Ask Patti: Fairy Tale Love?

Patti dispels myths about finding a Prince Charming.

I am a 21 year old college student and am in a committed, monogamous relationship with my 28 year old boyfriend of 2 1/2 years. While I recognize I still have a lot of learning and growth to do, do you think that someone cannot experience true love at my age? Is it somehow wrong or naive of me to be excited about working towards this common goal? What "stage of life" (rather than specific age) do you think is best to enter into marriage?

Cat, you’re in a catch-22. On the one hand, you’re young and haven’t experienced life – you may be smart, but you have no wisdom. On the other hand, your heart is telling you you’re in love and that this is the ONE. The question you have to ask yourself is, “What’s more important to me… finishing the stage of life that is freedom, or taking the next step.” That’s a question you have to ask yourself seriously. The one thing you don’t want to do is take the wrong step.


Hi Patti!
I've just started watching your show, and now I'm addicted! I'm 21, and I've dated 6 gay men before, one being my ex-fiancé of two years. I'm usually the first person (even before their parents or friends) they "come out" to because they say I'm so accepting of people. I like a sensitive, well-kept man with my same interests (stereotypical of gay men). How can you tell if a guy is gay, or just metro? Why do gay men date women (if they say they knew all along?!) And WHY do they come out to ME? Thanks!

Dawn, STOP IT. There are PLENTY of well-kept men out in the world that aren’t gay. What, are you picking them up at gay bars? You know what you’re doing, and why you’re doing it. This sounds more like a person that is purposely sabotaging their own love life because they’re afraid to be in serious relationship more than anything else.

I watch Millionaire Matchmaker and wonder is there ever a Cinderella? Can't a rich man fall for a poor woman? I've been looking for my Prince. Hope he shows up soon. Don't men want a down to earth woman anymore? I'm 53 and cute as a button. Just want to find a great guy Patti. I know there are a lot of us out there.

Tough love time… life isn’t a fairy tale. We all want it to be, but it's not. You’re a cute 53 year old, great. Find a GOOD man with a GOOD job that wants to make you his world. Worry more about being rich in love – not living in a castle.

I've been dating someone for nearly a year and have no clue where it's heading or what it is. At times he makes me feel like a million, the other times not so much. What should I do, ride the waves or get out of the waters?

ASK HIM. COMMUNICATE. Become Your Own Matchmaker (my book) answers this common question. You need to read it. You need to be firm. You need to be in control.

Hey Patti,
Single male here. I'm viewed as attractive, funny, easy going. I never have trouble attracting women. The problem I run into is women are all looking for guys that are rich. I work but don't have the money to do the finer things in life. I just can't seem to attract the woman that I want because of my financial position.
Need Help!

Well, if the type of woman you want requires you to be in a better financial position, then get to work. Or start changing your expectations.

Hi Patti,
When will I stop feeling bad for breaking up with a good guy?

Right now...GET OVER IT! Life is too short, and by breaking up with someone you don’t want to be with – you did the best thing in the world for them.


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