Cast Blog: #RHOA

Meet the Family

Cynthia: I Knew I Had to Take My Audition Seriously

Kenya: I'm More Empathetic Toward Apollo

Claudia on Her Breakdown

Kandi: "Apollo Wasn't Thinking Clearly"

GIF Recap: Chocolate Goodness

Kandi's Devastating News

Phaedra: I Knew What I Needed to Do

Claudia: I'm Not Trying to Be Porsha's Friend

Kenya on Her Pilot

GIF Recap: Dish Nation Divided

Cynthia on Her Drama-Free Trip

Has Kenya Found Love?

Claudia: Kordell was Barely Flirting

Kenya on NeNe's "Embarrassing" Behavior

Claudia: "These Double Standards are Killing Me"

Kandi: "I'm Not Two-Faced"

Phaedra: I Appreciated Demetria's Apology

Are Demetria and Phaedra Cool?

NeNe on Her Apology

Cynthia: Claudia Can Read with the Best of Them

Claudia: NeNe's Behavior Needed to Be Checked

Kenya on "The Beasts"

Phaedra: Demetria Took Things Too Personally

GIF Recap: Lessons in Reading

Phaedra's Ignorant Comments

Claudia: I'm Not Surprised by NeNe's Ugly Demeanor

Kenya: NeNe Doesn't Want to Like Me

Cynthia: I'm Moving Forward in Grace and Love

Kandi: "I Wasn't Trying to Set Demetria Up"

Phaedra on Being Recognized by the Bar

NeNe: "I'm Not a Fake Friend"

Demetria Responds to the Rumors

Cynthia: Forgiveness is a Process

Phaedra: My Mother is My Rock

Kenya: "An Acknowledgement is Not an Apology"

Claudia: I Do Not Own a Flip Phone

Cynthia: It Was Awkward Seeing Phaedra Uncomfortable

Demetria: I Have No Beef with Kenya

NeNe Explains the Wig

Phaedra: I Was Hoping Apollo Wouldn't Create a Scene

Meet the Family

Kandi talks about Kim, NeNe, and Sheree's confrontation, and her relationship with her mom.

Well, well, well... tonight the 2nd episode aired and I watched it with my mother. Before I start talking about my scenes I guess I'll discuss everybody else's scenes first.

Now let me say this: I LOVE Lisa, but seeing her and Ed getting in the bath tub together was a bit much for me...LOL. I don't know why, but the whole romantic scene didn't feel right to me. Maybe because the whole time I'm thinking about how the camera crew is in the room. Were they naked for real in the tub??? Or did they have on swimwear??? I will have to ask Lisa about that the next time we talk.

OK, I also wanna say that I LOVE Nene's husband Gregg. Nene, not so much (LOL), but Gregg is great! I love the way he is always so diplomatic and a peacemaker. The way he breaks things down just really make you say, "Yeah, he's right." Did anyone else laugh when Nene was talking about apologizing for something and he said, "What does that sound like?" and she said "What?" and he said "you apologizing." That was funny to me.

So that brings me to the dinner with Kim and Nene. They looked like they have fun together. I wonder how many drinks they had when Nene decided to do the boobie squeeze. That looked crazy as hell. LOL...I wonder what sparked that. And did she light weight throw Sheree under the bus with the nose job line??? I'm not trying to be messy but when she said it, I was automatically thinking, "Is that true?" and if it is true, is she OK with the world knowing? Not that it's a big deal, because it isn't. But we all know stuff like that is a sensitive subject for some people.

Now let me just skip to the dinner with the three of them at the end. Kim and Sheree going back and forth about what they did and did not say about Nene was crazy. I don't know for sure but in my opinion I think they both probably said things. They've both had disagreements with Nene in the past and when people are mad they do say things that they sometimes regret later. Sometimes the ladies on this show make comments about each other that are below the belt. Meaning, it's one thing to say she's crazy, or I don't like her, or she lies a lot, or whatever... but it's a whole notha story to tell people's personal secrets for the world to hear. At least it is if you've been friends or have a history with each other. It reminds me of what my mama always told me, "Watch Out For Mad Day." For those of you who have never heard that saying, it's when you become friends or "good associates" with someone and you share personal things with them. And then the first day they get mad they go telling all your business! Hence the term Mad Day...

