Awkward

Tara's still not over how terribly awkward this episode was for everyone.

Wow that was quite an episode wasn't it? The word that kept popping in my head is the A-word. No, not that A-word, awkward. Awkward first dates, awkward dinners with friends, an awkward first kiss and a car accident on my first date -- Awkward!

Let me begin by saying that it's extremely hard putting your life on film for the world to see. Honestly it takes a lot of moxie. Everything is captured -- the good, the bad, and the ugly. That being said let's dive in!

I am so glad that we got to see Neill practicing in the studio and hear her sing. She is incredibly talented, and I am so proud of her for following her dream.

Watching dinner with Matt and Courtney was upsetting. I hate when my friends are not getting along. I could feel the tension coming through the TV screen. You both are such amazing friends that I hope you get this behind you so you can move forward.

I don't ever think I've seen Drew so at a loss for words or so miserable. The silences were palpable. I loved watching Drew with the matchmaker. Drew why wasn't I there with you and Daylon?

One of the things I love the most about Matt is his honesty. He is one hundred percent upfront with every girl and lets them know he is not looking to settle down. The awkward glances and comments the girls gave each other at the table were odd considering that everyone knew where they stood. Matt never misleads anyone. He had three beautiful women's undivided attention, now that's talent!

How handsome is Glenn? It is kind of ridiculous that he has that face, body, and is such a sweetheart!

Now on to my first date with Jody. Where do I start with all the awkward things that happened? Bowling was absolutely taking me out of my comfort zone. I was surprised in this modern age of technology that bowling has not caught on to real sanitation standards. You have to borrow bowling shoes and all they have as protection are cotton socks? The germ monsters that dwell on those shoes and no protection against them but a thin pair of socks? O.M.G. gross! Considering I was a bowling first timer, I have to admit, I was pretty awesome. 

Now on to the first kiss awkwardness. Who hasn't been there? The back and fourth of do I don't I? Well let me give you advice on this topic. If it doesn't happen naturally during the date, it's going to wind up always being the awkward at the door good-bye kiss. Maybe the fender bender didn't help, but it was truly awkward. Let's just say it should happen naturally.

The most awkward moment tonight was the dinner with Neill. I knew that Courtney was ready to apologize to Neill and move on. I don't think that Neill was ready to accept her apology. I should have hired someone to announce the fight blow by blow and round by round. Neill got some good punches in. At a certain point during the dinner I just looked down at the plate and hoped it would end if I just stopped talking. 

I have to admit I was shocked when Neill said Courtney drinks too much. That's not the case at all, and I know her like the back of my hand. I wish more than anything that Courtney and Neill would just get past this bumpy beginning and get along.

P.S. Courtney, seriously? Pleated pants? Come on!

 

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Who Run the World

Neill talks about her band's debut and being a single mother.

Hello there, beautiful people! Lots of love, love, love to you all! Thanks for hanging in with us here through all these episodes… Who'd have known everything would turn out the way it did? The good news is I believe everything happens for a reason. 

As far as this final episode goes, I don't have too much to say. I believe the majority of the episode speaks for itself… it was nice, funny, awkward, charming, and in the end, my band got to play! I was very happy we got some of that on the last episode. I love how they showed us (my band, Kitty LaLa) playing the song "Come Home With Me" as Matt and Courtney had an intimate stare/gaze-into-my-eyes-before-we-kiss moment... Hey, that's what I write for, moments like that!  

Anyway, the show was a success, and to conclude it all, I've got to give you a bit of my "behind the scenes/is it time to pull my hair out/what did I just do" inside scoop!

1. Filming a reality show is the most stressful job I've ever had in my life! 

2. I was writing and putting my band together as the show was being filmed… Talk about stress! Aside from the fact that I'm a new mother, that one really took the cake! Glad you all got to see a glimpse of our Dallas debut. Very proud of myself and the guys… Kitty LaLa killed it!

Thank you everyone for all of your sweet, beautiful, and encouraging words. It means a lot not only as a mother, but as a single mother finding her own path, a singer/songwriter/entrepreneur, and most importantly, a young woman coming into her own. I consider this experience as a true blessing. I see all the beauty that could've come from it along with everything in between… Thank you all for your sweet words and encouraging statements. Everyone on the show has been such a blessing to me and my son. I love all of you! 

I would love to hear from you (seriously!). You can contact me via Twitter @NeillSkylar or Facebook me (if my personal page is overloaded, just hit my fan page and I'll be sure to get back to you even quicker, hehe).

And please be sure to like my band Kitty LaLa or follow us on Twitter (preferably both) @KittyLaLaMusic! Here's our new music video, "Come Home With Me" --http://youtu.be/nYSoigfFnFE

Love you all so much! Please keep in touch! Muah! And for all those single mamas out there, let's stick together. If we can do all that we do, we might as well take over the world! All my love, heart, and soul to you all! God Bless! Once again… XOXO! 

 

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