Asa Soltan Rahmati

Asa thinks Lilly can learn a thing or two about hospitality.

on Nov 11, 20130

Watching this episode, the summer suddenly feels like a very long time ago. So much has happened since then.

I am laughing watching Reza go car shopping. We Persians are obsessed with getting the very best deal possible! And equally obsessed with not letting others (salespeople) get one over us. Ha!

It makes me happy to see Merc spend quality time with her mom. Equally, it's lovely to see Golnesa spend time with her sister. I am looking forward to see both of their relationships evolve into a better place. 

I love being with my family and I love eating delicious food. Sooooo eating delicious food with my family is one of the best things in the world. And having Reza with us just made it even better. I'm a curvy woman and love it that way. Certainly do not want to be skinny. I eat all the food that I love and definitely work out a lot to keep my physique. My mom has the worst eating habits. I feel like my whole life I have been trying to get her to eat better and be healthier. It actually has very little to do with aesthetics and everything to do with her health. At this point I will do whatever it takes to get her to eat better and exercise, hence the deal I made with her. If she can work on her health and fitness I will hook her up with whatever she wants nipped or tucked. What's hilarious though is that she says all that but my mom is 100% natural. She is talking a big game about going to Germany and having my cousin "fix" her body, but she is totally scared of any type of surgery or procedure. So we will see...

Mike and Jessica. They are very cute together.

Fast forwarding to Lilly's birthday. Yes, MJ should have RSVP'd but didn't. However, she did reach out to Lilly to ask her to come in a very sweet humble text. In my view, Lilly should have let her come. Or just said, "No, I don't want her here." It was her birthday party -- if she didnt want MJ there, she should have just not invited her. But to make such an ordeal about her not RSVPing and that being the reason she couldn't come was way extra. In our culture, we learn at a very young age to take the greatest care of our guests. Persians are known for their hospitality -- in fact, it's one of the pilars of our social etiquette  This is also why I was so thrown off by Lilly's position. Lilly is not a bad person but I was very surprised by her behavior.  

The comment about "class" was silly. It's strange to draw a connection between RSVPing and class. I've had a number of major sit-down dinners and parties (at MY OWN HOUSE!) and attended very very exclusive sit-down dinners. There is always a +/- 4 factor. Some people who RSVP'd end up not coming and others will come who did not RSVP. These are the unspoken rules of any party. In short, if Lilly wanted MJ to be there, the RSVP would have played no factor.  

In my book, you don't send your friends away at the gate for not RSVPing.

On a more positive note, it was awesome to connect with Golnesa on a real and organic level. I'm happy we can put all that negativity behind us and move forward on solid ground.

Catch you, lovers, on the next one! 

xooxx

Asa

43 comments
Nashabella
Nashabella

TBH, the whole "locked out at the gate" imagery stems from Reza and Reza alone. He's the one to conjure it up and make it dramatic.

melissa.landry
melissa.landry

MJ is too old to act the way she does. The moment Lilly hit the scene MJ showed her nothing but hate. The female MJ would not have come to my party either. I really liked you and Reza last season. I don't like you any more because you stand for nothing. And in case you don't know that saying; If you stand for nothing you will fall for anything. 

Sharlz101
Sharlz101

You did rite by not speaking up at restaurant..that was between Lilly an Mj. Lilly clearly stated MJ wasnt her friend..if that was the case she shouldnt have sent her an invite in the first place...

Toeknee
Toeknee

You are not a good friend and the same with reza.....shame on you for not sticking up for Lilly at the restaurant....

katiedidmomsaid
katiedidmomsaid

team lily.

 

in the viewer's book, its been obvious from Mercedes first snide comment about Lilly that they are not friends. Frankly. Mercedes was lucky that Lilly even showed her the courtesy of an invitation!

cinchy
cinchy

"In my book, you don't send your friends away at the gate for not RSVPing."

 

except that MJ has never been a friend to Lilly. 

trish.hurley.56
trish.hurley.56

Asa, have you thought about creating a glitter filled clear top,{in a big diamond shape} that would slip over the standard cap after the bottle was capped? Might be cheaper and prettier.

