOVE YOU ! eternity is a long time
Just something you might want to ponder about during maybe a sleepless night or at a momment that the lonely feeling creeps in on you, because in reality your not alone.
Sincerely, Patty

Tricia Paluszynski wrote:

Kathy,

I think you are the most hilarious comedian out there! I avidly watch your show and, no, I'm not gay. I am very sorry to hear about your father and cried with you while watching that episode. As for Mike... well, as you said, he' straight... not much else to say there. You are so much better than those A listers out there that you are in a class of your own. Love ya and can't wait for more laughs!

LISA wrote:

KATHY,
You are hilarious!! you remind me of a cousin that I have that lives in Chicago and can't find a decent guy either. She has the same sense of hunor as you. I live close to Peoria,il--are you going to be anywhere close to hewre in the future? My husband and I would love to catch your show. Keep up the good work and we'll keep watching!
Lisa
Benson,IL

LISA wrote:

KATHY,
You are hilarious!! you remind me of a cousin that I have that lives in Chicago and can't find a decent guy either. She has the same sense of hunor as you. I live close to Peoria,il--are you going to be anywhere close to hewre in the future? My husband and I would love to catch your show. Keep up the good work and we'll keep watching!
Lisa
Benson,IL

Dani wrote:

Hi Kathy! I LOVE your reality show and your stand up performances. I have to ask, are you always so high energy and funny? Man I don't see how you do it. Also how do you keep so thin? You look great! Love ya girl. If you ever come to the sticks in Mississippi, I would love to see your show.
Take Care!!!!

Jay wrote:

Hi Kathy,

I would like to say how much I & my partner enjoy watching your show every night and even watching repeats of each episode. We think you deserve a top
spot on that A-list, but you are all above them. Thank
you so much for being so honest & straight forward.
Also your great support for the gay/lesbian community.
Have a wonderful season.

Your Fans,
Jay & MT

Tiffany wrote:

ok. i sware i'm not a stalker! But i just sent you email and just in case u see this before hand...please read my message! I love ur show and think your great. And try to visit my brother...laughter truly is the best medicine! He needs it!

Domenick wrote:

OMG You are so amazing I just wanted to tell you Kathy. So Fantabulous. Muah!

Christina wrote:

Kathy
Just want to tell you i love your show i watch it every day!! You really need to go to Denver Colorado to perform so i can see you! Oh and by the way Tom is sooooo hot!

deb wrote:

Hi Kathy!

no one makes me laugh like you do- when i've had a bad day i turn on bravo to hopefully find you on and you instantly make me laugh- everything about you is hysterical- your mannerisms and facial expressions crack me up!! my friends and i all love you- we live in connecticut and hope to see you some day!

take care
deb
:)

sandykay wrote:

Hi, I don't know if Kathy will ever read this but went through alot of work just to get to this page,not good at computers,and what is a url?Anyway,if you are reading this Kathy I just wanted you to know how much I love your show and what it means to me.I have a bad heart,and alot of the time I feel like crap,but on days when it seems no-one can get a smile out of me when i'm feeling bad,your show will come up while i'm channel surfing,or I will look for it.As soon as it's on it only takes a few min.,and i find myself laughing outloud and smiling,my boyfreind will come in the room and see if i'm ok due to the fact he doesn't get to see or hear that from me very often.He says he wishes you could be on 24 hrs just to see me laugh.I was very sorry about your father,my father passed of the same thing two years ago,ironicaly,I also am in congestive heart failure,at 38,but it's under controll rt now.I just wanted you to know I think you are one of the funniest people ive seen,i actually used to act alot like you before i lost energy,but please keep doing what your doing,you effect people more than you know,hope you do see this.
THANKS 4 THE LAUGHS,

sandy kay!

daynuh wrote:

hey kathy, hows it goin? well actually i kind of know since i watch ur show like 24/7. i love it, ur HILARIOUS!!! anyway, funny blog but what i really wanted to say is i think u and tom should go on a date. i think he likes u.

