Cast Blog: #RHOA

The Kash Debate

Has Kenya Found Love?

Claudia: Kordell was Barely Flirting

Kenya on NeNe's "Embarrassing" Behavior

Claudia: "These Double Standards are Killing Me"

Kandi: "I'm Not Two-Faced"

Phaedra: I Appreciated Demetria's Apology

Are Demetria and Phaedra Cool?

NeNe on Her Apology

Cynthia: Claudia Can Read with the Best of Them

Claudia: NeNe's Behavior Needed to Be Checked

Kenya on "The Beasts"

Phaedra: Demetria Took Things Too Personally

GIF Recap: Lessons in Reading

Phaedra's Ignorant Comments

Claudia: I'm Not Surprised by NeNe's Ugly Demeanor

Kenya: NeNe Doesn't Want to Like Me

Cynthia: I'm Moving Forward in Grace and Love

Kandi: "I Wasn't Trying to Set Demetria Up"

Phaedra on Being Recognized by the Bar

NeNe: "I'm Not a Fake Friend"

Demetria Responds to the Rumors

Cynthia: Forgiveness is a Process

Phaedra: My Mother is My Rock

Kenya: "An Acknowledgement is Not an Apology"

Claudia: I Do Not Own a Flip Phone

Cynthia: It Was Awkward Seeing Phaedra Uncomfortable

Demetria: I Have No Beef with Kenya

NeNe Explains the Wig

Phaedra: I Was Hoping Apollo Wouldn't Create a Scene

Kenya's Not Interested in Roger Bobb

Claudia: "I'm the Samantha of the Group"

Kenya: Cynthia Commanded the Runway

Phaedra: You Don't Often Come Across Hair Burglary

Cynthia: "I Pray We Can Make Peace"

Claudia: I Could Relate to Cynthia's Insecurities

Cynthia's "Non-Conversation" with NeNe

NeNe: The Pit Bull Act is Not a Good Look

Kenya: If It Looks Like a Fraud...

Phaedra: "I Moved Past This Years Ago"

Claudia: I Am Not Asking for Sympathy

The Kash Debate

Kandi answers your questions about being late to NeNe's dinner and the conflict with Kim over the name Kash.

Well last night’s episode was another episode that had Twitter on fire! LOL! I had so many people asking me what’s up with me and NeNe. They were telling me how horrible we were for showing up late to NeNe’s event and so on and so on. It seemed like people were mad at me for ALL OF US being late.



OK let me just share my opinion about the situation. First off, yes, it’s wrong to be super late to a dinner. I know that. There is no excuse to be that late. I’m not saying it is cool for us to be that late. We all (except for Cynthia) typically have a problem with being on time, including NeNe. I can recall many times when NeNe has showed up super late to different things we were doing, so that’s why I was surprised that she was snapping so hard. When she said on the phone that she wanted us to turn around and not come, I was OK with that. I can’t remember whose bright idea it was to go over there anyway. We were rolling as a group, so if that’s what they wanted to do, then fine, but we all were tired and hungry (not just me, but I was the most vocal about it). We had a five hour flight that got us to LA smack in the middle of rush hour traffic. It took over two hours to get to the house NeNe rented for us. When we got to the house, there wasn’t anything to eat there. We still had to wait on Phaedra to get there before we left for NeNe’s house. NeNe waited with us a little while before she even went back home. She couldn’t have left before 8:30 for what was a 9:00 dinner, so she knew we would be late. Nonetheless there’s a major difference being an hour late and being three hours late.

I didn’t even change clothes, because I was ready to go. I have no idea what took so long, but it wasn’t me this time. I remember it took Phaedra a while to get there and that was the main reason for the wait, but other than that I can’t recall what took us so long to leave. By the time we did leave I was STARVING.  When I’m hungry I get moody, silly acting, and my patience is super short. When we got to her house and saw her waiting outside to go off on us, I was like really? Why are we standing here and begging this woman to let us in her house? This is stupid! Even though we were late, I did feel like she could’ve still let us come in. I would have let them in if it were me. When I was walking over and peeping in the window, I was being silly. My point was if I came all this way to see you, then I need to see something dammit! LOL!  But when I saw that some of the guests were still there, it pissed me off. At that point I felt like she was trying to show out on us in front of her LA friends. If it was over and everyone was gone, OK cool, but if people are still here, why can’t we come in? So I was done looking like a fool in her driveway, and I was ready to go find something to eat at that point. Looking back the best thing to do would have been to go straight to NeNe’s house after we got to LA and just let Phaedra meet us there. Then we wouldn’t have been late, NeNe wouldn’t have been mad, and I wouldn’t have been hungry! LOL! But that would’ve been too much like right, and we just don’t like to do it the right way…