JennyYo
JennyYo

I think it was very poor of the "Persian Posse" to confront Lilly about her own damn birthday party.  The night was about Lilly and not MJ.  You make accommodations for your friends, not acquaintances. MJ did not RSVP and only probably decided to go after she knew she would be the "only" one not there.  The bottom line is MJ & Lilly are not friends.  The invitation was only extended as a courtesy to the group.  Reza made that crap up by stating she was going to left at the gate.  If you watch that footage you see that.  So everyone jumps on board about MJ being left at the gate when that was never said.  If Reza was a good friend to Lilly and MJ he should have stayed neutral with the whole situation.  I don't understand why MJ was making such a big deal about attending a party for someone she does not even like.

ESinAZ
ESinAZ

I was so angry for you at the bottling plant.  Didn't they know the shape of the bottle and cap when they bid the project to you?  Hopefully you got a good lawyer to read your contract  and shove it to them!  IMHO...

susanzavagli
susanzavagli

MJ was more or less telling Lily to stick it with her evite by not responding...leave it at that...they don't like eachother

PlasticPeggy
PlasticPeggy

You really should stop citing etiquette as a negative on Lilly's behalf. She went above and beyond to even invite her.  Yet you don't  mention MJ's lack thereof in dismissing the evite and not RSVPing.

biancashines
biancashines

Asa , i  think that you are sweet  and clearly articulate.   Those girls were sent 2 u by some higher power, 'vause w/out u on the show, these people would be like a bunch of cats in a paper bag !

Good luck on your 'diamond h20',  keep it up , that is your chin and your positivity !       inspiration .

Blink
Blink

Well from tonight's eppy, MJ pretty much admitted to intentionally not RSVPing.  Not a fan of Lily's, but she stated that she invited MJ because of you, Reza and Mike because she was your friend.  And your confessionals was backhanded digs as well so don't get all heated about Lily talking about "class."  If you had such a problem, you should've given up your seat at dinner to MJ, who obviously found it too difficult to click "yes" on an E-invite.

GirlFromKY
GirlFromKY

Asa, come on!!!

 

MJ reached out to Lilly the NIGHT BEFORE her expensively-catered formal event which was held at someone else's home.  It wasn't like Lilly was just having a few friends over for a casual cocktail at her own place.  This was a totally different type of event which required Lilly to also extend courtesies to her event host as well as all the other vendors too.  In addition to Lilly's original invitation, she also reached out a SECOND time to those who hadn't RSVP'd with another followup email...to which MJ STILL did not respond.  You're saying Lilly was the one who was trying to make such an ordeal about MJ's lack of response...geez...that's just not true!  As per the footage YOU GUYS were the ones who were confronting Lilly to which she had no choice but to explain something she shouldn't even have had to!  I can't believe you were so rude as to confront your hostess about HER party she was providing for everyone's collective (and very expensive) entertainment while you guys are STILL condoning MJ's oblivious & selfish ways you've had to put up with these past several years.  Had MJ RSVP'd, you know she would have been 3 hours late too.  That means Lilly would have had to pay for MJ's catered $250 plate uneaten we all know she wouldn't have shown up for anyway!  You need to adjust your thinking here.  For example, I know good and well you NEVER would have dealt with MJ's flighty bs when your Persian Barbara Walters hosted such an important evening for YOU during first season! 

michelle.nicholas.77
michelle.nicholas.77

Good for you for sticking up for what's right Asa.  I can't believe some of the comments on here.  MJ is far from my favorite person, but any good hostess knows that you will not get 100% of your invited guests to RSVP.  Nor should you plan to turn someone away as a "lesson" for their poor behavior.  Lily should have just not invited her.  Or, if she was hell bent on sending the invite, follow up with a phone call.  No, she shouldn't HAVE to do that for a grown adult, but that's what someone with hospitality and class would do. I'm glad you could separate your issues with MJ and focus on what is right vs. what is wrong.

Danny83
Danny83

Asa, I am disappointed in you with this post. To me you are principled person and as such your position on issues reflex those core and unchanging values, which I believe makes you so beautiful. In regards to the RSVP situation, that this should be a situation is a because there is a double standard with MJ and a high tolerance for her rubbish. If you get an invitation you should RSVP, there is no way around it, its an invitation to respond to event for which you are being asked to attend. These situations that you are positing where these rules should be revised to accommodate MJ are exceptions and given that MJ and Lily are not close these exceptions do not matter. If it were a different situation and they were good friends then you these 'situations' could be justified or at the very least explored in a discussion. However, as they are not friends, I expected that you would have understood the courtesy inherent to Lily's invitation and see MJ's reaction was a slap in the face.  Asa, you are golden and I have often looked to provide a reasoned and honest point of view to the craziness that are you guys. I hope this post is not a reflection of a change in you, otherwise my dear you will start looking like just another messy person on TV going around in circles for everybody's amusement - and believe me, your fans, like me, will be very sad.  