And I really wish Kim didn't swear on her kids lives and say, "Strike them dead if I'm lying." I hate when people do that. It made me cringe when she said that. Kim, from now on if they don't believe you, don't even worry about it. It's not that serious. You don't owe them all that. I understand you wanted to make it clear how much you meant what you were saying, but don't let them have you go there. By the way, how many times do they mention Kim's name? Is it me, or is every conversation they have about her? Maybe it was just this episode.

OK enough about them. It's time to get on myself. Everybody says don't read the blogs, but I can't help it. I'm addicted! When I first signed on to do the show a lot of the blogs really went in on A.J. I felt really bad because I expect them to say crazy things about me, but for some reason I didn't think about all the negative feedback he'd get. I was sad that my decision to be on the show brought so much drama into his life and into the lives of his kids and their mothers. There were times he said that he hated that I even signed on to do the show. Call me dumb, but I didn't think he would be such a big story...LOL. Now prior to me becoming "The New Housewife" I was already having issues with my mom accepting my relationship with A.J. The things that came up on the blogs only made it worse.

Speaking of my mom. So, you guys got to meet the family. What did ya think? It's funny looking back at that day. That was actually my first day of taping and we had a huge emotional blow out. There were way more things said and way more tears than they showed. I'm sure you can tell we are very close. My mom is the youngest of 14 kids, and yes, all by the same mother. All born and bred right here in ATL. Wasn't it too funny when my Aunt Bertha started naming all my other living aunts and uncles "Aunt Nora, Uncle Ralph, Aunt Hazel, Uncle Bebo, Uncle Booley ..." She was the star tonight for me! When she said "and if it don't work out TO HELL WIT IT!" I loved that line. She's the "Caroline" of our family. "Our family is as thick as thieves!" I can so relate to them (the New Jersey Housewives for those of you who don't know who I'm talking about.) My mom wasn't hearing any of that -ish Aunt Bertha, Aunt Nora, or I was talking about though. Uncle Ralph was trying to be neutral. I gotta tell ya'll this - it's too funny. Aunt Bertha is singing a different tune now. She called my mom's tonight and said, "I need to go in the backyard and dig up some dog sh*t for siding with that relationship!" OMG! Hilarious!!! I couldn't do anything but laugh. I call them the black golden girls and she's the one always saying crazy stuff like Sophia.

Watching that episode makes me teary-eyed every time. Even though it was months ago and so much has gone on since then, I still feel the emotion of that moment. There was so much strain on my relationship with my mom at that time. It was killing me! I understand how she feels about not wanting me to marry a man with that many children, but the part when I said "I'd rather have a man with a bunch of kids that showed them all love than a man with only one child that he never talks about and doesn't spend time with," I meant that. I've been getting so many people that hit me up and say "Listen to your mother, don't do it!" I appreciate all the love and your concern, but don't worry about me because like Aunt Bertha said, if it don't work out, my family will be there to help pick up the pieces...

Much Love,

P.S. Did I just write a book or what?! I promise it won't be this long next time.

