You Need to See Katie Maloney-Schwartz's Takedown of Coachella

The #PumpRules SURver lists the many reasons she won't be attending the music festival this year.

As the world gears up for one of the biggest music festivals of the year when Coachella kicks off in Indio, California on April 14, we know one person who definitely won't be attending: Katie Maloney-Schwartz.

The Vanderpump Rules newlywed listed the reasons why she won't be attending Coachella this year on Twitter. And no, it doesn't have anything to do with NDAs. "I wish all my coachellers a safe and happy weekend. I will not be in attendance..... for a variety of reasons," Katie began a series of tweets early Thursday morning.

First of all, Katie said that it takes an incredible amount of work and money "to pull that sh** off." "And the pay off has depreciated exponentially over the years," she tweeted.

She's also just not a fan of seeing artists perform in a festival setting. "I have [seen] and could see the artists I really want to see in a proximity that is far more attractive than in a crowd of thousands," she wrote on Twitter.

Katie rocked a staple of many a Coachella ensemble, a beautiful floral crown, at her bridal shower. But she warned that, "Unless they are a gorgeous fresh arrangement... which is unlikely. Avoid completely."

She also tweeted that she is "allergic" to "the people and MOSTLY to selfies and self absorbed social media" that take place at Coachella.

So if you are attending Coachella this year, do it for the music and the art, according to Katie. "But of course there are those rare folk who flock to the desert and really indulge in the music and art and for those I will Revel in FOMO!" she gushed on Twitter.

In which case, she might take a page out of Lisa Rinna's book.

And for those of you wondering if "Tequila Katie" was responsible for these tweets, the SURver confirmed that these tweets are all hers.

Katie and the rest of the Vanderpump Rules crew will revisit more of this season's wild times during Part 3 of the reunion on Monday at 8/7c. Sneak a peek, below.

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