Cast Blog: #RHOA

The Kash Debate

Kandi answers your questions about being late to NeNe's dinner and the conflict with Kim over the name Kash.

Well last night’s episode was another episode that had Twitter on fire! LOL! I had so many people asking me what’s up with me and NeNe. They were telling me how horrible we were for showing up late to NeNe’s event and so on and so on. It seemed like people were mad at me for ALL OF US being late.



OK let me just share my opinion about the situation. First off, yes, it’s wrong to be super late to a dinner. I know that. There is no excuse to be that late. I’m not saying it is cool for us to be that late. We all (except for Cynthia) typically have a problem with being on time, including NeNe. I can recall many times when NeNe has showed up super late to different things we were doing, so that’s why I was surprised that she was snapping so hard. When she said on the phone that she wanted us to turn around and not come, I was OK with that. I can’t remember whose bright idea it was to go over there anyway. We were rolling as a group, so if that’s what they wanted to do, then fine, but we all were tired and hungry (not just me, but I was the most vocal about it). We had a five hour flight that got us to LA smack in the middle of rush hour traffic. It took over two hours to get to the house NeNe rented for us. When we got to the house, there wasn’t anything to eat there. We still had to wait on Phaedra to get there before we left for NeNe’s house. NeNe waited with us a little while before she even went back home. She couldn’t have left before 8:30 for what was a 9:00 dinner, so she knew we would be late. Nonetheless there’s a major difference being an hour late and being three hours late.

I didn’t even change clothes, because I was ready to go. I have no idea what took so long, but it wasn’t me this time. I remember it took Phaedra a while to get there and that was the main reason for the wait, but other than that I can’t recall what took us so long to leave. By the time we did leave I was STARVING.  When I’m hungry I get moody, silly acting, and my patience is super short. When we got to her house and saw her waiting outside to go off on us, I was like really? Why are we standing here and begging this woman to let us in her house? This is stupid! Even though we were late, I did feel like she could’ve still let us come in. I would have let them in if it were me. When I was walking over and peeping in the window, I was being silly. My point was if I came all this way to see you, then I need to see something dammit! LOL!  But when I saw that some of the guests were still there, it pissed me off. At that point I felt like she was trying to show out on us in front of her LA friends. If it was over and everyone was gone, OK cool, but if people are still here, why can’t we come in? So I was done looking like a fool in her driveway, and I was ready to go find something to eat at that point. Looking back the best thing to do would have been to go straight to NeNe’s house after we got to LA and just let Phaedra meet us there. Then we wouldn’t have been late, NeNe wouldn’t have been mad, and I wouldn’t have been hungry! LOL! But that would’ve been too much like right, and we just don’t like to do it the right way…


OK the other topic that everyone was tweeting about was when I said Kim stole the name Kash. Kim was tweeting stupid B.S. that of course people retweeted to me, so that I could see it. I think I explained this before, but I’ll briefly touch on it again. For many years I used to always keep a list of names for if I had any future kids. Kash was one of the names. When Todd and I started dating, just like many people do, we talked about if we ever had kids what we would name them, and Kash is the one name we agreed on. Although you see me saying we were going to name our kid Kash because we bought our house in cash, which really wasn’t the reason we picked the name. It was a joke. Not the part about buying the house in cash, that is true, just the part about why we chose that name. Anyway, after moving into the new house we would tell everyone that came to visit when I would give them the tour of the house that “This is going to be Kash’s room” when I would take them to this one particular bedroom upstairs.  I would say it EVERYTIME… People would make jokes about it. Kim came over to my house and I could’ve sworn that just like with everyone else I told her about Kash’s room. So when I had heard she had the baby and that she named him Kash, I felt like that was not cool for her to use the same name I had been going on and on about, and I wondered why would she take my idea. I was not the only one who felt that way. I got so many calls and texts from other people who know us both on the day she announced her child’s name. They also thought she took it from me and that it was not cool. It’s not that people can’t use the same names, I think it was more the principle of the whole thing that bothered me. My thoughts were that when I gave her the tour of my house, why didn’t she mention that she wanted to use that name for her son too if she already had that idea. Well, since then a mutual friend said that Kim had mentioned the name to her before, and that she really believes Kim didn’t get it from me. So I have to ask myself, did I not mention to Kim the whole “Kash’s room” idea when I gave her the tour of my house? Had I not told her about my list of names as I have told so many other friends? I guess it could be possible that I didn’t, but it would be hard to believe, because I could have sworn we said it to EVERYBODY that we gave the tour to, and it’s not like Kash is a common name. At least I didn’t think so. That would be weird to think that Kim and I think that much alike…

I’m over it now. It doesn’t even matter anymore. It’s her child’s name and that’s fine. I know people think it’s silly to come up with names for kids you don’t have yet, but I’m sure I’m not the only person who plans for the future with someone they love. Well, although the whole debate about the name is null and void to me (as well as pointless), I do have to bring up one thing said by Kim. Kim tweeted that she wants Andy to bring a lie detector test to the reunion so that we can see who is lying about Kash’s name. I don’t get the part about seeing who’s lying about the name, because clearly I didn’t get the name from Kim. The only question is whether she just so happened to think of the same name or if she got it from me. Which doesn’t even matter. BUT I think Kim has a great idea with this whole bringing a lie detector to the reunion! I would love to add more questions to the list for Kim to see if she would pass… I find it strange that someone who’s always been described as a big liar, even by her own parents, would suggest bringing a lie detector test to the reunion. Girl, you are setting yourself up for failure! Even though Kim and I are not on the best of terms, I wouldn’t even wish that on her. Can you imagine the can of worms that would open up if they bring a lie detector to the reunion? If all the alleged lies from Season 1 until now were able to be confirmed or disputed? Hmm… I bet she would lie her way out of taking the test if that happened! LOL!