OK the other topic that everyone was tweeting about was when I said Kim stole the name Kash. Kim was tweeting stupid B.S. that of course people retweeted to me, so that I could see it. I think I explained this before, but I’ll briefly touch on it again. For many years I used to always keep a list of names for if I had any future kids. Kash was one of the names. When Todd and I started dating, just like many people do, we talked about if we ever had kids what we would name them, and Kash is the one name we agreed on. Although you see me saying we were going to name our kid Kash because we bought our house in cash, which really wasn’t the reason we picked the name. It was a joke. Not the part about buying the house in cash, that is true, just the part about why we chose that name. Anyway, after moving into the new house we would tell everyone that came to visit when I would give them the tour of the house that “This is going to be Kash’s room” when I would take them to this one particular bedroom upstairs.  I would say it EVERYTIME… People would make jokes about it. Kim came over to my house and I could’ve sworn that just like with everyone else I told her about Kash’s room. So when I had heard she had the baby and that she named him Kash, I felt like that was not cool for her to use the same name I had been going on and on about, and I wondered why would she take my idea. I was not the only one who felt that way. I got so many calls and texts from other people who know us both on the day she announced her child’s name. They also thought she took it from me and that it was not cool. It’s not that people can’t use the same names, I think it was more the principle of the whole thing that bothered me. My thoughts were that when I gave her the tour of my house, why didn’t she mention that she wanted to use that name for her son too if she already had that idea. Well, since then a mutual friend said that Kim had mentioned the name to her before, and that she really believes Kim didn’t get it from me. So I have to ask myself, did I not mention to Kim the whole “Kash’s room” idea when I gave her the tour of my house? Had I not told her about my list of names as I have told so many other friends? I guess it could be possible that I didn’t, but it would be hard to believe, because I could have sworn we said it to EVERYBODY that we gave the tour to, and it’s not like Kash is a common name. At least I didn’t think so. That would be weird to think that Kim and I think that much alike…

I’m over it now. It doesn’t even matter anymore. It’s her child’s name and that’s fine. I know people think it’s silly to come up with names for kids you don’t have yet, but I’m sure I’m not the only person who plans for the future with someone they love. Well, although the whole debate about the name is null and void to me (as well as pointless), I do have to bring up one thing said by Kim. Kim tweeted that she wants Andy to bring a lie detector test to the reunion so that we can see who is lying about Kash’s name. I don’t get the part about seeing who’s lying about the name, because clearly I didn’t get the name from Kim. The only question is whether she just so happened to think of the same name or if she got it from me. Which doesn’t even matter. BUT I think Kim has a great idea with this whole bringing a lie detector to the reunion! I would love to add more questions to the list for Kim to see if she would pass… I find it strange that someone who’s always been described as a big liar, even by her own parents, would suggest bringing a lie detector test to the reunion. Girl, you are setting yourself up for failure! Even though Kim and I are not on the best of terms, I wouldn’t even wish that on her. Can you imagine the can of worms that would open up if they bring a lie detector to the reunion? If all the alleged lies from Season 1 until now were able to be confirmed or disputed? Hmm… I bet she would lie her way out of taking the test if that happened! LOL!

Did you guys get to see the commercial for my new show The Kandi Factory? I’m so excited about it! It airs April 9th at 10pm. I hope that you tune in and please spread the word!

Also, my single Stay Prayed Up is available now. Here are the links:

iTunes:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/stay-prayed-up-single/id603720988

Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Stay-Prayed-Up/dp/B00BIXCSMQ/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1361498302&sr=8-2&keywords=kandi+stay+prayed

Much love,
Kandi

www.BedroomKandi.com
www.KandiOnline.com
www.TagsAtl.com

Follow me on Twitter @Kandi and on Instagram @KandiBurruss.

Claudia: "These Double Standards are Killing Me"

Claudia Jordan shares her thoughts on NeNe Leakes' apology and the double standards within the group.

WHEW! What trip! First of all I'd like to thank Demetria for inviting us all down to Puerto Rico for her do-over. And honey, what a do-over it was! The rooms were cute and cozy, the weather was amazing, and the pina coladas were fantastic! And on top of all that I really got to know Demetria a little more, and I just adore her. And of course like always I had a great time with Kenya and Cynthia. Those two really know how to have fun, and I appreciate their laid back and easy going demeanor. Our time at the pool was fun -- especially watching Kenya attempt to speak both Italian and broken Spanish to our bartender in an attempt to wrangle up some local cuties!

Dinner…well the evening once again started out fun, fun, fun! I was with my girls Demetria, Kenya, and Cynthia, and it was all so effortless and easy breezy! We were making toasts in honor of our gracious host as well as to new friendships. The tone of the evening certainly changed when the rest of the ladies showed up. I don't think I saw any one of them besides Kandi acknowledge Demetria, our host. Girl, I need these folks to take an etiquette class or something around these parts! But I digress. Things got heated between Demetria and Ms. Parks, and it was all downhill from there. I honestly couldn't understand the treatment of Demetria from Phaedra. On a shady scale from 1 to 10, I give it an 8.

