It’s an unforgettable moment when the person you’re madly in love with decides to get down on one knee, ramble off a homemade love poem, pull out a shiny diamond ring, and ask you to spend your life with them. It’s filled with tears, bottles of champagne, and social media posts that’ll get you more likes than you have ever gotten before.
But even before that moment happens, there’s a point in time when the person who is about to pop the question has to decide if and when they are going to do it. Sometimes, the person is scared beyond belief, whether because they hope you say yes or because they just aren’t ready to commit to one person for life.
Check out these tales from guys in relationships who are terrified to propose.
1. I don’t want things to change
“I hear people say all the time that marriage changes everything and right now I’m really happy with my girl and our relationship. The last time I want to do is complicate it by putting a diamond ring on her finger and then having to figure out where we are going to live and how many kids we are going to have and how to properly combine our finances. It makes good change to ugly real fast.” – Christopher B., 29
2. I’m unsure if she’s the one
“I’ll be blunt and honest here, I don’t know if I am dating “the one”. That’s a term we grow up thinking we know what it means. But do we really? What does “the one” really mean? I guess IMO, it means someone you put up with and enjoy their company and trust and respect a lot. My girlfriend is great, don’t get me wrong, but can I see myself waking up next to her and dealing with her every day for the rest of our lives? I’m not sure.” – Tyson W., 31
3. It means I’m one and done
“I love my girlfriend a lot and want to marry her, but I also don’t want to give up my freedom to potentially meet someone else. I’ve never cheated or anything like that. But in my mind, getting married means that you are one and done. At least now, just dating, it’s a bit easier to leave if I wanted to or found someone else. I’m a guy and I feel like that’s normal. Our eyes are always looking for what’s next, even though we love the one we are with.” – Max F, 30
4. I’m not ready for real life
“First comes love, then comes marriage, and then comes a baby. I’m not ready for any of that. I’m still in my twenties. Isn’t this the time when I’m supposed to just have wild fun and not think about diapers and getting a mortgage? I wish I could propose now, cause I really do love her, but then not actually get married for two to three, or even four, years.” – Rick F., 26
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