AddictedToBravo25
AddictedToBravo25

Another one who needs to watch this show, see who you really are. You all live in some dream world thinking you portray class, hospitality, spirituality. If this is the Persian way of hospitality, you all need to take lessons from the Italians, Irish, Americans, English etc.

LilyL
LilyL

I love that Reza got no flack for being so horrible and nasty to Mercedes at the reunion on national TV but you all go after Lilly when it was Mercedes who was being so rude and so nasty to Lily.    You all need shrinks.

biancashines
biancashines

Asa, i get a very pleasing feeling overwash me when I watch you.   People can see thru the t.v.  and your bounty is beautiful.  The show would not be worth watching without you.

LolaL
LolaL

If you want "Merc" there so much, you invite her to your own party.  I love how you all excuse how rude Mercedes was and attack the one who is paying for the party.   Mercedes was sent a second email explaining exactly what would happen if she did not RSVP and she chose not too.  Seems to me Mercedes chose herself what would happen.

backgammon
backgammon

I like you on the show but you, as a Persian Pop Princess, SHOULD know that a RSVP is required for a sit down dinner.  Last season you were all over MJ for her behavior, but this year she is being responsible?  I know you have had a hard time with you career, but putting out Lilly's flame will not make your flame any brighter. 

 

Lilly should have figured out from her party that you are not her friend.  Perhaps she will catch on this year.

Basic101
Basic101

Oh please.  Pillar of hospitality?  Explain to me how dis-inviting GG to Cabo was hospitable?  MJ was invited 2x. to a birthday party that she later says that she thought it was a back-yard BBQ and decided to not reply at all.  That plus the manner in which MJ repeated treated Lilly last season adds up to, enough already.

 

If you think your 'representing' the Persian Community, there are likely more of them that don't want you to do that and would argue, oh no, we are not like that.  In fact, the Shahs Group are far different than the loving, respectable, good natured, sober, Great Neck, NY family that Reza is lucky to have.

 

You can learn something from them. 

piperbeau
piperbeau

I'm glad your all working it out... Maybe you really are more spiritual than I originally thought!! 

msmith76
msmith76

Lily was correct to have sent an invitation to MJ.  Had she not that would have been messy since they are all in the same circle of friends.  MJ was wrong for not sending a RSVP in time.  She knew how Lily is and knew everyone else was responding as they told her.  She intentionally behaved poorly. Reza on the other hand stirred the pot by intentionally going back and forth.  He should have stayed out of it completely.  Reza is a two faced low down dirty punk.  Reza had a duty to jump in the argument MJ and Lily were having when MJ deceided to speak for Mike, Jessica and everyone else at that table by saying "These are all my friends"  They are not Your friends.  I would have stopped all conversation by saying oh no I'm Lily's friend.  So speak about you and you only.  But none of those losers had th eheart to stand up for Lily.  That is because they are all envious.

msmith76
msmith76

You send any one away who disrespect the fact that each plate cost a couple of hundred dollars and they did not bother respecting that.  However, Lily diid not send her away the porker never showed up thanks to her girlfriend Reza.

msmith76
msmith76

Asa is not smart enough to compromise.  The priestess has to have everything her way or no way.

msmith76
msmith76

Review the footage.  The pristess failed.  The priestess is now defrocked.

ksabo1963
ksabo1963

 @michelle.nicholas.77 so here are the fact Michele as your classless ass has never thrown a catered event - you have to provide a headcount 72 hours prior to the event and yes adding another person to an already planned for seating may not be possible further MJ looked at the Evite SIX yes SIX time so clearly she knew about and she CHOSE not to RSVP - MJ is classless just like you and deserves to have been excluded - If ASA and Rezza thought it was so important for her to be there then give up their seat

melissa.landry
melissa.landry

 @Danny83 Danny83 you are so right. MJ always showed up late to be seen. She hated on Lilly the moment she saw her because she is filled with hate and jealousy. They are not friends and for Reza and Asa to think that Lilly should have put up with MJ's shenanigans as they have saddens me.