Daynuh wrote:

Hey Kathy, how's it goin'? Well actually, I already kind of know that answer since I watch your show. It's one of my favorite shows besides X-Files. The one you were in was good, I liked it a lot. Gillian Anderson is CRAZY, isn't she? David Ducvony, Gillian Anderson, and you are my three favorite actor/ actresses. You're HILARIOUS! keep up the good work.

Bradley wrote:

hey kathy! you probably don't even read these, but oh well :(. I think you're really sweet, despite tormenting yourself with loser guys. it's time to raise the stakes kathy. yeah, you know what I'm talking about, not really, but yeah jack nicholson. I know; I know; he's old, but so what. it's not like you have to change his diapers; I'm sure that he gets someone to do that for him, and it might even be sexy if you did. did you see "something's gotta give"? the charm level was through the roof in that movie. ok, well, if you don't want to gamble (even though you did with matusow), I think you should try out tom, or he could be your pretend boyfriend for when you go to events and parties. and on the plus side, you'll get the pleasure of dumping him if it doesn't workout. I'm j/k; he's a sweet guy. also, I was reading jessica's blog; I had no idea that she is a new ager! that's cool. you should do stuff with her like meditation and stuff. y'all could even arrange your furniture in your house according to feng shui!

anyway, sorry the post is so long. goodluck in your life!

Susan wrote:

You are so funny!! Down to earth - just like a midwestern should be (as am I). I love your staff and your family - can I apply for a job with you or does Tiffany need an assistant? Your episode about your father touched my heart as my father (and mother as well) have passed away and you are so sweet to both of them. I hope you meet a fantastic man in your life and totally forget about Matt!! Definitely sounded like he was using you. Keep your spirit, your vulnerability and love your jokes.
P. S. I have great administrative skills.
Susan

Jeffrey wrote:

Hey Kathy,

I can always count on you for a laugh... You are truely the funniest person on Television. Others are ha ha funny, but you are "LAUGH OUT LOUD, LAUGH MY ASS OFF" funny... I hang on to every word that comes out of you mouth.... KEEP THE LAUGHS COMING. Oh, btw, I saw you in LA last year.. You are too much!!!

Jeffrey
San Francisco

tina m wrote:

YOU ARE FRIGGIN HYSTERICAL! I just saw you last night (Sat. 7/14) at the Cape Cod Melody tent. It was my first time ever seeing you in the flesh and I've got to say you are just a friggin riot! I LOVE your style. Would LOVE to see your show again!! Maybe next time your out our way the friggin fans will work so you don't die of heat exhaustion! LOVE YA! Your the best!
Tina M.--an itty bitty town south of boston

Nicole wrote:

Hey Kathy!! that must've been some trip hosting the gay porn awards, huh?
Anyway, I found out you're coming to New Mexico soon. I want to go, but alas, I'm broke! (being 17 with no job may have something to do with that, huh??)

It'd be great to get to see you live, since you are such a kick-ass comedian, but....yea.

Can't wait for the new episode!!!
--..--..--

debbie wrote:

hey you....kath i watch you all the time and think you are totally on the a list. My daughter is 11 and she watches you with me...we laugh so hard, she does have questions from time to time, but all in all....she gets it....love and KEEP ROCKIN GIRL!!!

Nettie Amaya wrote:

May I just say I think you are totally GREAT you are so funny and you do comedy about the truth and that,s awesome. I hope your show stay,s on forever cause I will keep watching.

