Cast Blog: #SHAHS

MJ's Jabs

Lilly thinks the double standards for MJ's comments need to stop and reflects on her relationship with Ali.

Episode 5 begins with a dinner date between Omid and GG. Even though they say they aren't dating, I definitely see some chemistry between them. Maybe they will start dating soon! My only issue with GG is her constant belittling of everyone else in the group. Did she really just say all her friends are the "Ass" in "Class" for inviting Omid out for a night of fun? I think inviting her friend out was a nice gesture, and the fact that she wasn't invited is insensitive, but her friends are just trying to show her that your actions have consequences, and getting physical is unacceptable.

We then get to meet Reza's mom! She's so fabulous, but what's up with her telling Reza to shave his mustache? Don't do it Rez!! I love how his mom supports his decision to partner with Mike, but also advices him to make amends with MJ. Sometimes it takes a parent's wisdom to make you realize that although you're an adult now, you may be acting childish.

MJ decides to throw a big party for her 40th birthday and in lieu of presents to have her friends bring a man for her. I think it’s a fabulous idea. It's hard to meet a man, especially in LA, and especially at 40. I hope someone brings her a great present!

Next, we get a front row seat at Mike and Reza's photo-shoot. What a bunch of studs!!! If these two delicious faces can't sell residential real estate in Southern California, then I don't know who can.

After the break, we find ourselves at GG's house with her cute pup Hailey. As usual, MJ throws a jab at me while on the phone with GG by telling her "In about 5 minutes, Lilly’s going to get shipped back to the welfare line she came from and out of my life." If I had made this comment about MJ, it would be a HUGE deal that the skinny rich girl is picking on the chubby middle class girl. But, the other way around people find it acceptable? Double standard. Either way, MJ, I could buy your whole life and donate it to charity for fun if I wanted to, lets be real. The fact that I am self-made is something I am extremely proud of; you should pay attention and learn a few things from me.

I am shocked to see that MJ is inviting Asa and not GG to her birthday party, especially since as GG says MJ has been doing nothing but talking so much s--- about Asa to GG. Suddenly, she switches sides? Interesting. Either way, I think it is the right decision, and I am glad that MJ is realizing it now. GG shouldn't be ostracized from her friends, but she does need to make an attempt show them that she is sorry and she will not get physical again before they can trust to invite her places.

The next scene is a dinner scene I have with one of my best friends, Raumak. Raumak and I have been friends for over eight years. She is also an attorney and we actually worked together for a year at the Children's Law Center before I left the practice of law. Raumak is still a child advocate today. Eight years ago, Raumak and I were in the same position, young, single lawyers. She was dating another lawyer, Neama, and so was I, Ali. She is now married to Neama with two children (YES, this skinny bitch has TWO kids!), and Ali and I are pretty much in the same place we were back then.

I am very proud of all the success I have achieved, but at the same time, I long to be a wife, and a mother. I am turning 30 in 2013, I just don't want another decade to go by and I find myself to be 40, still unmarried and without kids. Success is important, but my other dreams are too.

Ali and I have been dating since I was 19. He was my very first boyfriend, my first everything. We have had our ups and downs, but we do love each other so much. The problem at this point is he lives in Texas and I live in LA. I already moved back to TX for him once in 2008 (Click here to read my blog post about mine and Ali's relationship), I ended up moving back to LA, so if he wants to make it work, this time he has to move to LA. I have given him the deadline of Jan 1, 2013 to make the move, after that, I am going to move on with my life. I have to; I can't wait for him forever.

As you guys see from the telephone call I have with him in my kitchen, I'm not so sure it's going to happen.

The episode ends with MJ and Reza making up, AMEN. Maybe now she'll stop being such a bitch to me!

Xoxo,
Lilly Ghalichi

Recap: Dodging Balls and Shade

Ep 7: Will a heart-to-heart over leggings mend Asa and MJ's friendship?

This episode was full of overcoming. Mike overcame the meat sweats, MJ tried to get GG to overcome her love of tattooed boys, while Reza vocalized his intimacy issues with Adam, and Asa and MJ were crunching the munch.

Let’s start with the meat, shall we? Mike and Jessica showed off their new rock to Shervin at an all-you-can-eat Brazilian Steakhouse. What I didn’t know going into this is how much meat two meatheads can eat. It’s amazing what lengths two Persian men will go to not pay a bill.

But the real beef was between Mike and Jessica. When Mike tells Shervin that he wants to reconcile things between him and his friends, Mrs. Shouhed-to-be responded with, “Mend it? No.” Something tells me that Jessica will first sauté Mike, then fillet him if he tries to mend his friendships anytime soon. And if he does, he will be the meat on the skewer he’s eating. It’ll be interesting to see how everything shakes out.


Meanwhile, Reza confided in Asa about his intimacy issues with Adam before confronting him. Apparently this isn’t a turn on:

But he thinks this is:


Good news? Adam agreed to Reza’s prenup terms and it sounds like they’re going to spice up their sex life. Hopefully they’ll meet somewhere in the middle between taking a shower and the oh so subtle, “Suck it.”

While we’re on the subject of love, MJ is determined to get GG dating again. She not only helped set up her Tinder account, but she also went as far as meeting her out one night and calling over two contenders (one tattooed and one not tattooed) as if she was on an episode of The Bachelorette. In true MJ form she was super subtle, grilling the guys with “What’s your sign?” Followed by, “How big are your dicks?” Needless to say, neither guy got a rose.

And speaking of doodools…Asa met with Mr. Doodool Tala himself, Mike, about what went down at Shervin’s party. She asked him point blank if he did it and he denied it. But after all was said and done, Mike said he couldn’t remember if he was even in Golnesa’s room in Turkey. This whole thing is starting to feel like a scene from Dude Where’s my Car, except it’s Dude, Where was my Dool?


GG is about to take a lie detector test next episode and we’ll hopefully find out where Mike’s dool was. Remains to be seen…

Now on to something that involves balls with no dools attached, dodge ball. The MJ and Asa (AKA Crunch and Munch) back and forth has been boiling since the Malibu staycation, and it seems as though it finally got addressed this episode while shopping for dodge ball outfits.


But some physical activity and a heart-to-heart in leggings proved to be the recipe for mending a friendship. However, I’m not sure MJ apologizing has fixed this problem as they both still seem a little skeptical of each other. Can’t we all just get a long in the name of gold?

Before I go, can we give credit where credit is due? Here’s to the lady at World of Leggings! Men, take note: When you’re stuck and can’t find “meggings,” just wear your leggings backwards. Problem solved.

Oh, and as for Goldie, now I know where he got his name…

Comments? Tweet me @nadinerajabi.

Nadine Rajabi is a television producer, writer, and stand-up comedian from Los Angeles. Most importantly she's Bravo’s in-house Persian.