Headed for the Big D? Not sure about your current partner? Nervous to walk down the aisle?
A set of questions, some odd, put together by a relationship expert can help you decide whether your partner is actually the right person for you. Many people are interested in the wedding, but not what comes after, Robert Scuka, the executive director of the National Institute of Relationship Enhancement, tekks The New York Times. The following list of questions can help avoid dark secrets and help you decide whether to marry or not—before it’s too late.
1. Did your family throw plates, calmly discuss issues or silently shut down when disagreements arose?
This will reveal how disagreements are dealt with.
2. Will we have children, and if we do, will you change diapers?
You have to honestly discuss children. Do you even want them?
3. Will our experiences with our exes help or hinder us?
Are you playing the compare game?
4. How important is religion? How will we celebrate religious holidays, if at all?
You must discuss your beliefs to avoid fights later on.
5. Is my debt your debt? Would you be willing to bail me out?
Uh, oh. Is that a new bag? Money talk.
6. What’s the most you would be willing to spend on a car, a couch, shoes?
Couples have to be honest about their cash flow.
7. Can you deal with my doing things without you?
As Beyonce likes to say, “All the women, independent, throw your hands up at me.”
8. Do we like each other’s parents?
How’s the dreaded mother-in-law? Or maybe she’s sweet as pie.
9. How important is sex to you?
The 'ol I have a headache isn’t gonna work.
10. How far should we take flirting with other people? Is watching pornography O.K.?
Discuss what and when is going too far.
11. Do you know all the ways I say “I love you”?
It’s not just verbal. We’re humans, and we’re all different.
12. What do you admire about me, and what are your pet peeves?
Let’s hope the gushing outweighs the nitpicking.
13. How do you see us 10 years from now?
If it’s broken up, find a new mate and head back to question one.
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