As for the little disagreement I was involved in, Iet's just say it was a fight of words with lots of bobbing and weaving that was capped off with a verbal scalping! Lots of low points and crass things said, and plenty of one sided yelling. I am proud to say that I maintained a calm and classy demeanor throughout and let my wit, not my volume, do my work against several malicious false statements made by the mother hen.

Kandi's party was fun as always and it was nice to see all the ladies get along and have fun -- something I think usually is missing when certain people are in the mix. But I will say on that night it was great hanging with all the ladies. I had a great time and was surprised at who excelled and who struggled with the Pass the Potato/dildo game!

The bus ride to Demetria's performance was interesting. First we got the news that one of the women in our group would be stepping in and taking over for Sherri Shephard in the Broadway play Cinderella! That was great news, because I heard that Sherri did her thing, so although those are some big shoes to fill, even getting a chance at that role is huge, and I acknowledge that. Kudos!!!

I guess I should address the argument with Linnethia (Is that how you spell it? One day I will get it right!). I think I showed maturity when I congratulated her on her newest gig, but I felt I'd take that time to also make the point that she is not the only one working. Often times that is her narrative: "I'm the only one that will be left standing. I'm the Queen! I'm the only original! I'm rich! They are not on my level!" I mean it's exhausting to constantly hear these things, but even more laughable that it's being said to a group of women -- the majority of this group has been working on their own long before the phenomenon of reality television. I know I'm dating myself, but I've been a member of the Screen Actors Guild since 1994. I just don't think people that are used to working feel the need to constantly tell everyone that they work. We're all adult women, aren't we supposed to be working? When one behaves like this, it makes it difficult to "give props," yet Cynthia and I both did regardless of the shade.

Some may think I'm a pit bull or that I was wrong for not accepting NeNe's weak apology. Well I don't know how these ladies do it, but where I'm from apologies for bad actions usually come with an explanation so there is an understanding as to why it happened in the first place. That was my entire point for pressing NeNe. I wanted to know why that was the go-to thing to attack me with -- my integrity as a woman. I've experienced lots of things in my life, I know a thing or two about sexual abuse, so for me to be called a "whore" and have someone talking about my private parts is for sure a trigger. I don't want to get into all the ugly details, but let's just say my life was affected by that word, and it is something that cuts me deep. It seems that has followed me throughout my life. Maybe because I am considered somewhat attractive, the go-to insults are "whore, ho, bitch, and slut." I remember not being able to have sex for years after what happened to me, and men getting frustrated with me and again using that word to hurt me when that was the furthest thing from the truth. I wish people would be careful with the words they chose to use, because you never know someone's back story. So I was demanding NeNe tell me why she was calling me a whore, and she refused to answer that question, so that was why it was so difficult for me to accept a simple, "Well, I'm sorry!"

Now is there a time or occasion when the use of that word is warranted? Absolutely! That should be reserved for women who exchange sexual favors for money or gifts, not because you are losing an argument. When you make these gross declarations on a huge platform, you give the green light for others to follow. I have had hundreds of people repeat this to me since NeNe screamed it at me, and it's not right. And I find it ironic that since then a very false list has been circulating the internet of all these alleged lovers that I'm being linked to, several of which are married to women I am cool with. The timing could not be any more convenient for some. This list is mostly false, not 100% but mostly! Once again, we must be careful with how we characterize one another, ladies. I know that I do not speak on something unless I am damn near 99% certain of it and pretty much know. I encourage others to follow suit.

As for the other lady I fussed with, well, it may have seemed unwarranted and I am sorry about that. I just wanted to make a point that the double standards in this group are crazy! I just don't how for some women it's, "Close your legs to married men," and then to others it's, "Do you girl, get your coins!" It gives me a headache trying to figure out the rules of engagement in this group! Ugh! Can I get a handbook of the rules? Because these double standards are killing me. I need for things to make sense.

I have to say I loved, loved, loved Demetria's performance! I knew she could sing, but I didn't know she could SANG! It almost brought me to tears seeing a beautiful and kind woman living her dream and doing it so damn well! Despite all the shade and negativity she had to deal with leading up to her show, she handled it like a true professional and pushed all that nonsense to the side and flourished. She for sure is an inspiration. Sometimes when I'm down I tend to curl up and hide, but to see Demetria fly high after all the nonsense was inspirational! I will continue to support this woman, and last I heard she was climbing up the iTunes charts and was at number 4! Take that, naysayers!

OK this was my most personal blog so far, and just a taste of things to come. I will continue to try to be an open book so you all can really get to know me. And in the process I hope some who share some of my struggles can feel better about their own and take comfort in knowing that you do not have to feel like you are alone and that you are damaged goods. There is life after tragedy and there are rainbows after the rain. Trust me, I know! I appreciate the love and support from those that have found something in me to relate to. I read all the comments and messages, and I just want to say the love has been overwhelming. Seriously guys and gals! Words cannot express how wonderful you guys have made me feel since joining the show. I love you all! XOXO

 
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