Frank wrote:

Kathy
I was there at the Gay Porn Awards back in February.I so wanted to meet you but I had no idea you were in the Castro before the event.You were so funny,there were parts in your act that werent shown on Bravo like Britney and Paula Abdul.Even when you made a reference to the ice throwing incident from last year,the crowd roared into applause.That was an inside joke but appropriate.I got VIP tickets thinking I could get into the afterparty afterwards.I ended up at the VIP bar getting photos with the guys including Erik Rhodes,the hottie who took his shirt off.I had a great time later that night,afterparty or not.

alicia wrote:

Kathy!
You freakin rock! You are so damn funny! I just wanted to let you know I love your show & people who don't get it and can't tolerate the swearing can go shove it! Keep up the good work and you are already on the A List for all your fans...screw the rest of those hollywood idiots.

mary ellen wrote:

first Nick Carter then Mike the Mouth, and then Ron Jeremy.
Sure that it is too soon, for you really to be into real dating.
So you are just looking for what will make good tv, you did say that you were looking for men to get photographed with?
well your choices are terrible, so then you must be looking for what will make great tv???
Well then come on, there are way better single men in la. that would lov to be phontographed and on your show way better than those losers. come on kathy, Ron Jeremy, the thought is going to give me nightmares.
well good luck and you deserve alot better even if they are only for entertainment purposes. lol

Lisa Ciosek wrote:

Oh- I have to know what dress you were wearing for the Gay Porn awards. It was just so freaking cute!!! You looked amazing!
Lisa

shawn wrote:

I'm not sure if you have but you should do a show in Maryland just because you are an awesome person

UFO Chaser Melissa wrote:

Hi, Kathy. Boys are so dumb. Especially when they are playing poker!!!

Maybe you should "go gay" on everyone for a week on your show and have a date with Ellen DeGeneres, she can give you an inside glimpse of a first date - lesbian style. Or wait... is she in a partnership with someone? I dunno, but that doesn't matter, in fact, THAT makes it better! Or maybe one of those chicks from Queer as Folk, but I don't think they are lesbians in real life... I don't think that matters either, though.

Think about it. You can be LUNSA. HA! :)

robin krebs wrote:

You are the funniest woman on the planet. Thanks for being here to make my life a little easier with laughter. (the BEST medicine!)

Debaser wrote:

Hey Kathy just want to say that your show has been better than ever this season. Reality TV is so wonderfully contrived and scripted but your really showed a raw side. I hope you win the emmy this year because you deserve it those bastards from Extreme Homemakeover just exploit crippled kids for ratings, although you can't help but cry when they move the bus. I ran into you a hundred years ago when you were doing an FX show with HANSON on the sidewalk, i was like 11 years old and thought you were the coolest ever for signing an autograph where you spelled my name wrong. Then it read "I'm retarded Love Kathy Griffin" You're awsome COME TO NEW YORK I want to see your stand up without travelling hours to PUrchase college

Grace wrote:

Kathy - you are the funniest person on the planet. I've had an idea - have you seen the TV show where they are looking for the funniest stand-up comic IN THE WORLD!!!!! I think it's called 'Last Comic Standing'. Okay - you have to do a segment on your show where you try to get on THAT SHOW. How hysterical would that be. You could go in disguise. Of course, you are already the funniest comic in the world so you would win handsdown:)

Grace

carina chapin wrote:

Hey Girlfriend! let me just tell you that strip poker is the fastest way to get some! Unfortunately he isn't that cute. heheh.. Anyway, loved the fact that you went overseas to visit our troups. I think you should stop in on a stateside base - MCCAGC - Twentynine Palms, CA. We are stationed here on the largest and best USMC base who trains all those guys that are in Iraq. We even have standup nights at the club on base. I think your visit would be greatly appriciated. I can even hook you up in the best Inn in the high desert.

Tanya Morgan wrote:

Kathy,

You seem like a great person and I love your personality. Come to Baltimore and I will take you out on the town so you can party.

Sincerely ,
Tanya

Lee wrote:

I think you are so great!! I love to watch your show!! You make me laugh the whole time!!! You are so talented!!!! Thanks for all you do!! You are on my A list!!!!

andrew chipman wrote:

Hi Kathy,I'm a 29 year old male from Miami,fl.I enjoy watching your progarm because of the fact your are a straight up person(not to mention very-cute for someone of your age)and quite funny.All I want to know is,what is your obsession about about gays?Well..I hope hope you have a more sucessful career.Trust me,if I weren't married and on the wasc on the single market and plus a really famous person,I would date you and make you more famous but I'm just your average"Joe"(plus a little handicapped) that doesn't have the celebrity status that you need.May God bless you to have the best success in your life.....love your show because I watch it every time catch it.