Did you guys get to see the commercial for my new show The Kandi Factory? I’m so excited about it! It airs April 9th at 10pm. I hope that you tune in and please spread the word!

Also, my single Stay Prayed Up is available now. Here are the links:

iTunes:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/stay-prayed-up-single/id603720988

Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Stay-Prayed-Up/dp/B00BIXCSMQ/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1361498302&sr=8-2&keywords=kandi+stay+prayed

Much love,
Kandi

www.BedroomKandi.com
www.KandiOnline.com
www.TagsAtl.com

Follow me on Twitter @Kandi and on Instagram @KandiBurruss.

Claudia: I Was Sick of the Ladies' Drama

Claudia Jordan explains why she wanted to help mediate.

Bravotv.com: How did you feel about your relationship with Phaedra after the lunch?
Claudia Jordan: I felt that even though she wasn't quite ready to share too much personal information specifically about her break up, she did open up to me and showed some real emotion, and that was a breakthrough in itself. Phaedra always appears to be in control of her emotions, so I was quite surprised when she started to tear up. At that point in the conversation she was talking about failure and recalling an incident where she didn't pass an exam and was doubting herself. I know that wasn't relationship related, but the fact that she was willing and able to open up to a newbie about something that was painful to her -- to me was still progress. I appreciated that conversation, and I think both participants in a deep convo like that can't help but to walk away feeling moved and also just more aware of what may make the other person tick. It was a positive experience.


Bravotv.com: Why did you decide to try and help mediate the ladies' issues?
CJ: Because quite frankly I was sick of it. I think I was in a unique position, because I'm new to the group and any "beef" I've had with the ladies has been surface issues. Nothing earth shattering. I am not as emotionally attached as some of the others. Plus I am in a good place with the majority of the ladies, and I think I'm a pretty fair person, so I think it worked. I do think the silly issues that I have had with a couple of the ladies have mainly come as a result of my prior friendship with Kenya. And that's unfortunate. Especially in this group where former enemies are now close. I figured if some of the others can turn that around, then any problems that stemmed from my affiliation with Kenya should be able to be fixed. The older we get and the more time we spend on this earth, the more people we will have interactions with, and some of them won't be pleasant. To write someone off because they are friends with someone you didn't gel with is just silly. I arrived on the scene knowing the prior issues that Kenya had with a few of the ladies, and I was able to push past that. I even tried to reach out to one at work and at lunch knowing she had a physical altercation with Kenya. And of course I knew about the long standing issue between Kenya and Phaedra, but I think I more than stepped up to the plate and showed how open minded I could be by giving Phaedra the best room as well as meeting with her and having a genuine conversation with no ulterior motive. I was sincere. With that being said, I wouldn't expect anyone to do anything that I wasn't willing to do. So if I can do it -- and be open -- then why can't everyone else? I've seen a few girls apologize repeatedly for things they may or may have not been actually guilty of just for the benefit of the group, while others refuse. I know it's tough to do as long as you still hold a grudge, but what do grudges get us? They get us wrinkles, anxiety, and uncomfortable dinners. And who wants that? Now I am far from perfect, and I clearly still have some work to do my damn self. I know I definitely feel the need to prove my point and to show why I moved the way I moved. And that is something I am trying to work on. But right now I am happy to try to help the others in the group, and if I can assist in the smallest of ways, that's a success and I can walk away feeling good about that. Hey, baby steps are better than no steps at all!


Bravotv.com: Did you feel like the vibe changed for the better after everyone talked through their issues at dinner?
CJ: Ab-so-freaking-lutely! It was smooth sailing after that, and it felt like a great weight was lifted off of our shoulders. After the dinner I even got a visit in my villa from Kandi and Porsha and we sat around and talked. I thought, "Finally! A real moment of coolness!" My thing is this -- when new folks are coming together, there are going to be growing pains. You might do something I do not approve of and vice versa. We might have a big blow up and think that we hate each other for a moment. But more often than not, these are just surface issues. Nothing deep. Plus I think because we have this platform, sometimes folks put ten on twenty and do a little extra than they may do in their normal day to day to have their "moment" and show their ass. So I try to take that into consideration. It's just not normal to argue on this level all the time. But that dinner was a lot of things -- we had shade, frustration, glass breaking, arguments, interruptions, patience, understanding, and finally some hope at the end when Phaedra and Kenya agreed to have a private conversation to see if they could make some progress. I think some things are best to bring up in front of everyone and some conversations work better if it's just between the two ladies involved. I guess the trick here is learning when to do what so that no one's feelings are hurt and no one feels blindsided. Again, none of us are perfect, and there is no handbook to all of this. We are all a work in progress and learning each other as we go. But for now things are feeling pretty good and hopeful! Let's pray that these good vibes continue!

Thanks again to all the wonderful viewers who have been awesome! I was hosting an event in Dallas, Texas this past weekend at a place called Marquee, and the love I got was overwhelming. From the flight attendants, to fellow passengers on the plane, to all the folks that showed up to hang out and meet me. Nothing but wonderful vibes and love from supporters of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. I was overwhelmed! I appreciate you all accepting me and taking me in to the family! And I must give a shout out to the fabulous RuPaul and the beautiful Regina King who were both guests this past Sunday on Watch Watch Happens Live and both had such great things to say about me. I truly am humbled and am very flattered!


Please check me out on Twitter and Instagram @claudiajordan and my website www.TheRealClaudiaJordan.com.

Also to our fans in Florida -- I will be hosting an all-white party Friday April 3 in Orlando, Florida at Club EMBER. Flyer below. So put on your best all-white outfit and come join me! 

 

 

Thanks,
Claudia J xoxo

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