Don't get any funny ideas, Mauricio, but Kyle Richards doesn't believe cheating is a one-and-done marital dealbreaker.
"If you cheat once, don't tell. You get a free pass," the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star writes in her new book, Life Is Not a Reality Show: Keeping It Real With The Housewife Who Does It All.
(Check out an excerpt from Kyle's new book.)
Say what, Kyle? Care to explain? "I've seen circumstances with people that I know are in love with their spouse and they made one mistake. I said…'Listen, if this really was a onetime mistake, and you did not put this person in jeopardy, I personally think you should deal with it with yourself and with God," Mrs. Umansky explained on Good Morning America. "I knew that this would ruin their relationship and their life. And I can tell you that many, many, many years later they're happy and together and she did make that mistake and she has to carry that and live with that."
Not surprisingly, Kyle's facing a few opponents in the cheat sheet ring. "That is horrible advice! I love Kyle! WTF. I am a warrior against cheating; it doesn't make sense if ur in love," one fan tweeted to the new author, who replied, "I would never. That is an example of a friend that was in that situation. Can't explain via Twitter."
Do you agree with Kyle's second chance rationale? Start a Tweet Battle, and make your case.
I swear I'm losing my mind reading these comments. I am a therapist who specializes in couples work. NO, you do not keep it a secret! The point of marriage is that both people have equal say in what they will and will not accept in the marriage. When one partner breaks the agreement, the other person absolutely has the right to decide if they want to stay. No one person has the right to decide that for another to save their own skin. Marriage isn't always pretty but it needs to remain honest. Otherwise it's not a true marriage and negates the true sanctity of it.
I think this advice makes sense. She is not condoning it. She is saying that if someone made one bad choice and felt appropriately horrible and then decided not to put self in that position ever again - why destroy a family over it? Why make someone you love feel terrible for years over one mistake? This free pass is one pass only. It is not saying it is okay, and it not for a pattern of behavior. It is for the few who feel truly remorseful and have taken stock of how and why it happened so it does not occur again. (And no, I've never cheated.)
Agreed. I've been on the short end of the cheating stick, and I found out what happened on my own. However, if I had never known and my husband had truly only "slipped" one time, we would be a hell of a lot stronger of a couple than we are right now. The trust issues and concerns I have seem that they will never go away. Regardless, cheating is NEVER something that should happen.
If this was a one time offense that just happened and you know will never happen again, then you are only trying to make your self feel less guily by telling the truth. If you trully love this person keep your mouth shut and make it up to them in other ways .