"I felt like I was dying inside," she tells People magazine.

on Jul 28, 2011 - The Dish

Taylor Armstrong of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills viewers saw an often chilly relationship between Taylor Armstrong and husband Russell, but now after filing for divorce, Taylor is revealing deeper problems in the marriage, telling People magazine that she faced verbal and physical abuse.

"I felt like I was dying inside," she tells the magazine about those days.

The RHOBH star tells People that the couple argued often, with Russell calling her an "as*hole a lot," and in more heated moments pushing her and pulling her hair. Russell denies the hair pulling allegation, but tells People, "Did I push her? Yes, maybe things happened in the heat of the moment, but it was during a time in our lives that was not characteristic of who we were. This show has literally pushed us to the limit."

Taylor, who grew up in a home filled with domestic violence, tells the magazine, "I knew I had to break the cycle for my daughter's sake." The 40-year-old also confided that she felt "ashamed" this was happening in her relationship because of her strong advocacy for the 1736 Family Crisis Center, a Los Angeles organization that provides support for victims of domestic violence.

As for picking up the pieces and moving forward, Taylor confesses, "I'm scared about the future. I can't even think about dating. First, I need to learn to love myself enough so I don't allow this to happen again."

If you know someone who's involved in a physically or verbally abusive relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE.