HBO, Patti Stanger is waiting for your call.
The Millionaire Matchmaker is head over heels for True Blood, and she's ready to get up close and personal with her favorite blood-suckers. Patti took to Twitter, where she said that appearing on the series "would be my dream!" She also rattled off her credentials. "I was on CSI: Miami last night, SNL month before. Thx @NBC, @ABC & @CBS. Now if I could get on @HBO's True Blood..." she tweeted.
OK, so it wasn't exactly her, but Scarlett Johansson's portrayal of Patti on Saturday Night Live made headlines in November. And in case you missed the CSI: Miami episode Patti's referring to, this week's "Match Made in Hell" revolved around a woman who ran a "very exclusive, very respectable" dating service for millionaires. While the CSI matchmaker was a blonde named Tandy King, any fan of Patti knew CBS's inspiration. Their matchmaker was strict with her clients, freely telling women interested in dating her millionaires if their skirts were too short or if their makeup was trashy (sound familiar?).
Don't believe us? Take King's policy on hooking up for some final evidence. Stated a character on the show, "[King] discourages her matches from having sex until they've agreed to enter a committed, monogamous relationship. And that takes a minimum of 90 days."
Or, in Patti's words, "No here, no here, no here."
In the end, the evidence was stacked against CSI's matchmaker, who was found guilty of siccing a killer alligator on a client who didn't pay for her services.
The real Millionaire Matchmaker took to Twitter to comment. Said Patti, "CSI was interesting last night. Not sure I'd kill a client with a gator. Lesson to my clients: you'd better not bounce a check"