This Couple Has a Long-standing Threesome…With Their Marriage Counselor

Every time they need a tune up, she's there. And it's saved them. 

If you’re a couple in crisis, who you gonna call? How about your friendly, neighborhood marriage counselor? That’s what Sharon did back in 1997, just months before she was about to wed her husband Eric.

“We didn’t have a church, and we wanted to work through all those questions you should ask before you get married,” says Sharon, 46.

 The Ohio-based couple found a counselor through the yellow pages and made their initial appointment. They went to her three or four times. “She helped us through some serious questions, like how we were going to raise children,” Sharon says. 

With their minds at ease, they ended their sessions and made their way to the altar. But it wouldn’t be the last time the three would meet up. 

Seven years later, they were back in their counselor’s office, this time working through the dreaded seven-year itch. Sitting on the comfy couch where they had been years before, they were able to jump right in and confront their issues. 

And that’s how it’s been for nearly 20 years. While Sharon and Eric don’t see their marriage counselor on a consistent basis, they know she’s always there and ready to guide them through their matrimonial storms. And that’s a great way to keep your marriage intact, according to dating and relationship expert Fran Greene, author of “The Flirting Bible.” 

“You go to the emergency room when something horrible happens. Sometimes that can be avoided if you go to your doctor for regular preventive care,” Fran declares. “Think of counseling as a prescription for a healthy marriage.”

A third party trained in dealing with relationships, “can help you communicate with your spouse when you two are having problems,” Fran says. 

Or maybe you just need her to help you hash through a grand life decision

Sharon and her husband returned to their counselor again just a few years later. 

“It was when we were contemplating having a third child,” she explains. “It was great to be with someone who knows us so we could get right into it.”

They returned again a few years after that, to deal with a personal family tragedy.

The last time they went, earlier this year, was to help them rediscover their loving selves. “It’s a lot of work with three kids and taking care of our elderly parents, who live with us,” Sharon confesses. “We had been great partners, but lost us.”

Their counselor suggested they find time for themselves every day to reconnect. “We decided that at 10 p.m., we lock our bedroom door for a half hour. We don’t always have sex,” she says with a chuckle. “It’s our private time to watch TV or show each other a funny video. We can do anything and know we’re not going to be interrupted. Now it’s time we look forward to.”

“The best kind of therapist will help you identify what your issues are and give advice on how and what to do in response. It’s a sign of a healthy relationship to seek help before it gets bad,” Fran explains.

She points out that having a marriage counselor throughout your union is not a sign of weakness.  

“It actually shows just how devoted you both are to making this marriage last.”

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