Cast Blog: #SHAHS

Practice What You Preach

GG wishes Asa would get a real job, Reza would stop picking targets, and Lilly would fess up.

WOW!!! Wow is all I have to say about this past season. It was a rough one, right??? Well it was nothing compared to this reunion show! I must say I'm glad that (for once) everyone is not attacking me, but why do these people pick one target and gang up on that person? So now everybody is against my girl MJ. It seems like anytime Reza is mad at someone, the rest just follow him like his little bitches!

I am not here to say if MJ has a problem with alcohol or pills. I am only here to be supportive of her when she needs me. What Lilly said is correct. . .if MJ doesn't admit to having a problem then the problem DOES NOT exist!! So leave MJ alone. If Reza and his sidekicks truly love MJ and believe she has a substance abuse issue, then we should have had a meeting and set up an intervention. But trying to bust someone out on TV is not nice!!! The worst part is that I had to sit through the whole reunion so belive me when I say -- y'all ain't seen nothin' yet! They still have much more to attack MJ with.. sadddddd!

I thought it was rather interesting that Lilly brought all of the paperwork to prove title and ownership of property. I can understand how it must feel when someone is constantly accusing you of being a trophy girlfriend and getting everything from your boyfriend. I guess that's what made her want to prove people wrong. But if people kept calling her a purple alien, would she feel the need to prove it with a birth certificate? I dunno. . .I'm just saying.

I'm not exactly sure why Ass-a likes to involve herself in my conversations when it's quite clear I wasn't speaking to her! I don't like Ass-a. This season Ass-a made it quite clear to the whole world watching our show, that she's a walking contradiction. Claims to be so spiritual, claims to want to give out positive energy. . .But her actions don't amount up to your fake words. Practice what you preach bitch!

So, if this person wants to keep interrupting me while I'm clearly speaking to Andy Cohen, then I'm going to go in and speak the truth. YES, the diamonds that Ass-a puts in the water are BLOOD diamonds! To prove us all wrong, Ass-a should get the certficate from the diamond dealer which proves they only affiliate with conflict-free diamonds. Once you find that the buyer is conflict-free, you find out if their buyer is also conflict-free. It's an unfortunate thing to claim you're giving people positive energy through diamonds that people have been killed and have slaved for.

Moving on. . .Ass-a claims I've never done shit with my life or worked. . .Ummm, does this idiot call what she does work? The bitch can't sing. She basically has sex with diamonds and water filters and claims to be blessing it. . .Is that your job bitch??? I know you guys aren't stupid, so I'm sure you were all wondering how she can have a house and car like that but have no money in the bank. Get a REAL job you contradicting, Boy George, beastly, evil bitch. STOP CONTRIBUTING TO BLOOD DIAMONDS!!!

For the record, I have always owned up to not having worked before, but since the launch of GG's Extensions, I have been working my butt off and the company is blowing up! Most importantly, it's a REAL job!

Let me meditate for a second, because that just got me worked up. . .

Some of you may know that Reza and I have been trying to work on our friendship since this feeling. But I must admit I can tell sometimes he just wants to blurt something out at me. LOL! I appreciate your efforts Reza.

Now I can't go and tell you guys what's going to happen in Part 2 of the Reunion, but I can tell you this. . .It gets really really messy!!! You'll probably need to meditate right after watching! Get that yoga mat ready because you'll be on it for a while after you see our hot and messy Part 2 of the Shahs of Sunset Reunion Special!

Recap: The Inconclusive Freezer Aisle

Ep 8: Wondering who's the ping pong champion of the world and how to store your recently deceased dog? Look no further!

What do you get when you mix a frozen dog, a ping pong champion, and a polygraph test? Oh, just another episode of the Shahs of Sunset. Last night’s episode proved to be one for the books. Before we get to MJ’s freezer and GG’s polygraph outfit, let’s quickly recap what happened in our hour of power.

With Reza’s wedding coming up, Reza, MJ, and Asa are all going on a “detox.” I’d say the word “diet,” but the Priestess doesn’t like that word, so we’ll stick to the friendlier D-word. While on the subject of weddings, Jessica is turning into quite the bridezilla showing up at Mike’s office with their wedding planner…you know, just trying to plan the whole wedding during business hours.

We also saw Asifa’s dad give her sound relationship advice. He told her, “don’t be like Madonna.” I wish he would have clarified 1984 Like a Virgin Madonna or 2015 Rebel Heart Madonna. If he meant the latter, I agree…sort of.

As Asifa was getting advice from her Persian Dad, Reza paid Dr. Downs a visit to sort out some relationship issues he’s been having with Adam. We found out that not only are they having issues in the bedroom, but sweet Adam has a porny side with a bad habit of not clearing his browser history. I hope Reza and Adam figure out their issues, because their wedding clock is ticking and there is only room for two in the bed, not the world wide web.

On the friendship front, Reza and Mike had a sit down to try to hash out their differences. Mike is hurt because Reza didn’t tell him the Turkish secret, and Reza found out that Jessica thinks he’s evil. Needless to say, the sit down wasn’t a success. A text message conversation could have gone smoother. Their bromance has been lacking the “bro” part for quite some time.

Now, I’d now like to take a moment of silence for our favorite four-legged Mexican, Pablo. I was heart broken to find out that he had passed. That dog was a mascot for the Shahs. As viewers, we’ve experience many great moments with our furry friend from being pushed around town in a stroller to getting his anal glands expressed to wearing bow ties.

Hopefully MJ will bounce back quickly because I know that Pablo’s soul will live on forever. But I’m not sure GG’s eyes will ever recover from seeing Pablo wrapped up like E.T. fresh out of the Persian freezer aisle, aka MJ’s kitchen freezer.

My big question: Was Pablo stuffed between the frozen broccoli and the Häagen-Dazs or did she clear out the freezer before making a doggie morgue?

As if GG didn’t have enough stress seeing the deceased Mexican E.T., she had to go through a lie detector test given by Orville Redenbacher’s doppelganger. After a line of questioning, the test came back inconclusive, and Orville wouldn’t budge. He basically told GG, Game Over. I wonder if GG’s outfit had anything to do with it? You’d think having her hair in braids, she’d be a shoe in for a good test score, but that didn’t seem to be the case. Hopefully next week she’ll get better results when an examiner with a real computer tests her. 

Before I go, I MUST take a minute to give tribute to the one and only Ping Pong champion of the world, Vida. Put some backspin on it, Ms. Ping Pong Champ! 

Comments? Tweet me @nadinerajabi.

Nadine Rajabi is a television producer, writer, and stand-up comedian from Los Angeles. Most importantly she's Bravo’s in-house Persian.