'Online Dating' Recap

Jason's looking for his leading lady, and Matt's looking for anyone.

on Mar 20

Another day, another date. Thus is life for this week's courageous online daters, Jason and Matt.

Let's start with 33-year-old director Jason. One hundred brownie points for picking a profile name based on Zack Morris' band in Saved by the Bell ("ZackAttack8"), and another couple points for being from the Midwest. (Those guys are nice!) Though a lot of things look great about Jason on paper, the problem is he thinks life should be exactly like a romantic comedy, and he's looking for a 90's Pamela Anderson-esque leading lady.

credit: realitytvgifs.com

On the other hand, Matt, a 27-year-old insurance entrepreneur, is looking for any girl, literally any girl, that will just agree to go home with him. He's been on over 200 online dates across the country because he's always traveling for his job, and nothing's worked out so far. Matt is a constant giggler and physically cannot stop himself from dropping totally inappropriate sexual innuendos. He also loves to pick up his dates in limos—all red flags in this recapper's opinion.

While Matt's in L.A., he hits up "LindseyAshley" for a dinner date that he's hoping will go straight to the bedroom. Take a guess at how that worked out…BINGO.

Meanwhile, Jason agreed to a drink with "Erikarose," an expert in vocal fry and oyster shooters. Erika spent a lot of the date explaining a few of her past romantic foibles (read: more than one of her previous suitors asked to urinate on her), and Jason ultimately decided she wasn't exactly going to land top billing in his film of life.