The Semi-Gloss

Our Associate Editor shares her unabashed love for 'MDD,' guacamole, and dogs.

May 31, 20110

There's no such thing as a favorite child at Bravo. Each of our shows warms the cocles of my heart in different ways, but there's something especially delightful about Million Dollar Decorators. Perhaps its because all of these folks are so outrageously talented, so remarkable witty and off-kilter, and so delightfully enamored of each other, that this show has me grinning so mightily. Or maybe it's because Jacqueline has been sharing some of that wine she bought for Kathryn's birthday party. . .

Let's begin at the very beginning with Mary McDonald. Mary McDonald is not kidding around. Glamor is stuck to her. She spends $5 million in a heartbeat. She has about 25 pugs. She was the inspiration for Karen from Will & Grace. Are you someone who is not Mary McDonald? Yeah, you can pretty much just sit down then because she has you beat. In this episode Mary is starting a rehaul of a phenomenal guest house to match her impeccable design in the main home. How does the guest house currently look: "suicidally depressing." If that's Mary's definition of suicide I'd hate for her to see anywhere that most humans live, because I think it would be like that movie The Happening, with people giving up on the world left and right, particularly John Leguizamo. (Am I the only person who has ever made a reference to The Happening?)

We go from one delightful human to the next, checking in with Martyn Lawrence Bullard, silver fox extraordinaire. In his charge this week is Sharon Osbourne. Let's start by addressing his voice: it's perhaps one of the most wonderful sounds I've ever heard. Listen as he pronounces things like "delicious," "light the money," and "Ze---bra." The man is the definition of dapper. After much ballyhoo-ing on paint, Barcelona chairs, the proper rug, and an extremely rushed instillation, Sharon arrives and the interaction is something like this:

signature Sharon Osbourne high-pitched tone: "Oh Martyn, it's delightful. You are like Harry Potter. Why am I not as skinny as this statue? Oh Martyn."

Martyn British gentleman tone: "Oh Sharon, of course, here are your storage cupboards."

Obviously I'm paraphrasing a bit, but it was about that glorious. Mrs. Osbourne didn't even come close to biting the head off of a bat. She was so effusive! Instead they walked in circles around the house saying precious things to each other and sort of cooing. This in itself could be a show: "Sharon and Martyn Look at Well Decorated Homes." I'd DVR it.

11 comments
Esing
Esing

Your Show is FANTASTIC! Love EVERY SINGLE ONE of the DECORATOR's! Can't wait for the next one to air!

NoraCharles
NoraCharles

I am besotted with this show! Kathryn Ireland and her maid are marvelous (said in Martyn's dulcet tones)! Martyn is marvelous! The whole damn lot of them are marvelous! I was sad when "Top Design" wasn't renewed, but MDD more than fills that void. Thank you very much Bravo! A suggestion: On one show I'd love to see them tackle a job on--dare I utter it--a budget, for us mere mortals.

Elayna
Elayna

I love this show, and challenge any one who criticizes how easy it all appears to be. It takes great restraint and panache to do a room right, from wall colors, mouldings, furniture, rugs to chach-kas. These designers are fantastic!

HOUSEandGARDEN
HOUSEandGARDEN

This show is a smash hit! I love seeing fantastic houses and gardens, and the decorators you have featured on the show offer an eclectic and sophisticated point of view. Love them all, and love the personalities of the designers, too. Thanks for bringing the best design show to television!

theSM.tumblr.com
theSM.tumblr.com

I loved the premiere! I actually used to jump off our roof into our pool when I was a kid -- Kathryn's home reminds me of the relaxed, open atmosphere I grew up in -- a creative tone that is as much an attitude as it is a design concept.

Big props to Bravo once again introducing a very intriguing cast of characters in compelling environments. I stay tuned in! ;)

ViewerAnn
ViewerAnn

I LOVE this show, and I am just as enamored with them as you are!! I can't wair for next week.

ADDICTEDhousewife;)
ADDICTEDhousewife;)

TREMENDOUS SHOW, GREAT JOB, BRAVO. Love seeing the fabulous homes, love seeing the distinct styles of the decorators. They are a great mix. You did a fantastic job in bringing us another show to which I am ALREADY ADDICTED!

Observer
Observer

I love Bravo but MDD is by far my favorite!! I actually really like all of the decorators. LOVE IT!!

tishhealy
tishhealy

since when is buying black and white furniture, with cream walls, decorating? sure the $25,000 rug was nice. and the beverly hills home- a collage of gold target and pier one mirrors? glamour? please.

tishhealy
tishhealy

i love bravo. i love decorating. since when is buying black and white furniture, with cream walls, decorating? yes, the $25,000 rug was nice. and the beverly hills house, a collage of gold mirrors- glamour? please.