Auto Tune, Sex, and Magic
Kandi gives us a triple header and dishes on the past three episodes.
Hey everyone! I'm sorry I'm behind on my blogs. I've been doing a lot of traveling in support of my album, Kandi Koated, that will be in stores on December 14th. I'm also on tour with Fantasia and Eric Benet. So this week I need to comment on episodes 4, 5, and 6.
The boughetto episode was hilarious! I feel kind of bad for Phaedra this year. In person I think Phaedra is a really cool and a fun person to be around, but I don't think that shows on camera. I know that Peter was heated when Phaedra said she married Apollo because she wanted a "clean man," implying that Peter might not be so clean because of his multiple children. I have to admit I was laughing out loud when Cynthia said, "The only way her man is cleaner than mine is when he's taking showers in prison." That was funny. The whole baby shower thing was comedy to me. I was cracking up at the ballerinas, the waltz that she did with Dwight, the rose bush in her hair, and obviously the damn rhinestone eyelashes she was rocking! All that together was the perfect definition of BOUGHETTO! They need to put that word in Webster's Dictionary. I'm sure plenty of people would use it!
In episode five you got an opportunity to see my show Kandi Koated Nights. It's a late night talk show I do for fun with my friends every hump day, Wednesday at 10pm on www.KandiKoatedNight.com. We talk openly and honestly about sex and relationships. A lot of people are uncomfortable talking about sex. I am not one of those people. I noticed a lot of people were really thrown off by the fact that my Mom and I can talk about sex and even discuss dildos. Well, I personally think it's great that my Mom and I have this closeness, and we can talk about anything. Some of you all should try it! Anyway, I discussed the controversial sugar trick! It works! I've told plenty of people about it, and they all report back after trying it with great results! I'm not gonna break down the directions in this blog. Start watching Kandi Koated Nights if you want some HOT tips for the bedroom!
When Nene came to the dinner at Cynthia's with the new and improved nose, I was caught off guard. Nobody told me that she had gone under the knife. At first no one was even saying anything about it, and I was looking around thinking, "Why is nobody saying anything? Don't they don't see it?" I didn't feel like I should say anything, because she and I aren't close, and it's not my business. But I was so happy when Sheree said addressed it, because I couldn't take it anymore. It was the elephant in the room. I thought it was really cool that my Mom and NeNe bonded during the conversation about NeNe's marriage. My Mom really didn't like Nene ever since last year, when Nene and I got into it. So it was good that they had a break through, because that could have easily gone in a different direction and I'm over the drama. One more thing about the dinner. When Nene said she doesn't do oral sex and all that extra stuff in the bed room, and Peter said that's why they might be having problems in their marriage, I agree! I'm not married, and I know I've got a lot to learn, but what I do know is, "What you won't do, another will!" You're supposed to keep the bedroom exciting! Who wants to be married to someone for 14 years and be unsatisfied. That SUCKS! I wouldn't. I'm not saying that's the whole problem in their situation, because I'm sure it's not, but I'm sure it's not helping the relationship either. Just sayin'.
Ok last thing about episode 5, Phaedra and the PICKLES! I know her husband wanted to kill himself when he watched that episode, and they both were sucking on the pickle on each end. And to add insult to injury, the photographer had to say, "You can suck it, you don't have to chew" I had to rewind that about 5 times in a row! That was hilarious!
Now on to episode 6! Kim singing in the studio was hilarious! Certain things should not be seen on TV. But in Kim's defense, she's not the only artist that has to use auto tune. The thing is you don't get to hear it beforehand when other artists do it. All you hear is the finished product. I think with the world getting to hear the "before" version of Kim instead of just the "after" makes people want to dog her out, but please believe there are a lot of songs that have been doctored up and shot to #1 without you guys even knowing the difference. A lot of work is put into making the songs turn out the way they do. With that being said, I was pissed when I first found out that Kim had been telling people that she hated the song behind my back. First of all, I told her when I first played her the song that I was still working on it. When we gave her the cd, I told her not to play it for anybody yet. So when I heard she was playing it for other people. I was annoyed. Not to mention she's playing it for NeNe as if she's got some type of production background that makes her a good judge. Let me finish before you start taking a poll on my work! I was doing her a favor, and then she has me looking crazy. Trust and believe that If I couldn't get her to sing the song well enough for me to put it through auto tune and add a little magic to make it hot, then I wouldn't ever let the song be heard. This is not a hobby for me. I know what I'm doing, but in the end you will see how it turns out. So keep watching!
Moving on. Were you guys pleasantly surprised by Lawrence's voice? Just wait and see how that song turns out too!
This season just gets better and better, please believe it! Follow me on twitter @Kandi and become a fan of my store Tags Boutique on Facebook. Watch Kandi Koated Nights on Wednesdays. I'll be posting a new song for you to preview from my album Kandi Koated every sunday night on my website KandiOnline.com. The album comes out on December 14th, so please support your girl! Oh yeah! Come check me out on tour with Fantasia! The show is awesome!