Tonight I TRIED to bring together this group of Ladies to try a type of conflict resolution that we used in my sorority, Alpha Kappa Alpha. This is designed for people who have a relationship “to come together in a private setting and resolve issues that causes sour feelings."
As the names states, we are taking a sour situation and squeezing (or ironing) out our differences with the end result: LEMONADE (sweetness). It usually involves people who have a willing mind and desire to resolve their differences.
Though tonight, I entered the lion’s den with a bunch of Debbie Doubters who felt like my attempt to make peace is already a failure. The mind is a powerful thing so I guess we were already defeated when they entered the door.
I think there are so many other things these doctors and doctor’s wives could be doing rather than bickering. I tried to maintain my peace and did a lot of deep breathing and allowed the disrespectfulness to roll off my back. Their body language screamed, “I don’t want to resolve these issues.” Why am I even trying? I live by the motto, “DO RIGHT BECAUSE IT’S RIGHT!” Yes, I am a Gandhi-like, Mother Teresa who subscribes to this philosophy.
Somehow I am accused of not understanding the pain Mariah is feeling because I have not been pregnant and physically bore a child. This is strange because then every person who has adopted a child or used a surrogate to become a mother wouldn't understand this pain. Where is it written that you have to endure a situation to understand it? I TOTALLY get that there is pain, but what I don’t get is getting stuck in the middle of pain and allowing it to control me so much that I would actually physically attack another. Some of these ladies sitting here have some form of adoption in their lives and to say that adopted or acquired parenting makes the parent unable to understand -- come on give me a break!!!
I will close hoping that conflict resolution takes place and we all can learn to get along or move along and stop making others miserable. I will say there is no way I will allow anything said tonight to steal my joy or take my power. So I’ll end by saying, when there is someone in your presence who is really insignificant in your life, we cannot give them power over us to make us unhappy, to steal our joy or to act in a way that is unbecoming of out of character and who we really are. So I end the episode with a smile on my face and hope that we will one day soon we will all get along.