Earlier this year Kanye West revealed a little bit about the breakdown that left him hospitalized in November 2016, saying he thought, at the time, that he was going to die.
“The moment when you’re in a hospital bed and you’re next to your friend and you tell them, ‘Don’t let this person leave my side,’ and they put you inside of an elevator and take all your friends away from you? That was the scariest moment of my life,” Kanye told iHeartRadio in May. “I thought I was going to get killed. My wife wasn’t in town, so I told [my friends], ‘Don’t leave my side until my wife gets here.’ And they have this moment where they’re forced to leave your side, and that has to change … I can’t express to you how traumatizing that moment is, and then you wake up drugged the f—k out.”
When Kim Kardashian did return, she called in some help. She had motivational speaker Tony Robbins on speed dial and asked him to please come try to talk to her husband.
According to The New York Times, which posted a lengthy interview with the rapper on Sunday, after his breakdown, Kanye had walked into the living room of his California home and found Tony Robbins “waiting for him.”
“It had been just a few months since the rapper, producer, fashion designer and cultural fire starter had gone through one of the most taxing periods of his public life: His wife was robbed at gunpoint, and a series of erratic concert appearances followed, culminating in a nine-day stint in the U.C.L.A. Medical Center. He was in a state of shambles, and it showed,” they write. “He could look at me and you know, I don’t know why he mentioned suicide, but he could tell that I was very low…Really medicated, shoulders slumped down, and my confidence was gone, which is a lot of the root of my superpower, because if you truly have self-confidence, no one can say anything to you.”
Robbins “had been summoned" by Kanye’s wife to stage something "like an intervention.”
What follows is pretty insane to imagine. Robbins looked Kanye in the eyes and “started issuing instructions” to help him get his head right.
“Made him stand up, get into a warrior pose and scream…’I was so self-conscious about the nanny and the housekeeper that I didn’t want them to hear me screaming in the living room,’ Kanye said. I think that that’s such a metaphor of something for the existence of so-called well-off people that they’re not really well-off — they won’t even scream in their own house,” says the report.
“He was reluctant. But he screamed.”
The NYT goes on to say that Kanye's healing wasn’t instantaneous, but it was a start.
The piece then shifts to Wyoming, visiting Kanye on a ranch there, which he’d been visiting regularly since early 2017, a couple of months after his hospital stay.
“We came here just for healing,” he said. “Getting my brain together and [expletive].”
“He was medicated then — he’d recently received a diagnosis of bipolar disorder — but over time, he began ‘learning how to not be on meds,’ adding proudly, ‘I took one pill in the last seven days.’”
Kanye opens up about thoughts of suicide, and fears his wife has wanted to leave him. He describes himself now like this, “My existence is salvage denim at this point, it’s a vintage Hermès bag. All the stains just make it better.”
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