Fashion’s been flirting with ugly shoes for years now (case in point: bloggers in Birkenstocks), but now Christopher Kane’s really done it. For Kane’s London Fashion Week show, models stomped down the runway wearing leopard print coats, safety-pinned cardigans, sheer dresses, and honest-to-God Crocs. The designer worked in collaboration with the lowly foam clog brand to create a designer Croc, jazzing the shoes up with a marble print and crystal charms.
Does this mean Crocs are about to be in? That’s very disturbing, but they weren’t the only ugly shoes on the runway this month. The athleisure trend is also ushering in strange sock-sneaker hybrids, Ugg collabs, and high-heeled Tevas knock-offs. See those and more of the most hideous designer shoes for spring, ranked in order of ugliness.
10. Pyer Moss at New York Fashion Week
“No, I did not step in paint on the way over here. These are my oxfords that serve as a metaphor for the anchors ‘that we all face in life," designer Pyer Moss told Vogue.
9. Thom Browne at New York Fashion Week
8. Yeezy at New York Fashion Week
From the mind of Kanye West springs Yeezy Season 4 clear plastic Saran Wrap-esque thigh-high boots. Kim Kardashian West already demonstrated how to wear said boots: With a trucker denim jacket, mom jorts, and a bra sans shirt, apparently.
7. Salvatore Ferragamo at Milan Fashion Week
6. Fendi at Milan Fashion Week
Yet somehow, Fendi made literal “sock booties” that are even more offensive to the eye.
5. Hood By Air at New York Fashion Week
We’re not sure if these cowboy boots from Hood By Air’s hipper-than-thou designer Shayne Oliver are coming or going, but they look downright impossible to walk in either way.
4. Preen at London Fashion Week
Preen paired bow-emblazoned platform sandals with frilly socks, and the end effect made it look like ruffles had eaten the models’ feet. Maybe we shouldn’t be surprised that these flatforms are in collaboration with Ugg, purveyor of an all-time classic ugly shoe.
3. ThreeAsFour at New York Fashion Week
At this rate, someone’s going to make a high fashion spin on those horrendous Vibram FiveFinger running shoes… OH WAIT, TOO LATE! NYC designers ThreeAsFour actually collaborated with Vibram for spring, sending ballet flat versions of the shoes with ankle straps down the runway.
2. Versace at Milan Fashion Week
Not even Donatella Versace can make socks and sandals sexy. Especially not chunky socks paired with a riff on flatform Tevas — one of many Teva-esque heels Versace has in store with its athleisure-heavy spring collection.
1. Christopher Kane at London Fashion Week
British designer Christopher Kane’s collab with Crocs will actually be produced and sold, according to Footwear News, though there’s no word yet on how much designer Crocs embellished with raw gems will cost.
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