Couple Q&A

Get each couple's perspective on the first year of marriage.

on Jun 24, 20130

What advice would you give to a Newlywed couple after your experiences during your first year of marriage? What lessons have you learned?

ALASKA & KIM: Compromise is a must. The best way to approach this is to make sure you choose your battles wisely. Because sometimes it just isn't worth a battle. It doesn't matter who is wrong or right (or who wins).

We found out about your love for adventure on your honeymoon in Mexico, have you had any more adventures since then?

ALASKA & KIM: Every day is an adventure in the world of Kilaska. We try to escape as much as possible even if it is during a work trip.

Are you still a bi-coastal couple? How did you both feel about the relationship discussion on the beach?

ALASKA & KIM: Yes we are still bi-coastal. I think the discussion was great besides the "girlfriend for life" comment, which was supposed to be a "sarcastic joke" LOL!

16 comments
kmsf
kmsf

You guys were touch and go throughout the season, connected one moment disconnected the next.  I really saw Tarz turnaround and show some real emotion at the Dr.'s office and my love for you both began to grow.  I just finished watching the last episode and found myself rooting for you both and I cried because I was so happy to hear about your pregnancy.  You were a little crazy in the beginning Tina, but that may be par for the course - losing a mother, newly married, disconnected father, etc... but you really redeemed yourself in the end.  I am so happy for you both.  

 

on a side note, Tina you have organic beauty that shouldn't be covered up by makeup.  Let it shine through.  

FromThisPerch
FromThisPerch

Here's my personal recap:

 

Kathryn & John - I think Kathryn is phenomenal and is beyond giving. John definitely takes advantage of that and doesn't appear to give much back, aside from money. The 1950's vibe that was going on there made me really feel for Kathryn. I ached for her, especially when she was in the pregnancy class and she heard about all of the other wives who were being pampered (and rightly so!) She took everything like a pro, but I think she'll get overwhelmed and discouraged if things don't change a few years down the line. John needs to remember that Kathryn's his wife, not his slave.

 

Tina & Tarz - I loved these two! With Tina's over-the-top personality, Tarz's low-key personality is clearly the perfect balance. I felt bad for Tina at times because Tarz often didn't seem to have enough time for her, but watching how horrible Tina's father was to Tarz was just awkward. I can't understand the rudeness! In spite of this, if I had to pick one couple to have their own show, I'd pick them! I think they'll make it.

 

Blair & Jeff - These two were funny, but Blair was just so overly dramatic about everything and seems to be way too immature. I did think it was funny when it turned out he was paying more than Jeff, though. There are definitely a lot of red flags in this marriage though. The fact that they're already going to counseling in their first year, that Jeff didn't seem to miss Blair when he was gone for a week, the fighting over finances, the fact that Jeff is unwilling to put Blair's name on the deed...if these two made it, I'd be pretty surprised.

 

Kim & Alaska - I think these two are such a sweet couple and I love their morals! It was nice to see Alaska realize the need to not replicate his father's behavior and I felt like I got to watch him grow as a man. Kim was just adorable; I feel like there's very little she wouldn't do for Alaska. I do think they need to pick LA or NYC though. It would be really hard to make a marriage last in the long run when you're living on opposite sides of the country; particularly when one partner (Kim) really feels that need to live together. It's not like she's asking for something abnormal! Once (or hopefully, if) they get that problem taken care of, I think they'll make it.

Calendargirl@20
Calendargirl@20

I don't think I'll be watching this show if it returns next season.  The so called prank scene between Tina's dad and Heather ruined the whole show for me.

DANNYE
DANNYE

Tina, I hope you watch these and you see the look of absolute adoration Tarz has for you sans makeup. You look so much more beautiful without it...so much so, I can't understand the garish makeup.

 

This was absolutely the best take on you guys. I have not been a fan through the show and I'm glad I watched the whole thing. I think we FINALLY saw the real Tina and Tarz! At the doctor, I could see Tarz sweating and he went into absolute relief when the doctor told you everything was okay. It was the most visible emotion seen from him all season. I believe he loves you but the rollercoaster that is you overwhelms him so much his only hope of survival is complete shut-down. I hope the two of you find a bit of balance between Tina's superhighs/neediness and Tarz' stoicness/lack of empathy.

bravorhjunkie
bravorhjunkie

Holy crap, these blogs are so judgmental!  As if there's any couple in the history of mankind who's married for the first time and in their first year of marriage who've done it so perfectly that it'd be considered exemplary.  Life is hugely about learning [from mistakes].  Chill out bravo watchers, gosh.

 

My favorite couple is Tartina.  Hands down she is erratically over the top, but at least she owns it.  What's infuriating is when people are whacko-nutjobs, but don't see it (hint, Theresa New Jersey).  And Tarz (ugh, please use your real name Dave!) is such a nice counter-balance to Tina.  I was always most interested watching them.  And they made me laugh.  It's hard to make me laugh.  And even their interview blog came across funny!  Whether or not the newlywed-show gets another season, Tartina should definitely get some air time somehow.

lini13
lini13

Each relationship always has the "needy one" and I think that by recognizing that problem and working on trying to change for you partner is a mature way to make it last.  I think Jeff  & Blair gets kudos for that.   They were the 1 couple that faced that issue.  The other 3 couples did not seem to work that hard on it.  I think Kim, Tina and John seemed to be the weakest link.  Kathryn was the one that really stepped up and gave into to John on just about everything.  I really hope for the sake of their baby they can compromise.  Kim and Tina just seem to want to pout if they don't get their way.  Those two need to grow up.

