I'm not a lesbian. I'm saying that right now. It just started off with a potential, and now Kathy calls me a 'fakey dyke'.

Here's the truth about what happened... The story is that I met a girl, Heather, on mySpace who I thought was semi-cute and was flirting with me and that was basically it. I told Kathy about it and she made it into this big thing like I was a lesbian. She started talking about my potential lesbian tendencies on stage and then it turned into this whole snowball, which is gonna kill my grandmother. I never met Heather in real life. We spoke on the phone a little bit but I don't like to talk on the phone that much so we would instant message each other. And she happened to be a cute girl. You get girl crushes sometimes and that's all it was. Now, of course, it's in the press.

It's weird being material for Kathy's act because when she first started she would talk about Matt and she always talked about her parents, and the dogs as well.  So now that Matt's gone I kind of slid into his spot -- and I'm ok with it. I love it! It's just weird when people come up to me and say, "Oh you're a lesbian now." I'm like, "No. Damn it Kathy." But it's fun because I know she's saying it with love and just teasing me and I'm okay with that.