Cast Blog: #RHOA

Happy One-Year Anniversary!

Cynthia Bailey recounts her eventful one-year anniversary party.

Yes, Peter and I have been married for over a year now. I know most couples don't usually celebrate one year of marriage with a black tie party, but under the circumstances I thought it was a very sweet gesture on Peter's part. This past year has been filled with our share of ups and downs, and I really thought it would  be nice to celebrate our one year anniversary with friends and family. Um, well you can't blame us for trying. In life, some things don't always work out the way you plan them.

The party was wonderful, and everyone seemed to have a good time. Except Sheree of course. For some reason no matter what we do, Sheree never has a good time at our events. I'm not really sure why she even bothers to come. Oh, maybe since she had already decided that she was going to have a horrible time, it would at least be a great opportunity to bring Lawrence to confront Marlo about the whole F-word issue. From the look on her face, she clearly enjoyed every single minute of it. I guess it wasn't a waste of her gas after all. What kind of person comes to a party just to be negative about everything? I would rather she stayed  home, than show up late and be mean. The invite was a courtesy -- her presence was not mandatory.  Peter looked especially handsome, and with the exception of the loud whistle to get everyone's attention for the toast, he did an excellent job. All the men looked very nice in their suits, and the ladies were stunning. Kandi looked "smoking hot" in her little disco number, Marlo gave us "princess," and of course NeNe walked into the room and owned it in her long, flowing maxi style print dress. Despite the fact that Sheree was bored after five seconds of being at the party, and could not believe there was no one to open the door for her because she was late, I thought she looked nice. My mom looked 20 years younger in her long ponytail, my BFF Kithe was dashing, and Mal was simply a "show stopper." Literally. The food was delicious, and the Ciroc flowed all night. Thank you, Peter, for all your efforts. I know that you wanted to make this a night to remember, and it certainly was!

I love Mal. She is my sister which makes her family by birth. Peter is my husband which makes him family by marriage. Family is family, and I love them both very much. However, family relationships have to have boundaries. Peter has to respect my family and my family has to respect Peter. And our marriage! That's how it usually works. I respect my sister's marriage, and I do not involve myself in the inner workings of her relationship. We are both grown women, and are responsible for own lives and the choices that we make. My sister and I are close, but we don't agree on everything. We didn't when we were younger, and we don't now that we are grown. As Mal's sister, my role is to be there when she needs me & mind my business when she doesn't. I expect the same. We will always be sisters, and will always have each other's backs. It was not exactly a shocker that Kim did not attend the party. She is an associate, not a friend. The invite was a courtesy, same as the baby shower invite. I often get invited to outings amongst the girls that I choose to attend out of respect, not desire. In hindsight, Kim's absence was actually a small blessing. I'm sure nothing would have been good enough for her, and she would have brought her own bottle of wine. Again! Bottom line is, Kim wasn't really trying to be friends with me before the whole "African baby" comment, so I really didn't expect things to be any different after we came back. My comment was my opinion for the hundredth time, not a fact. I don't know her well enough to say what she would do and wouldn't do. But have no problem giving my opinion. Maybe one day we will sit down as grown women, and put all nonsense behind us.  As for the "one year marriage" comment, my family has earned  the right to voice their opinion in regards to my life because we are family. Agree or disagree, at the end of the day, they have my back. A bit overprotective? Yes, but at least its coming from a pure place. Kim on the other hand couldn't care less, so her little two cents is not as welcomed. Again, we are not friends, and owe each other nothing. Anyway, it's a free world, and everyone is entitled to their opinion. With every opinion, comes a response. Why is it that people feel they can say hurtful things about a person, and then almost bust a blood vessel when that person responds to the foolishness? As always, I wish Kim's marriage a thousand years of happiness! All marriages, even the "perfect" ones actually require work. I'm am just amazed that some of the marriages that looked so "perfect" on the outside have sadly ended in divorce. Hopefully for both of us, love will conquer all!

I love Peter, and if I didn't want to be with him, I would not have married him. I don't need to defend my marriage to anyone, and don't expect anyone to defend theirs to me. I have managed to live a very successful life for the past 45 years, and God willing I will happily live at least 45 more. I married Peter because I always follow my heart. I could have married a million very easily,  but the heart wants what the heart wants. At my age most of my friends are married, and they have all been through ups and downs in their relationship. They all have borrowed money from each other, and it is never a big deal because they are partners. The only difference between them and us is that our marriage is on TV, and theirs is not. Our marriage will always be "a work in progress" because we are both very set in our ways & usually have a different point of view on things. We could choose to only share our lovey-dovey moments, but do not. That's easy, its the real life day-to-day issues that are the hardest to put out there. Just sayin'.The limo ride to the party wasn't really a factor since the limo never actually turned up. However, I willl address it anyway. Peter did not want Mal to ride with us to the party. I agree with Peter on this one. What would be the point? If Peter irritates Mal like she said he does, why would she want to ride the same car with him anyway? Peter set up the limo ride to be this romantic moment that we would share together as husband and wife before the party. Champagne and chocolate-covered strawberries included. Where does Mal fit into the equation? Even if she did get along with Peter, it wouldn't make sense. It wasn't Mal's one year anniversary, it was mine. 

