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Toya Has Empathy for Quad

Toya knows that the devil only changes his clothes after seeing how Mariah treated Quad. 

By Toya Bush-Harris

The WEN conference proved to be a very powerful and uplifting experience. It was a day to celebrate and empower women in the spirit of positivity, while creating an environment for the expansion of networking amongst women. It wasn't really the forum for what went on between Quad and Mariah.

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Though the WEN conference was meant to provide a space for tranquility, it seemed only to provide fuel to ignite the flames for what was happening between Quad and Mariah. And so the argument continued. . .

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"She's not worthy. . .I won't let her take me back there. Young Roach and Little Ms. Quad."

Mariah, then speaking in third person (and past tense). . .

"Mariah will not be hugging Quad today."

Didn't I warn you that THE DEVIL ONLY CHANGES HIS OUTFITS?

Even Heavenly's divine namesake couldn’t convince Quad and Mariah to just forgive. With Quad saying, "THIS IS MY LIFE!" 

. . .took me back to a scene from The Color Purple.

When are we going to get to the point where we stop keeping score? Stop tallying up who has hurt whom and when. Part of being mature is learning how to talk things out. This is something that I am continuing to learn -- and work on. Perhaps we can all learn from what happened at the WEN conference. Maybe next time, it would be better to talk things through before coming into the public eye, or on the "stage" of a public event.

People may question how or why I would console Quad, especially remembering what happened last season. The simple answer is empathy. I feel what she is going through, and I felt her pain -- her anguish. There is no harm in offering a hug to someone who is genuinely in pain. I am a woman of God, and I will be there for someone in need. And though there was a lot of tension felt, and words exchanged during the WEN conference, the positive spirit of the gathering did provide the opportunity for Simone and myself to learn from others' mistakes. I give God praise for that.

Simone seemed to really hear me, and I was able to forgive. I, like Simone, am a work in progress; I am not perfect, and have made my share of mistakes. I praise God for his forgiveness, and I am thankful for the lessons I am learning.

I have to thank Jackie as well. Jackie is a true friend, and gave Simone an unforgettable “shut your mouth script – 3 times a day.” I appreciate Jackie’s realness.

Now, Mrs. Heavenly (otherwise known as "Mrs. Unannounced" AKA: BOLD and uninvited). . .

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Boy did Lisa handle that situation like a pro! She made Heavenly feel welcomed and turned what could have been a negative situation into a positive opportunity. Lisa Nicole is the real deal -- classy, smart, and gracious.

In the end, it seems the WEN conference did indeed provide an opportunity for women to network and empower each other, and for that I am thankful.

Best Regards,
Mrs. Toya Bush-Harris

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