Cast Blog: #SHAHS

Don't Tase Us, GG!

Knives! Colonics! Asa! What more could one ask for in an episode?

We start where all good shows start: looking at knives owned by someone with known anger issues. I'm of course talking about Reza's drop-in at GG's place where the discussion turned to GGs knife collection. We won't go into the knives because frankly I get frightened just thinking about it, but Reza handles it all with grace. Oh, not only does GG have knives, she has a taser named Cripsy. Well, she gets points for originality.
Reza isn't just there to talk about weapons, though, he also has to break the news to GG that he won't be attending her parents' 40th wedding anniversary. For the occasion, she and her sister decide to buy her parents a car. Since GG's father pays for most of the things in her life, I'm wondering where this money is coming from, but seems like a thoughtful gesture nonetheless. In fact, this week we get to meet GG's dad. After last week's tiny breakdown, we learn a little bit more about GG and in fact why she hasn't had a job. Apparently her anger issues have gotten in the way and GG claims that her parents wanted to work at one point but then became afraid that if she got angry it would get out of control. Maybe GG can work from home? Some of my colleagues suggested she teach knife skills! Let's just channel that energy into something positive, GG. You can do it! (P.S. Why is GG so angry, again?)
Sammy is on his grind, though, continuing to oversee Mohamed's housing development while he's away on vacation. We get a closer look at the place, which we realize really is the house featured on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. We'd recognize that pool anywhere. Mohamed comes back, and thankfully, despite a bizarre disdain for being called "anal," Mohammed was happy. On a total sidetone: am I the only one who thinks MJ and Sammy are going to end up together? I literally have no reason for that prediction, but would love to know if anyone agrees with me. Anyway, more Sammy please! Here's a fun Bravotvcom exclusive with Sammy and Asa, who both love food, so obviously they're my kind of people.
Asa is back in the studio -- but not Mister Bunny's. And this guy sets her straight on the appeal of her songs -- he basically says they won't appeal to mainstream audiences. I don't know. Listen to this. We're all diggin' it here at Bravo HQ. And we'll kind of just yell out "Asa!" in the office like that song that plays whenever she's in the car. 
Oh, and before I forget, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MJ! It's her birthday! And what do you get your friend for a birthday? A colonic obviously. Sooo that's what Reza gets for her. She and Reza get his and her colonics. Awww. Besides the colonic, Reza tells MJ he's going to go see his father in New York, and MJ agrees to go with him. We'll see that unfold next week. 
Finally, the gang meets up at GG's parents' anniversary party. But, where's MJ? Oh, she's four hours late and GG's not too happy, but we don't see the "wrath of GG" on this matter just yet. We get to wait for that one. 
As always, leave your comments below. Until next week… khodahafez!

Recap: The Inconclusive Freezer Aisle

Ep 8: Wondering who's the ping pong champion of the world and how to store your recently deceased dog? Look no further!

What do you get when you mix a frozen dog, a ping pong champion, and a polygraph test? Oh, just another episode of the Shahs of Sunset. Last night’s episode proved to be one for the books. Before we get to MJ’s freezer and GG’s polygraph outfit, let’s quickly recap what happened in our hour of power.

With Reza’s wedding coming up, Reza, MJ, and Asa are all going on a “detox.” I’d say the word “diet,” but the Priestess doesn’t like that word, so we’ll stick to the friendlier D-word. While on the subject of weddings, Jessica is turning into quite the bridezilla showing up at Mike’s office with their wedding planner…you know, just trying to plan the whole wedding during business hours.

We also saw Asifa’s dad give her sound relationship advice. He told her, “don’t be like Madonna.” I wish he would have clarified 1984 Like a Virgin Madonna or 2015 Rebel Heart Madonna. If he meant the latter, I agree…sort of.

As Asifa was getting advice from her Persian Dad, Reza paid Dr. Downs a visit to sort out some relationship issues he’s been having with Adam. We found out that not only are they having issues in the bedroom, but sweet Adam has a porny side with a bad habit of not clearing his browser history. I hope Reza and Adam figure out their issues, because their wedding clock is ticking and there is only room for two in the bed, not the world wide web.

On the friendship front, Reza and Mike had a sit down to try to hash out their differences. Mike is hurt because Reza didn’t tell him the Turkish secret, and Reza found out that Jessica thinks he’s evil. Needless to say, the sit down wasn’t a success. A text message conversation could have gone smoother. Their bromance has been lacking the “bro” part for quite some time.

Now, I’d now like to take a moment of silence for our favorite four-legged Mexican, Pablo. I was heart broken to find out that he had passed. That dog was a mascot for the Shahs. As viewers, we’ve experience many great moments with our furry friend from being pushed around town in a stroller to getting his anal glands expressed to wearing bow ties.

Hopefully MJ will bounce back quickly because I know that Pablo’s soul will live on forever. But I’m not sure GG’s eyes will ever recover from seeing Pablo wrapped up like E.T. fresh out of the Persian freezer aisle, aka MJ’s kitchen freezer.

My big question: Was Pablo stuffed between the frozen broccoli and the Häagen-Dazs or did she clear out the freezer before making a doggie morgue?

As if GG didn’t have enough stress seeing the deceased Mexican E.T., she had to go through a lie detector test given by Orville Redenbacher’s doppelganger. After a line of questioning, the test came back inconclusive, and Orville wouldn’t budge. He basically told GG, Game Over. I wonder if GG’s outfit had anything to do with it? You’d think having her hair in braids, she’d be a shoe in for a good test score, but that didn’t seem to be the case. Hopefully next week she’ll get better results when an examiner with a real computer tests her. 

Before I go, I MUST take a minute to give tribute to the one and only Ping Pong champion of the world, Vida. Put some backspin on it, Ms. Ping Pong Champ! 

Comments? Tweet me @nadinerajabi.

Nadine Rajabi is a television producer, writer, and stand-up comedian from Los Angeles. Most importantly she's Bravo’s in-house Persian.