As we wrap up the first season of #Married2Med, I would like to take a moment to reflect on the roller coaster ride that I just endured for three long months.
This was my first experience on a national TV show. Boy what an experience!
I always believe in life that everything happens for a reason and that reason is for my benefit. However difficult an experience it may be, I always try and find the good in every and all situations.
So, some of the responses that we all received over the season came as a HUGE shock to me. Putting our lives and families under the fiber-optic, HD microscopehould not give people a free reign to slaughter us on Twitter, slam us on Facebook, and give one a carte blanche option to hate. Please try to remember that we are still people, still women, still mothers, daughters, humans, doctors, MDs. You may not agree with us, you may not like all of us, but I ask you to try not to turn it into to hatred. Remember -- for your own sake if not for ours -- in life what you put out comes back to you.
I know I can speak for all us, when I say that these comments are insane, considering the few hours that you really get to know us. What you see in the fishbowl is not the whole person. I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a good and caring friend, an author, and a CFO of two thriving companies. I teach and inspire women with my "business of living" and I work hard for the charities that are close to my heart.
As the only British, Caucasian female on the cast, I particularly got the brunt of things when people mistook my accent, demeanor, humor, or style for being a snob. I am certainly not a snob, and I do not look down on people. That being said I am no wallflower either. I speak my mind, dance to the beat of my own drum, and I consider myself quite unique in my ways, with a sense of humor, a good heart, and good intentions. Not everyone got me this season, but those who did care deeply about the real person that I am.
I found it especially rude and mean the bitter comments from Mariah's mother, saying that I am "fake". It is ironic. Her bitterness was spewed under more fake hair than a Barbie convention, along with her wig and fake walking partner. I may have had a few Botox injections, but I have had far less surgery than Mariah. So once again we are dealing with double standards.
For the entire season I have endured the wrath of Mariah and her family. I cannot help but wonder what the it could have been like for me had I always agreed with her ways, no matter what, as Quad did. I know that Quad was concerned that Mariah considers herself connector of the ladies, as she brought us together, and so Quad worries that speaking out against Mariah will have a negative impact on her. Quad often remarked in her blogs not to "cut off the hand that feeds you." I have to say that I strongly disagree.
I choose to never compromise my values or integrity over money or fame for that matter. The only hand that has ever fed me, since leaving home at the tender age of 17 years, was my own. I paid my way and paid my dues and put food on my own table. But, it does make me think that the #Married2Med journey would have been a much easier one had I not received the sting of the self-proclaimed Queen B.
In life, I choose never to opt for the easy path. Instead I choose the one I see as the correct one. It is often a much harder path and it does not always go the way that you plan for it to go. Everyone makes mistakes and I am not above seeing my own.
I have long since forgiven Mariah for all of the differences that we had during the season. We both made mistakes. I believe I have since owned up to all of mine. I choose not to hold onto negative energy as I want joy and contentment in my life. Life is short and our time is precious. I choose to spend it with those who I love and those who love me. I cannot change others, but I can change me.
I tried over an over to be nice to Mariah, I apologized many times, but when someone is mentally ill, it is hard for them to see things clearly using a broken tool (their mind). I am convinced that she has Paranoid personality disorder (definition here). This is not a joke or a catty put down, I truly believe it is something that she suffers from and should seek help for. It is a real condition with a real diagnosis. I am never able to do anything that she approves of, then entire season she has put me down and insulted me and I am done with it.
I will not be coming to her house so that she can continue to insult me and ridicule me. like she has done many, many times. She hates and it shows it in every scene. If she wants to make peace I am open to it, but I will not be part of another one of her circuses. She has proven over and over that she is not a friend to me. Mariah has NOTHING that I want and I wish her the best in her self proclaimed Queen B role. I have a wonderful successful life and I inspire and teach others on how to have one with my Business of Living. I surround myself with people who bring joy into my world not hate. My friends do not make up lies about me. They do not hate. It is quite simple really to be my friend, just be nice. Peace is easy to make you just have to be willing to forgive.
On that note, I especially want to thank all of the people who have written to me, friended me, shared their stories with me, and spoken words of kindness and encouragement to me. Thank you for the many gifts I have received, as well as the thoughts and prayers. I am going to be on the road promoting my children's book The Pink Monkey and continuing with my "Girl Swag" and speaking engagements. For more info follow me here.
This season has come to its conclusion. It has been a wonderful experience getting to know all of you. I am not sure if I will always share my stories, or continue to share my life, but I will always continue to be Married to Medicine.