Cast Blog: #SHAHS

Khodahafez!

MJ confronts her mother, Reza gets back into shape, and Asa makes moves in the season finale.

 

And so we made it -- it's the season finale. I felt like I was just getting to know the cast, and in some weird way I'm going to miss them. Let's re-check in with each cast member, as we did in the season's first recap.

We'll start with Reza -- last week's episode was really his finale for me. Even he said it was maybe the most pivotal day of his life. He's talking to his dad, and I feel good about where their relationship is going. I guesshe has to lose some weight because that seems to be his main concern right now. Oh, and being a Bravolebrity. Watch this.

It was MJ's turn to break my heart this week -- she confronted her mother, giving her one last chance to be nice to her. And her mother once again baffled me by telling her own daughter that she's not marriage material. MJ but just be so used to hearing it because if I was told that I would've been bawling. It wasn't like when Big told Carrie she wasn't the marrying kind. This was just mean. I hope one day MJ and her mother can make their conversation more constructive.Speaking of MJ's love life, she and Sammy go on a double blind date. While MJ finds Sammy a seemingly nice girl, Sany sets Mj up -- in more ways than one -- by inviting her ex on the date, someone Sammy knows MJ broke up with for a reason. I found this just so odd on Sammy's part, and if one of my closest friends did that to me, I probably would've been even more harsh than MJ was. When they confrtoned each other, I kind of turned on Samny because he was, as MJ said, going on the offense as a way of defense. Just admit what you did was misguided, Sammy. I guess my prediction of them ending up together may have been just as misguided, but hey, you still never know.

Next up is Asa, who I was really just proud of.. She hooked up with a powerful woman in the Persian community, and had her own little debut at her house. The showcase eatured her song "Tehranjeles" and her artwork, and I see nice things coming up in Asa's future. We'll have a video for "Tehranjeles" up on Bravotv.com soon, so check back for it!

Finally, we have Michael and GG. GG and Michael. Can't wait for these two to finally just do it. Ha! I think Mike mightb e the only man in the world who can handle GG. 

This season had some great moments -- we counted down ours here. Share yours in the Comments below.

 

Recap: Dodging Balls and Shade

Ep 7: Will a heart-to-heart over leggings mend Asa and MJ's friendship?

This episode was full of overcoming. Mike overcame the meat sweats, MJ tried to get GG to overcome her love of tattooed boys, while Reza vocalized his intimacy issues with Adam, and Asa and MJ were crunching the munch.

Let’s start with the meat, shall we? Mike and Jessica showed off their new rock to Shervin at an all-you-can-eat Brazilian Steakhouse. What I didn’t know going into this is how much meat two meatheads can eat. It’s amazing what lengths two Persian men will go to not pay a bill.

But the real beef was between Mike and Jessica. When Mike tells Shervin that he wants to reconcile things between him and his friends, Mrs. Shouhed-to-be responded with, “Mend it? No.” Something tells me that Jessica will first sauté Mike, then fillet him if he tries to mend his friendships anytime soon. And if he does, he will be the meat on the skewer he’s eating. It’ll be interesting to see how everything shakes out.


Meanwhile, Reza confided in Asa about his intimacy issues with Adam before confronting him. Apparently this isn’t a turn on:

But he thinks this is:


Good news? Adam agreed to Reza’s prenup terms and it sounds like they’re going to spice up their sex life. Hopefully they’ll meet somewhere in the middle between taking a shower and the oh so subtle, “Suck it.”

While we’re on the subject of love, MJ is determined to get GG dating again. She not only helped set up her Tinder account, but she also went as far as meeting her out one night and calling over two contenders (one tattooed and one not tattooed) as if she was on an episode of The Bachelorette. In true MJ form she was super subtle, grilling the guys with “What’s your sign?” Followed by, “How big are your dicks?” Needless to say, neither guy got a rose.

And speaking of doodools…Asa met with Mr. Doodool Tala himself, Mike, about what went down at Shervin’s party. She asked him point blank if he did it and he denied it. But after all was said and done, Mike said he couldn’t remember if he was even in Golnesa’s room in Turkey. This whole thing is starting to feel like a scene from Dude Where’s my Car, except it’s Dude, Where was my Dool?


GG is about to take a lie detector test next episode and we’ll hopefully find out where Mike’s dool was. Remains to be seen…

Now on to something that involves balls with no dools attached, dodge ball. The MJ and Asa (AKA Crunch and Munch) back and forth has been boiling since the Malibu staycation, and it seems as though it finally got addressed this episode while shopping for dodge ball outfits.


But some physical activity and a heart-to-heart in leggings proved to be the recipe for mending a friendship. However, I’m not sure MJ apologizing has fixed this problem as they both still seem a little skeptical of each other. Can’t we all just get a long in the name of gold?

Before I go, can we give credit where credit is due? Here’s to the lady at World of Leggings! Men, take note: When you’re stuck and can’t find “meggings,” just wear your leggings backwards. Problem solved.

Oh, and as for Goldie, now I know where he got his name…

Comments? Tweet me @nadinerajabi.

Nadine Rajabi is a television producer, writer, and stand-up comedian from Los Angeles. Most importantly she's Bravo’s in-house Persian.