Oftentimes, individuals come to see me as a therapist after they have experienced a break-up or divorce. Break-ups can be traumatic. They can lead us to adopt beliefs that keep us in fear, make us feel like we will be alone forever, and lend us thoughts that lead us from one bad relationship to the next. We begin to believe that what we want is not possible and that we are on our own in this world. I know what you are going through I've been where you are. You're not alone.
I have been lied to, cheated on, deceived, coerced, cajoled, tricked, cast aside, seduced, corrupted, convinced, and manipulated. I stayed in my victimhood relationship after relationship, attracting the same kind of men over and over again. All of my princes turned into frogs. I was living in La La Land believing that some day I would find a prince who whould stay a prince, only to be let down time and time again.
That I chose these men, or let them choose me, was not their fault. At the time, I was unable to see the relationships for what they were and my part in them. When enough was enough for me, I decided to allow the Sleeping Beauty within me to wake up and recognize that I had been repeating the same patterns over and over again. The only reason I was living in a romanticized fantasy of what the relationship coulda, shoulda, woulda been. I was driven and bound by my emotions, which distored the reality that kept me off balance. I realized that by living in my victimhood I had been disempowering myself. I felt my gut telling me that there was a way out of feeling the way I did and it was time for me to get it together.