Claudia on Her Breakdown

Claudia Jordan explains what really brought her to tears. Are you loving your apartment now that’s decorated?
Claudia Jordan: I love my place, but it's not quite where I want it to be yet. In my other houses and apartments I'd be so fast to get my places together in the first few days I'm in there, but honestly I've been so busy with the transition to Atlanta and my new job that I haven't really been as on point as I'd like. And that's been across the board -- with my hair, clothes, apartment, etc. It's just been a bit overwhelming with working on the radio show five days a week plus appearances, live remotes, as well as my other work I do for CNN/Headline News and my podcast. My day starts at 5am and goes until 11pm some nights. But in my few spare moments here and there I was able to get some crystal chandeliers installed that I love! I bought that amazing black chair from Modani (the furniture store Kenya and I shopped at) and a few other items. I still want to get some accent walls painted and a few more pieces and then I'll have my place where I want it to be. I actually love decorating but at this point in the game I still didn't even know where to go to shop! But it's getting there! Why did you break down when discussing the Porsha situation with Kenya and Cynthia?
CJ: Really I was not crying about Porsha or the fact that I'm biracial! There was such a buildup of so many things that it just took one little thing to push me over the top. I am not that emotionally invested in Porsha, and if you ever catch me getting there, please take me out to pasture and put me out of my misery! Let's be very clear -- like crystal clear -- I am not jealous of Porsha, she has nothing I want or couldn't get if I wanted it. I do not want her life, hair, body, mouth, or situation. I've never been the type of woman that couldn't co-exist with successful women. I've never had the need to be the "star" in my group of friends. I actually like to surround myself with women that are upwardly mobile, intelligent, fabulous, successful, independent, and inspirational. So to suggest jealousy over a woman that only has more material items than me for now is laughable.

Again, being the new girl on the block on the radio show was extremely stressful. I had to sit in the seat and take over the position of a very beloved radio personality that's by far one of the best in the business. To say her fans were upset was an understatement, and that's totally understandable! It was pretty much a no-win situation for me. And I was very aware of what folks were saying. Now all I wanted to do was work and collect my check and go home with as little drama as possible. I was trying to fit in with a new crew in a new city; I had to leave my friends and family up north, and honestly I was overwhelmed and the move was bittersweet.

So when I was pulled aside by several people at the station and told they noticed the tension and it was making folks whisper and feel some type of way, honestly even though I knew it wasn't something I was doing, I kind of panicked. I so did not want to be that chick bringing drama to a new job. That and only that was the reason I asked Porsha to lunch in the first place and even bit my tongue that day when she was acting like a child at the table deflecting and discussing lotion in the middle of a talk. You guys now know I have no problems reading a chick, and looking back I think some can appreciate and acknowledge just how much I held back that day. I mention it to say this: I only held back to really try to make things be cool between us at work. You saw Porsha was being shady as hell to me at work way before Puerto Rico. So when I came for her on the bus it was beyond justified. It was a buildup and I let out all the things I had held back in all of our other interactions that she brought upon herself. So yes, my crying was not about being biracial and it was not over Porsha. I was stressed and sick of all the B.S. that was coming my way, and it was a culmination of lots of things. Basically I was over it. Was it awkward when Ricky pulled in Porsha to try and smooth things over between the two of you?
CJ: Hell yeah it was awkward! I did not go to Rickey to talk about Porsha! I handled Porsha just fine without anyone else's assistance and did not need back up. She is not a tough cookie to crack. I went to get feedback about my progress with the show, and when Rickey decided to bring Porsha in, it frustrated me because I didn't think it would be productive, and again, I wasn't there for that! But at the same time it's Rickey's show, and if he felt the tension (and he admitted he did) and wanted to see if he could help, then who am I to tell the man that gave me a job what to do regarding his show?

I never brought up Porsha's name. She's right about one thing -- we don't work together (besides the episodes of Dish Nation when the show asked me to come on), but we do work in the same space with the same people, who are casualties of our issues. I was fine with us ignoring each other in the hallway, but when it got to the point where folks are pulling me aside telling me it was getting weird for them and I wouldn't want that getting to Rickey, then I'm going to do my part to make it better. We both owe it to Rickey and the rest of the employees that are affected. Period. Point blank. If Porsha wants to play fake and act like I'm imagining things, that's fine. But at the end of the day, it is what it is. And the truth is the truth. I do not operate in the land of make believe; I tend to live in a thing called the real world. So I don't regret anything I've done, because I've done it with purpose and with no shady ulterior motives. I'm a realist and that's that!

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