Cast Blog: #MATCHMAKER

Bye-Bye Bradley, Hello Kitty

Making a Match: Crashing Chilli's Date!

Making a Match: Larry Birkhead & Melyssa Ford

Patti Turns NeNe's Bridesmaids to Brides

A Waste of a Good Mirror

Getting a Nice Guy for Rachel Uchitel

Breaking 'Matchmaker' History

Two Millionaires That Shouldn't Be Single

The Critical Dick Goes Home Alone

A Dorky Doc and a Hopeless Romantic

Carson Kressley, the Millionaire Whisperer

Patti's Vlog: Everyone Gets a Valentine!

Patti's Vlog: Patti's the Love Doctor

Patti's Vlog: Stefan Richter Tried to Date Patti!

A Bashful Beauty and a Not-So-Golden Oldie

A Shallow Old Dog and a Sweet River Rat

What Rosie Wants and a Gay Hugh Hefner

Great Expectations and the Running Man

Courtney Kerr and a Swedish Peacock

Sarcastic Cheban and a 'Man-diego' Bachelor

Sweetheart Swayze and a Virtual Phantom

Patti's Biggest, Most Tempting Mixer Yet

A Red-Hot Night for the Millionaires

Time for Some Spice: The Ginger Mixer!

Gaynor Gets the Girl (So Does Allison!)

Adam Gaynor Wins, Allison Baver Skates By

Patti Says Leave Boss at the Business

Chef K Wins One for the Lesbian Team

Mitch Berger, NFL Peter Pan, Grows Up

Johnny Out Sweets Yigit

Sweet Yigit Gets No Sugar on His Date

Just Robin Being Robin

Robin Kassner Gets Serious

The Rules According to Aimee

Matt "The Candy Man" Riviera

Time for Patti to Give Me a Raise

Skeet Shooting is a Bad Date Idea

Let the Man Be the Man on a Date

Irv's Nerve

Patti's Favorite Episode

My Favorite Client Ever

Bye-Bye Bradley, Hello Kitty

Rachel agrees with Bradley on one thing (and one thing only) and spills on Robin Kassner's comeback.

Here, Kitty-Kitty...

I have a joke for you…a pink kitty and a sleazy lawyer walk into a bar. OUCH! OK so I didn’t say it was going to be funny. Yes, that’s right, this week was just purr-fectly awful. Robin “Pink Kitty” was back, and ready to buy yet another man a Ducati all while giving him a little somethin’ somethin’ under a table. Oh joy. As if that wasn’t torture enough, I thought it would be just grand to bring back Bradley the schmuck who went out with Stephanie. Double joy. 

To recap, Bradley is in his 30s, a lawyer, has dated over 400 women, and has two thousand friends on Facebook. Oh, and you know that scene in My Cousin Vinnie when… Ah, just kidding, I won’t go there. This really was quite the looney-toon week for me, so I will go straight the nitty-gritty kitty. 

How amazing did our little Miss Meow look after her make-over?  No more alley cat: she turned out to be quite the refined feline. I cannot express how proud I was of Robin for choosing two normal guys, especially my personal favorite, Joseph. Dev, of course, flaked (I could tell he was not as into it as he played… guess he wasn’t Superman after all). The real hero was Joseph, with his coming out to save the day and being so sweet. Sadly, Robin stuck to her usual ways and wanted her hunk. Ah well, it’s back to the pound for her.

Back to Bradley: he chose the sweet Nicole, who was a great pick. Of course, once again, we get another sweaty date bouncing on trampolines.  This is something I would do with my three-year-old son, not something I would do on a date!  After the jumping and sweating and racing Brad showed his true colors at dinner with his lack of compliments and lousy wit.  The only thing I have to agree with Bradley about is that you don’t need to flaunt your cash to get the girl.  Sorry Patti, I have to side with douche-boy on this one.

Bradley, remember the scene in Jerry McGuire when she says, “You had me at hello?”  Well, you had us at goodbye.  Looks like it’s back to your two thousand Facebook pals and dating another 400 women for you.

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Patti Turns NeNe's Bridesmaids to Brides

Patti thinks it won’t be long before these two are following their friend Nene Leakes’ lead down the aisle.

Read Patti's full transcript after the jump!

OK, greatest week ever. We have my friend NeNe Leakes out here from Atlanta and she brought me the gift that keeps on giving, great women who are looking to be set up! So I’m doing NeNe a favor this week and we’re throwing her two eligible bridesmaids a mixer to top all mixers. These girls are gonna get hooked up, and if they play their cards right, they might end up with a handsome man on their arm.

So let’s get this started. NeNe introduces me to Dawn Robinson and Diana Gowins. Diana is the mothering type. Not just a little bit, she could out-mother Mother Teresa. I get where she’s coming from, she’s an ex-nurse, she’s got three kids, she’s a nurturer. But she’s got a problem: she over-nurtures and that gives the guys the wrong signal, especially when they start dating. A man doesn’t want his date to be a mother until they have some children together. Until then, she’s his hot wife and Diana’s got to lead with the sexy and bring the mothering to the table later. That one’s easy.

Dawn is a little tougher. She’s tall, gorgeous, but also really intellectually smart, and she knows it. She’s got a high finance job, and she doesn’t need a man telling her anything. Well, there’s the problem because a man needs to at least feel like he’s worth something. So Dawn doesn’t need to play dumb, but she also doesn’t need to intimidate the guy or drive over the guy like a competitive tank commander. Alpha women are tough to change, but I can sometimes get them to put away the alpha from time to time to lure a man in. And if Dawn listens to me and tries not to compete with the guy right out of the gate, she’ll be happy she did because the guys will come to her like bees to honey.

So NeNe and I have our work cut out for us this week and we set up a recruiting so NeNe could help me pick out fine gentlemen for her friends. It was a really good idea. She knows what they like, but she’s also honest and knows what they tend to do, and what men aren’t right for them.

NeNe helped us pick the right men, and I think it was worth it because we had a great mixer. The mixer was a classy affair at The Mark and everybody had a great time. The men were respectful but they also were having fun. NeNe and I kept an eye on things, making sure Diana didn’t try to mother anybody out of the door and that Dawn kept her man eating claws inside.  Both girls did great, and by the end each had chosen a great guy, Dawn had Isaac eating out of the palm of her hand and Diana had Dante right where she wanted him staring right back at her.

And because these two are best friends, we decided to let them have a little back up. They all went out together on a double date. The guys were told to plan the date, and Isaac and Dante did great. They got Louis Van Amstel from Dancing With The Stars to give them salsa dancing lessons and then they also had a romantic rooftop winter wonderland dinner where they actually made it snow. Which in L.A. is kind of amazing.

At the end of the week, I think both girls had a really great time. Time will tell, but I think it won’t be long before these two are following their friend Nene’s lead and dancing down their own aisles. And they’ll just have me and NeNe to thank. Well, you’re welcome girls. 

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