 

TheresaToo
TheresaToo

Love ya Blair but you are far too vulgar and immature when talking about your sexual needs!  You sound like a teenager with raging hormones and no filter.  You are an adult, in an adult relationship.  None of the other couples get nearly as graphic as you do.  There are far more sophisticated and classy ways to describe your wants, needs and desires without being pornographic. 

I agree with one of the posts indicating Tina was a mess last night!  Hope she's not nursing after the amount of alcohol she apparently consumed!

And finally, it was crystal clear that Tina's dad used Heather as a set up....likely to show Tina how he felt when she married Tarz.  He is a traditionalist and had a hard time adjusting to the cultural differences.  It was truly disgusting to see him being so sexual with Heather in a public restaurant but was so apparent it was all to prove his point (which worked by the way!)

Kathryn's going to regret giving up her career - she can have it all.....career, marriage, home, family but is allowing herself to be convinced it's 1950 again.

Don't see Kim and Alaska lasting.....bicoastal is extremely difficult.   One of them should transfer as they both are in jobs that can be performed on either coast.

tl1438
tl1438

For the record parents DO NOT "BABYSIT" their children!!!! They parent them....that's mom AND dad... Fathers do more than contribute sperm....him saying that he had babysit is just dumb!!!!  And why women allow that to happen is worse....You babysit other peoples children NOT YOUR OWN!!!  He needs to step and get in there and parent his son...DAMN!

jill.pricecorya
jill.pricecorya

Tina was so drunk on Andy's show last night, you can tell Andy was annoyed with her "dumbness".  As a new mother, I hope she gets her act together, grows up and tones it down a bit on her behavior.  She was a HOT MESS this season, could not stomach her.

trecia3
trecia3

Tina, did I miss a show. Last week your dad was with a white woman and telling he is getting married to her. This week he married a woman from India and you were ok with it. what did I miss? what happen to the white woman who was kissing your father all over the place?

BlueGrasshopper
BlueGrasshopper

 @FromThisPerch

 To Jeff & Blair (and those facing similar situations)- I disagree with the above paragraph on a couple of points.  The first year is the most sensitive because that is when the novelty and newness starts to wear down. This is normal and takes a LOT of adjusting to. The first year is when you begin to acknowledge and understand reality on a different and deeper level, and through this, challenges naturally start to emerge. Every couple has them. To not address these problems, just to keep the Hollywood façade of a happy-go-lucky marriage during the first year, as implied above, shows a lack of immaturity and unwillingness to be proactive.  Hashing out expectations is also tough the first, second, third year plus.  It is ongoing. But the more you can learn about yourself and your partner, the more realistic, and yes, the easier it is to adjust or meet expectations.  Yes, some marriages are stress free and lovey-dovey the first year. But all marriages will have their years of strife and struggle, whether they are one, five or ten years into it.  Going to counseling your first year DOES NOT determine whether your marriage will make it or not. I was annoyed to have read this, as I find it extremely naïve.  A lasting marriage is measured by the genuine effort invested, the trust bestowed with each other's feelings and thoughts, open and honest communication, shared goals and principals, and having the other persons best interest at heart.  Of course the list does not stop there.  Jeff & Blair, you are addressing your issues with the tools you are familiar with, and are seeking out new tools when the old ones are not working.  Seek first to understand, and then to be understood.  From an outsider looking in, your relationship is not without problems, but it is immensely full of love and compassion and your shared desire to make your relationship not only work, but improve, is compelling.  Thank you for your willingness to share your story with the world, and with me.  I have leaned much by your story on a personal level. I sincerely thank you!The Blue Grasshopper - Colorado

twade
twade

 @tl1438 I was so disgusted with him. "I'm only giving you an hour" huh!?! You don't want to be alone with your own son? I actually turned when he came on because I was just annoyed for Kathryn. It is like she has two children. I mean what man admits that he is jealous of a BABY.

mjohr
mjohr

 @tl1438 I was disgusted when John had the nerve to say he was in more pain than his wife while she was giving birth! What a selfish, ignorant idiot. Drugs only help so much. I can't believe a grown man needs so much attention. His wife needs to stop making excuses for him and after the thrill of new motherhood wears off, I'm sure she will.

judy@london
judy@london

 @jill.pricecorya  I felt Andy was more disgusted by Blair's "TMI" comments about his & Jeff's sex life.Tina's a brand new mom,it was probrably the first time

 they'd been out since the birth of their son.She's always kinda "over the top"but she & Tarz were definitely my fav couple on the show.

buckaroobabe
buckaroobabe

You had to listen kind of close to catch that he said he wasn't marrying the girl he made out with at the dinner with Tina and Tarz.  I almost didn't catch it.  My thoughts were how can you make out with that women and then tell your daughter you are marrying someone else.