Jeff Von D wrote:

Why the hell do you have to drag all your "staff" with you everywhere??
Perhaps you can now see how much crap you expected Matt to do for you.
Be a big girl and apologize to him. If you have the balls...

Caitlin wrote:

Hey Kathy!
I can't wait till the 27th!That's when you'll be in Lafayette and I'm doing everything I can to get tickets!Hope to be there.

Kaz wrote:

Dear Kathy,
I wanted to send you my condolences for the loss of your father. I too lost my father (2 years ago) to pancreatic cancer after a 14 month battle with it. I started watching your show this season and I love it so far! I don't understand why you meet so many guys that don't treat you like your on the A-list. I absolutely love your humor and outlook on life. If I ever come out to LA , May I have the pleasure of taking you out to dinner? I could use a good joint laugh instead of always making other people laugh. Keep the memory of your Dad alive....he's always with you.

All my best,
Kaz

kim wrote:

I would like to know who that dress is by! I love the dress Kathy hosted the GayVN awards in...fabulous!

kim wrote:

I would like to know who that black and silver dress is made by! I love it and I would seriously like to have one.

BTW Kathy when you come back to Michigan stick to the Detroit area. We love you and we will actually BUY tickets!

I'm crazy about your show...keep up the great work and don't let anyone f****** intimidate you! Well-behaved women rarely make history!
Kim

Becky Hardee wrote:

Kathy Oh Kathy!!!

You are hilarious!!! I love your sense of humor and your show! So, keep it up!! Now the only thing you need to do is to come to these here parts of the country so my friends and I can come see a live show! Cause that would be awesome! LATER!

Victoria Embrey wrote:

Kathy, you are so funny. I especially enjoyed your stand-up when you were trying to talk your mom into going on the Lesbian cruise. I almost fell off my sofa laughing. If I am lucky enough to see you in Wash. D.C. this September I would love to here you talk about Paula Abdule. Paula seems like a wonderful person but her show is good material! Anyway take good care of yourself during your tour. Don't get burned out...I need your commedy!Victoria

Sandy Bernstein wrote:

Hi Kathy,
I'm 50 and I absolutely love your show. Of course, I would love your fantastic Mom to be featured a bit more.....she's a great lady. I lost my beloved Mom last year, so cherish yours. My son, who is 23 and straight, loves your show and commented to me that he thinks your assistant, the blonde one, is really cute. Hey, he's single........how 'bout we hook those two up? He's a frequent LA visitor. How 'bout a blind date for them at a nice Jewish deli like Nate 'N Al's? You can even feature it on your show next season. Have your peeps call my peeps. C'mon, you've got chutzpah!

Annette Gallagher wrote:

The prison scenes were so touching -- good for you for giving those people something to smile about for a little while. The woman on death row just killed me -- pardon the bad pun. I almost cried right along with you at the stories from those women!!!

RAUL MELENDEZ wrote:

HEY KATHY!!! I LOVE YOUR SHOW. IT'S REALLY FUNNY & FASCINATING TO ME WHEN I SIT ON THE COUCH TO SEE YA’ I JUST START TO TRIP GIRL. BY THE WAY, CONGRATS! FOR DOING GREAT IN LONDON. JAJAJ(LOL)JAJA OH MY GOD. I JUST REMEMBERED WHEN YOU HIT YOURSELF WITH A BRANCH ON THOSE BUSES. TAKE CARE LOVE YA

CALEXICO,CA 92231
THIS TOWN DOES EXIST!
SOMEWHERE.

Ugena Whitlock wrote:

I just wanted to say how sorry about the passing of Kathy's father. We are all in a way sidkick's in our parent's shows, aren't we, and I think it's just amazing how Kathy shows her appreciation for her folks in every show. Mr. Griffin was a delightful man, and the show will be lacking a little whimsy now that he is gone.

