Cast Blog: #SHAHS

Lilly: "Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right"

Lilly weighs in on Reza's hurtful toast.

This was in interesting episode because everyone got to meet two fresh faces, Asa’s boyfriend Jermaine and my big sister Yassi.

The episode starts with a continuation of the huge fight between MJ and Reza in their office. I can’t even believe the things they said to each other! This fight is serious. They have been friends for years, so I hope they work it out sooner rather than later.

I am also excited to see what comes of the new partnership between Reza and Mike. I don’t know Mike very well, but he does not seem “dumb as rocks” as MJ states he is. To the contrary, he seems to be sharp, hungry, and ready to work (not to mention handsome!) I wish them the best.

Yassi is my OLDER sister. Yes, I realize she is far more blessed than I am genetically and she is eternally a hot 21-year-old, but she is still my OLDER sister. Love/hate her for that! My sister and I are very close. We love and support each other in every way possible. We may look identical on the outside, however, personality wise, we are complete opposites.  

I was invited to have drinks with the group and a comedian by the name of Tehran. I actually know Tehran personally from his comedy shows, so I’m excited on the one hand. On the other hand, I have some anxiety about attending because MJ and Omid will be there. I have heard SO many horrible things MJ has been saying about me behind my back, and the last time I saw Omid he threatened to backhand me, so I decided I would invite my sister to come along for moral support. Plus, I want her to finally meet everyone!  

Before we get to that night, can we please talk about the conversation that GG and Mike had at GG’s house? WTF?! My head is still spinning from listening to it. GG changes her story 10 times during the course of the conversation, and at this point, I don’t think she even remembers the truth of what actually happened.The scene with Asa and her boyfriend Jermaine was very touching for me. Persians in general can be very racist towards African Americans. There is a huge stigma in the Persian community associated with Persian girls dating African American men. To many Persian fathers, it is unacceptable. Watching Asa and Jermaine interact with each other is so refreshing because it rains on all of those stigmas. Their love for each other radiates the screen, and their support and encouragement towards one another is touching. I hope Asa’s courage in sharing her relationship with the world helps to break so many prejudicial boundaries that still exist. Black, White, Brown, Yellow, Gay, Straight, Male, Female: we are all equal. We are all one. And, love is blind.

This episode also gives a glimpse into one of my favorite times of the day: GLAM SQUAD TIME!! I have the most amazing team of hair and makeup artists that I use for special occasions. I call them my #GhalichiGLAM squad. While glamming me out in this episode you will hear me tell my makeup artist, “I love the way you make my nose look like I have had a nose job.” I don’t want this to be misleading as I HAVE had a nose job. (CLICK HERE to read my blog post on what plastic surgery I have and have NOT had). 

Sometimes there isn’t enough time to show the whole conversation, so it can be confusing. What my makeup artist and I were discussing at the time is how contouring (or “shading”) with darker foundation (or powder) on the sides of the nose can actually make your nose look entirely different (as though you’ve had a nose job)! I just wanted to clear that up in case it mislead viewers into thinking I was born with this little nose (hello, I’m Persian!)

Off to the event my sister and I go. As usual, from the moment MJ walks in (late) she is ready to attack me. I politely say hello to her, introduce her to my sister, and the first words that come out of her mouth are “Lilly, you should have worn that dress instead” while she points at my sister.

Enough is enough. I am a classy woman and don’t need to belittle other women, but at the same time, I will be damned if I sit back and let someone constantly attack me.  MJ needs to learn that you can’t dish it and expect not to take it.What I don’t understand is why she would attack me about my dress and what I should have worn anyway. As Reza stated earlier when she called him fat, does she not have a mirror at her house? It’s the oldest saying in the book: people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.

I do think it was a little insensitive of Reza to toast to everyone except for MJ. I get that they are fighting, and Reza is also fed up with how disrespectful she constantly is towards me and Asa, but as a friend for over 20 years, there is probably a better, more private way to deal with it. I am by no means excusing MJ’s bad behavior, I am simply saying two wrongs don’t make a right.

I like to end this week’s blog post by saying "OH MY GOD" -- watching Asa’s mom’s road rage was hilarious. I have met her mother in real life and she is the sweetest, kindest woman. To see that same harmless woman have that extreme of a level of road rage was hysterical! Come on -- her mom works her butt off and supports her entire family, she is entitled to a little road rage. 

xoxo

 

 

Recap: The Inconclusive Freezer Aisle

Ep 8: Wondering who's the ping pong champion of the world and how to store your recently deceased dog? Look no further!

What do you get when you mix a frozen dog, a ping pong champion, and a polygraph test? Oh, just another episode of the Shahs of Sunset. Last night’s episode proved to be one for the books. Before we get to MJ’s freezer and GG’s polygraph outfit, let’s quickly recap what happened in our hour of power.

With Reza’s wedding coming up, Reza, MJ, and Asa are all going on a “detox.” I’d say the word “diet,” but the Priestess doesn’t like that word, so we’ll stick to the friendlier D-word. While on the subject of weddings, Jessica is turning into quite the bridezilla showing up at Mike’s office with their wedding planner…you know, just trying to plan the whole wedding during business hours.

We also saw Asifa’s dad give her sound relationship advice. He told her, “don’t be like Madonna.” I wish he would have clarified 1984 Like a Virgin Madonna or 2015 Rebel Heart Madonna. If he meant the latter, I agree…sort of.

As Asifa was getting advice from her Persian Dad, Reza paid Dr. Downs a visit to sort out some relationship issues he’s been having with Adam. We found out that not only are they having issues in the bedroom, but sweet Adam has a porny side with a bad habit of not clearing his browser history. I hope Reza and Adam figure out their issues, because their wedding clock is ticking and there is only room for two in the bed, not the world wide web.

On the friendship front, Reza and Mike had a sit down to try to hash out their differences. Mike is hurt because Reza didn’t tell him the Turkish secret, and Reza found out that Jessica thinks he’s evil. Needless to say, the sit down wasn’t a success. A text message conversation could have gone smoother. Their bromance has been lacking the “bro” part for quite some time.

Now, I’d now like to take a moment of silence for our favorite four-legged Mexican, Pablo. I was heart broken to find out that he had passed. That dog was a mascot for the Shahs. As viewers, we’ve experience many great moments with our furry friend from being pushed around town in a stroller to getting his anal glands expressed to wearing bow ties.

Hopefully MJ will bounce back quickly because I know that Pablo’s soul will live on forever. But I’m not sure GG’s eyes will ever recover from seeing Pablo wrapped up like E.T. fresh out of the Persian freezer aisle, aka MJ’s kitchen freezer.

My big question: Was Pablo stuffed between the frozen broccoli and the Häagen-Dazs or did she clear out the freezer before making a doggie morgue?

As if GG didn’t have enough stress seeing the deceased Mexican E.T., she had to go through a lie detector test given by Orville Redenbacher’s doppelganger. After a line of questioning, the test came back inconclusive, and Orville wouldn’t budge. He basically told GG, Game Over. I wonder if GG’s outfit had anything to do with it? You’d think having her hair in braids, she’d be a shoe in for a good test score, but that didn’t seem to be the case. Hopefully next week she’ll get better results when an examiner with a real computer tests her. 

Before I go, I MUST take a minute to give tribute to the one and only Ping Pong champion of the world, Vida. Put some backspin on it, Ms. Ping Pong Champ! 

Comments? Tweet me @nadinerajabi.

Nadine Rajabi is a television producer, writer, and stand-up comedian from Los Angeles. Most importantly she's Bravo’s in-house Persian.