I was more insecure I would have been devastated by her comment about me. I'm tired of people around me playing dirty and taking jabs at
me while I stay chill. I am done with it. You wanna go there, fine I'll go there with you. So, I made the pill comment.
Was it right to say that in front of everybody? No. Even though everybody talks about MJ's drinking (etc.) problem all the time openly to each other, I don't talk behind people's back. I straight up say it to their face. But this particular matter should have been discussed in private. She started down that road and I stupidly went down it with her, mainly so she sees what it feels like. I felt bad that I said it and it was a mistake. That's not who I am. Next time somebody pushes my buttons by insulting me, I will still not insult them back. It's cheap and tacky either way.
When MJ was blurting the MOST disgusting names at me from behind the bushes, I realized that I pushed a very sensitive button and she wasn't ready to deal with it. After seeing how she (over)reacted about my comment, I realized that it was wrong to say it in that setting.
But in all honesty, I really wasn't aware of the magnitude of the problem until I saw her extreme and ugly reaction. It's very difficult being close with somebody going through something like this.
If I had known what a serious problem this was, I definitely would not have made the comment.