Marcel wrote:

Did a lot of the GayVN stuff get cut? I wanted to see more hot porn stars. Bravo teased us with that one buff guy who went upstage. But that was all the meat in the episode (I wasn't into the prisoners - but kudos to Kathy for "killing" in the prison). I should just go rent a goddamn porn flick.

sharon wrote:

Hey Kathy!
Hello from Tracy CA, and thanks for hiring Tiffany to put us on the map!
I have watched all of the episodes now on Bravo at least 4 times. I always enjoy it, and pick up on something I missed the first or second time. Yours is such classic humor.
A favorite episode boy that's hard for me to pick. I have favorites pieces in all of them. You were doing the episode at the prison tonight, and I was busy cooking dinner and all of a sudden heard my husband bust up. Until then he wouldjust ask me "are you watching her again?" Well this evening he said, "good for her, she seems to be doing better since her Dad passed away." I had no idea he even knew what went on!
When Mike was speaking with your Mom before your date. He was yelling at the TV! "DUDE! You fool that's her MOTHER!!"
So whether you know it or not, your humor makes its way into many of our lives. Thanks for sharing your life, and your company's day to day humor with us!
Need some material? I'm surprised that Millie hasn't sent you the Tracy Press newspaper with the Police Blotter circled.
David Letterman mentioned us one night. Get her to send it to you it's so funny!
Take Care!
Sharon

Natalie wrote:

I suffer from extreme Paddy fro (curly Irish hair that only straightens under extreme measures by persnickety hairdressers). I noticed in this particular episode you had some kind of hair straightening blowdrying gizmo and I wanted to know A. if it works and B. if it does what it is and where can I get it? In general I must give you a big shout out for being open about your publicity whoring ways and your always refreshing and hilarious digs at celebrities. I suspect you will be on the C list in know time girly!

Shane wrote:

You are the Goddess of Funny! You are the Queen of the Gay People! Every show is So Groovey Awesome! I hope to meet you one day, and get your autograph tattooed on my bum! lol just kidding...or am i? ~wink~
Keep Rocken it Hard gurl! To me you are A++ list to me!
love ya gurl!!

john agresta wrote:

Kathy, im so excited got tickets for your show at the fox in atlanta for tomorrow aug 17th..im a flight attendant on disability right now...i severed my achille tendon in the bathtub 4 weeks ago(uh uh , dont ask) and had an oepration abut 3 weeks ago, im still wearing a foot boot cast and crutches, but honey there was nothing that was going to stop me from seeing you LIVE.. Love your comedy...so whats the chances of being pitied(is that a word) and get a chanc to meet you..my friends bought me the ticked for my birthday ans supposedly its pretty good seats...well hey i just figured i'd tried, i have been bored out of my mind thye last month with nothing to do but keep my leg up, and thats without involving having sex..DAAM IT....i blabbed enough..thanks john

marilyn armstrong wrote:

I love ya. Just got tickets to your show in Santa Rosa..Oct 26 07. Me, my friend of 60+ years Hazel,and our gay friend Blaine. See you then. Marilyn.

Brittany wrote:

Kathy!!!!
OMG. You are the funniest person ever! I watch all of your standup and your show, and no matter how many times I have seen it, you still make me laugh. I can sympathize with D-List life, cause I lived there my senior year in high school. I also think its really great how you had your mom move in with you. At the college I attend (University of Toledo in Ohio) I am on the campus activities planning board, and it would be awesome if you would come- of course it is just in the works.
But I just wanted to tell you how awesome you are, and thanks for saying all of the things everyone else is too much of a pussy to say, including myself!

Brenda wrote:

aw you should have just jumped him. why the hell not have a sip of your mom's liquid courage and jump on him. But then I might not be the best authority about these things. What ever happened to Waz? The Apple co-founder guy? I thought he was a cutie patootie and he maybe a bit geeky but he seemed genuinly sweet. Somtimes good things come in small,round,BILLIONAIRE bite size packages...

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