There isn't a single part of Patricia Altschul's Charleston home that is anything less than amazing. However, she does love some rooms more than others. "It's hard to say, but because I'm basically lazy I love my bedroom and my bathroom," the Southern Charm matriarch said of her favorite room in her house during a recent interview with Town & Country. "Maybe my bathroom is the best room in the house. I have a Jacuzzi tub and I have my big screen television and a fireplace, and the toilet is enclosed in a cabinet so you don't see it."
Of course, we've seen Patricia do a lot of entertaining in her abode over the seasons. We'll even score an invite to her highly anticipated Flamingo Party in Monday night's new episode of Southern Charm.
Though Patricia's soirees are always on point, even she has experienced an entertaining disaster or two, like at one past Christmas party. "I had a Smithfield ham station with biscuits but my basset hound managed to get the ham off of the kitchen counter and took it upstairs and ate it on the bed in the guest room!" Patricia told Town & Country.
Patricia is the arbiter of etiquette on Southern Charm, a job that seems to be harder and harder to do thanks to modern technology. "The rule used to be 'Don't put your elbows on the table,' but that is the least of it now. Today, people have two iPhones on the table and maybe an iPad on the seat next to them. It has gotten out of control. I have asked people to put away their cell phones because there is nothing ruder than to sit with someone who is cutting their steak and then poking at their iPhone to look at their tweets," Patricia said. "Social media is like an addiction and lot of people who would ordinarily be very thoughtful can just be disrespectful and thoughtless."
And no, she's not a fan of online dating, either. "There is not much that shocks me anymore, but I have to admit that I find that whole thing disturbing," Patricia said. "When a woman goes to a man's apartment because he has sent her an emoji of a piece of pizza and a glass of beer and they have sex and then the woman goes home the next day and never hears from the man again, I think it makes women feel bad and devalued. Men, I think, are impervious."
Or, as Patricia put it perhaps more dramatically on Southern Charm, "It's the end of Western civilization as far as I can tell."
In many ways, we would all probably be better off taking a page out of Patricia's book. And you might be able to look as fabulous as the Charleston socialite soon enough. "I buy my caftans from all over. I buy them from designers like Oscar de la Renta and Naeem Khan and I have bought them in India and in Morocco. But so many people have asked me about my caftans that I have started working on my own caftan line," she said, even giving a shoutout to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' caftan-filled trip to Dubai this season.
We'll raise a big gin martini to that news.
Take note of more of Patricia's words of wisdom, below.