michelle.nicholas.77
michelle.nicholas.77

 @Danny83 Asa is 100% right in her position on this one.  We've all known people who don't RSVP.  Many people don't and it's a failing in our culture.  BUT, MJ (BTW I'm not a fan of hers either) did call Lilly prior to the event.  The graceful thing to do would be to welcome her to the event.  But Lily, in all of her spoiled nonsense (did you see the party-ridiculous) chose to instead use this for more attention.  

michelle.nicholas.77
michelle.nicholas.77

 @LolaL You know darn well that Lily only invited her because she knew she'd never RSVP.  She didn't want her there, but instead of just not inviting her, she wanted her to experience the embarrassment factor too.  These people are spoiled and immature and I'm embarrassed to be of the same generation as them.

msmith76
msmith76

Have you seen the events Asa holds?  Classless.  She does not know.  Yet the holy priestess insists on having an opinion. So boring.

msmith76
msmith76

Nope. You are incorrect!  But maybe you are not used to throwing catered events.

melissa.landry
melissa.landry

 @michelle.nicholas.77  @Danny83 What part of Lilly and MJ not being friends did you not understand michelle? You sound ridicules. MJ did not RSVP to be rude and condescending and she said as much. Watch the episode again. MJ is late for everything. Her way of getting attention. You don't ever have to welcome someone who is so jealous of you that from the first time she saw you she has said nothing to say about you but rude and lewd comments. MJ classless azz would have arrived late and interrupted Lilly's party by bashing her. A recipe for disaster. So Michelle stop being so over dramatic.

katiedidmomsaid
katiedidmomsaid

 @michelle.nicholas.77  @Danny83

 why was her party ridiculous? because its something you couldn't/wouldn't do? that makes it different, not ridiculous. Mercedes admitted to viewing the evite and STILL did not rsvp. she only changed her mind the night before the party. why on earth would she, or ANYONE, expect lilly to go out of her way to accommodate, at best, an acquaintance...and at truth, a mean girl who has continually insulted her? yall crazy!

GirlFromKY
GirlFromKY

 @michelle.nicholas.77  @Danny83 Michelle, respectfully speaking Danny is the one who's right, not Asa regardless of how Lilly may/may not feel about MJ, ya know?  I see you're someone of intelligence who agrees with Danny too citing a failing RSVP courtesy within our culture which doesn't mean lack of etiquette should continue to be considered ok.  Also, don't you think it was rude for Asa to confront her hostess about such a matter to begin with?   Though we common-sensically know Lilly most likely had a bit of discretion about her decision, we also know MJ has created her own bad reputation for herself about being late, not showing up, etc., illustrating she's probably not the #1 guest you'd like on your list.  I mean, a formal and very expensive event is the LAST place anyone should have to put up with MJ's continued tactics, don't you think?   

ksabo1963
ksabo1963

 @michelle.nicholas.77  @LolaL Clearly Michelle you have no class your comments on here are so classless. IF you are invited to a party you RSVP she did not she called hours before the party and is pissy for not getting in - the only one with catty motives was MJ she looked at the evite 6 times yes 6 times.

PlasticPeggy
PlasticPeggy

 @michelle.nicholas.77  @LolaL no, Lilly invited her there as a courtesy. Because they have friends in the same circle.  but they are not friends. There is zero reason or motivation for Lilly to go further above and beyond for someone who has done nothing to be dismissive or rude to her.

msmith76
msmith76

Look that party was off th echain and they were all envious.  It beats anything REZA< ASA< GG, MJ Mike or any of those phonies ever did or ever could do.  Its clear who got the CACHE.  It is not them.

shivaperre
shivaperre

 @GirlFromKY  @michelle.nicholas.77  @Danny83 

 

If Mj would have RSVP'd she would have attended the party. Why should Lily go out of the way to accommodate others who lack common sense. These two are not friends, maybe Lily thought that MJ looking at the evite 6 times and not responding indicates her not wanting to come. Lily was already extending herself by inviting her in the first place (MJ didn't invite Lily to her bday, and also uninvited GG to mexico) when you extend yourself it would be nice if the person could at least acknowledge you.

What would have happened if Reza didn't tell MJ that she needs to RSVP to and RSVP evite? Would she just crash a guest list, invite only, black tie event ? who does that. The party was at the same caliber of a wedding and this ain't no wedding crashers.