Cast Blog: #MATCHMAKER

A Dorky Doc and a Hopeless Romantic

Making a Match: Crashing Chilli's Date!

Making a Match: Larry Birkhead & Melyssa Ford

Patti Turns NeNe's Bridesmaids to Brides

A Waste of a Good Mirror

Getting a Nice Guy for Rachel Uchitel

Breaking 'Matchmaker' History

Two Millionaires That Shouldn't Be Single

The Critical Dick Goes Home Alone

Carson Kressley, the Millionaire Whisperer

Patti's Vlog: Everyone Gets a Valentine!

Patti's Vlog: Patti's the Love Doctor

Patti's Vlog: Stefan Richter Tried to Date Patti!

A Bashful Beauty and a Not-So-Golden Oldie

A Shallow Old Dog and a Sweet River Rat

What Rosie Wants and a Gay Hugh Hefner

Great Expectations and the Running Man

Courtney Kerr and a Swedish Peacock

Sarcastic Cheban and a 'Man-diego' Bachelor

Sweetheart Swayze and a Virtual Phantom

Patti's Biggest, Most Tempting Mixer Yet

A Red-Hot Night for the Millionaires

Time for Some Spice: The Ginger Mixer!

Gaynor Gets the Girl (So Does Allison!)

Adam Gaynor Wins, Allison Baver Skates By

Patti Says Leave Boss at the Business

Chef K Wins One for the Lesbian Team

Mitch Berger, NFL Peter Pan, Grows Up

Johnny Out Sweets Yigit

Sweet Yigit Gets No Sugar on His Date

Just Robin Being Robin

Bye-Bye Bradley, Hello Kitty

Robin Kassner Gets Serious

The Rules According to Aimee

Matt "The Candy Man" Riviera

Time for Patti to Give Me a Raise

Skeet Shooting is a Bad Date Idea

Let the Man Be the Man on a Date

Irv's Nerve

Patti's Favorite Episode

My Favorite Client Ever

A Dorky Doc and a Hopeless Romantic

Patti can lead her millionaires to a golf course, but can't make them hit a hole in one.

Read Patti's full transcript after the jump!

What a week! My first millionaire is Dr. Emil Chynn, he’s a super smart eye surgeon who lives in Manhattan, but can’t find love. What gives? His problem is he’s so technical minded, he has no idea how to romance a woman. No freakin’ idea. He even has a list of all the requirements a woman has to meet before they can date. It’s like a page long. That’s not how you find love, that’s how you hire an employee. 

My other millionaire, Daniel Passov. He’s tall, handsome, Jewish, and owns a successful t-shirt company in San Diego. Why hasn’t someone snatched him up already? These type of guys are never single. Daniel’s problem is that he’s more in love with the idea of meeting a woman in some magical Hollywood moment than he is in actually building a relationship. I need to get him to stop being moonstruck and start doing the work to build a lasting relationship like the one his parents have. Times are different, it doesn’t just fall into your lap like magic. 

Daniel ends up selecting Ariel for his master date. She’s perfect for him: beautiful, smart, ambitious, Jewish. She’s even spent time in Israel. Daniel takes her to make her own perfume, which is such an awesome date idea. I loved it. They both had a great time. I hope it’s not too long before Daniel’s stepping on the glass. Mazel tov!

Dr. Chynn picked Stephanie, a beautiful psychologist. This should be a slam dunk, but Dr. Chynn blows it. Shocker. He starts grilling her with questions like, "How soon does she want to have kids?" This is a first date, not a job interview. 

At least Dr. Chynn realizes what he did wrong. Hopefully on the next date he can actually bring some subtly and romance. I can lead the doctor to the gold course, but I can’t force him to hit a hole in one. 

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Making a Match: Larry Birkhead & Melyssa Ford

Find out what Patti really thought about sexy Melyssa and shy guy Larry's dates.

This week I got to meet one of the sweetest guys in the world, Larry Birkhead: the boy from Kentucky. There’s just one problem: he hasn’t dated in like a decade. This guy needs practice. I mean, he’s drop dead gorgeous and he can’t do anything. I can send him out into the world and the world of a mixer and a date, but he could botch it. Candace and I will give him some mock dating experience and I will pick his date for him. The first time he’ll meet her will be when they go out for the first time. No chance for him to get nervous, and more importantly, no time for the girl to look him up and see who he is. He can stand on his own two feet and just be himself, not Anna Nicole’s ex.

He can stand on his own two feet and just be himself, not Anna Nicole’s ex.

My other client this week is drop dead gorgeous: Melyssa Ford. She’s the star of Blood Sweat and Heels, she used to be in a bunch of music videos, and she was nicknamed the "Video Vixen". I know it’s hard to turn off the beauty and the booty, so I bring her to doctor Pat Allen. Doctor Pat and I have worked together for years. Doctor Pat told Melyssa that she should be leading with her brain. Melyssa can be sexy no matter what: but can she look for the guy who’s interested in what she has to say, not what she looks like?

So I’m doing something new: I get Candace and David to bring a bunch of good appropriate men and women to the mixer. I just want a handful of guys for Melyssa, and a handful of girls for Larry. I introduce the best ones to Melyssa for her to choose from, and I’ll pick the best girl to set up Larry with on a blind date. Melyssa picks Jay. Jay listened to the conversation, and remembered Melyssa liked bowling and cigars. And he took her on a perfect, fun, get-to-know-you date. Meanwhile, Larry met up with his date at Universal Studios. He had a private tour set up, and he and Michelle met for the first time. They had a blast. She knew who he was, but they got past that and they got to know each other. And he took her for dinner and even got a kiss at the end.

So in the end, I’m so happy that both Larry and Melyssa got to learn something. Larry got to know he can be himself and there’s no need to be shy, and she knows (Melyssa) that there are guys out there who can look past her booty and see the great girl underneath.

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