Thank you:

Mark for extending your beautiful home to us. You are a sweetheart!

Ivan for introducing us to Mark, and for being a loving, supportive friend.

Tony Conway for always making our events absolutely wonderful! You are an angel.

Kithe Brewster for flying all the way from Beirut to be by my side. You put the "f" in the word friend. 

NeNe for helping Peter plan the party. You always give us so much positive love and support. You give so much and ask for nothing in return. You are a great friend, and you always show up!

 

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Claudia: I Felt Good About the Reunion

Claudia Jordan shares her thoughts on NeNe Leakes' breakdown and the reunion as a whole.

Bravotv.com: What was going through your mind when NeNe walked off?
Claudia Jordan: Well the reunion was quite an experience. When NeNe walked off, initially I wasn't sure what was going on to be honest. But I did notice she seemed to be trembling, so I knew she was definitely feeling something very real to her. I just didn't know what set her off at that point. So at first I was a little taken back. I had never seen her cry, but we are all human and everyone has their breaking point.

Bravotv.com: Do you think NeNe had a real breakthrough?
CJ: I honestly did think at that moment she really did. Her demeanor was different afterwards. And I even heard from her after the show. That to me was a good sign that perhaps we could all really move forward and start fresh. I know I'm always open to squash some beef, especially if it's nothing deep rooted and something surface. I don't see why not. But like I said on the show, we all have a story and things that we have had to deal with and overcome. I think we need to not think our problems are bigger than the next woman's and respect one another's struggles -- whether we think they are major or minor. One woman's problems are not more important than the rest. And I think if we can all learn to be sensitive to the next woman, then we are on our way. Hopefully that moment was the catalyst for change in NeNe and in others as well.

Bravotv.com: Do you feel like everyone ended the reunion in a better place?
CJ: I'd like to think so. I do think some will probably never be open for change and are just stuck in their own way, while others really took advantage of the opportunity to take something from it all. I'm not going to worry about those that do not wish to grow and move forward. I will just focus and give energy to likeminded individuals that want to get along, move forward, grow, learn, and progress. I know I felt good about the reunion. I know I didn't chime in a whole lot. And I think I had good reason. You don’t get to see everything, but I felt it was important to let the people who had real issues with each other hash it out with no outside opinions, just like I said in the Philippines. When people interject their opinions and thoughts when it’s not their issue, it just adds confusion to the situation. One of the cast members in particular is good for that. Always adding "well I think..." when it has absolutely nothing to do with her, and I feel those extra unnecessary comments can potentially add fuel to the fire and then there is no coming back. So if my silence was going to help the progress of the group moving forward, then I will take that "L."

Yes, it's "cute" to "read" and get in an epic one liner or rant, but sometimes you just need to shut the hell up and let folks deal with each other and let them do them. I have no problems with that. Plus my opinion on everyone’s situation doesn't need to always be heard -- I wish more of us felt the same way. I will say that this seemed to be a great starting point for folks to move forward and put their money where their mouths are when it comes to being a grown ass woman. I really hope everyone wants to. It'd be great to see how things could go if we spent less time fussing and more time co-existing peacefully. #ThatIsAll

 

As the season has come to an end for me, I just wanted to say wow! What a roller coaster ride it has been! I had no idea getting into this that any of it would happen. I thought I'd come on board, have a little fun, bring a little light-hearted fun, and make some new acquaintances. This show is huge and everywhere I go people come up to me and say such amazingly sweet things, and I am truly humbled when they tell me how they can relate to me and appreciate my realness. I was particularly touched when a teenage boy who was gay and biracial that had always felt like an outsider reached out to me talking about suicidal thoughts he had. We spoke and I was beyond moved when he told me that he could relate to some of the things I spoke about and that I somehow inspired and encouraged him to keep going. Those are the moments that make all the drama and fussing and fighting truly worth it. I want to continue to use this amazing platform for important issues. Again I thank Andy, Carlos, Joy, Lauren, Stephen, the entire cast and crew for this amazing opportunity. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

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