Cast Blog: #RHOA

Kenya's Negativity

Porsha doesn't understand why Kenya has such a bad attitude.

Hello to all of you who joined me last night via USTREAM and those of you at home who watched my show debut.
 
First, I have to say wow, what an experience the whole ordeal was for me. When I was asked to be a part of the show, my first response was to say no. It’s a challenge to be in an environment where people are so judgmental and every action (whether good, bad, or indifferent) is subject to criticism, mostly negative. After weighing the pros and cons, I began to feel good about having a platform that will allow me to let the passions of my heart help others and decided to give it a go.
 
I can’t even begin to express the excitement of hosting an event at my late grandfather's (Rev. Hosea Williams) home. I have had so many wonderful memories being in that home with my grandfather, whom I lovingly call Baboo. From the age of 5 until about 13 years old, my siblings and I would visit my Aunt Liz for cozy Sunday dinners.
 
During my teen years, my grandfather moved to the house directly behind the home featured on the show. My big brother Hosea, younger brother Brenton, and I would listen with amazement as he shared stories of the civil rights struggle. It was important for him to educate us about the struggles and sacrifices so we would know how much we should appreciate those who fought for many of the rights and luxuries we enjoy today.
 
My grandfather will be forever missed and loved. So for me to decide to have an event at the Hosea Williams House was a complete honor for me and a humbling experience. The focus of the event was to raise funds and collect book bags filled with school supplies for children whose parents were economically challenged. All of the ladies that I invited were held in high regard, but that soon changed… Let me explain.A Meeting with a Former Miss USA
 
I was so excited and had such high expectations for my lunch date with Ms. Kenya Moore. As a child I looked up to her when she won the title of Miss USA, chosen to represent black women all over the USA. Continuing with the same admiration I previously held for her, I asked her to join me and 30 women. She was joining an impressive guest list of other celebrated women, some of whom have their own respective charities as well as successful business owners.
 
From the first moment I sat down in front of Kenya I felt a huge rush of negative energy, and it actually stopped me in my tracks for a moment. She who was once a beautiful and admirable lady whom I was anxious to meet had become a cold, bitter shell of a woman. She was so cold to me from the jump! I didn't want to even ask her to join me after meeting her, but I know that I can come across as such a burst of energy. I kept thinking maybe she was having a bad day and the chip on her shoulder isn't about me. I gave her the benefit of the doubt.
 
I must admit I was shocked at how she took offense to me and my questions about love, marriage, and children. I was simply trying to engage her in conversation in order to get to know her better and break the ice. I mean, hello, if we are two adult women over 30 what would cause me to think a person would be insulted by my asking if she was married and what brought her to Atlanta? However, if you are a completely self-absorbed individual who thinks I was there to kiss your butt and court you to simply join me in supporting a cause, then yes, maybe you would take offense.

After I left from that awkward meal with the Official Ice Queen, I began to put the finishing touches on the event. Initially, my husband was asked not to join us, because it was an event for women of power. Later that night I was pleasantly surprised to see my husband standing there at the event. I completely adore him and I am so thankful that after all the work I had put into the event he decided to surprise me for my birthday and brought me a cake and a gift towards the end. I’m so thankful that he also donated money along with us to support Hosea Feed the Hungry and Homeless Back to School Jamboree.
 
OK let’s get back to what you guys saw. Now first of all, Kenya was two hours late and when she came in once again the bad energy that hovers around her entered as well. She came into the event as if we all were supposed to stand and applaud. Note: She was not the honored guest! *singing* “Have several get your life”.My Speech… Oops!

I decided to make a speech and thank all of the women in the room for supporting me and my family’s foundation. During the speech I was overcome with emotion and opened my eyes to discover Kenya texting and rolling her eyes. I thought to myself, it looks like this child just needs some attention…LOL! So I decided to recognize her only to make a fraudulent slip and say Miss America (falls off the tongue so nicely LOL). Anyway, all hell broke loose. She snaps her weave ponytail and corrects me, I then immediately apologize, only to be given a deadly look of despise. I’m thinking, girl, get over yourself! We are at a charity event for children, who don't even have food to eat or sufficient supplies to be successful at school. Why are you about to go H.A.M. over a title that you no longer even hold? Girl, stop!
 
I felt as if she had been waiting on the perfect moment to create a scene and show out. Well, I wasn’t having it! I wanted to stop any kind of washed up diva antics that she was about to display. So then she leaves and goes outside and tells her friend she is going to meet another guest…a male guest at that. I'm now feeling disrespected 10 times over. How dare you reluctantly come to this event knowing you could care less for any of the children it will support? And now you are outside causing a huge scene! I immediately felt as if I needed to squash the issue so I went to check on her to see if she was OK.
 
Even after my second apology, she was still mad. At that point, her presence was more a distraction and her negativity was putting a dark cloud over the event. I felt it best she leave. Thank you! She then tells me I’m just waiting on a friend, I’m coming back in. I then let her know she was no longer welcome. I could not believe I would have to resort to kicking out “Miss Whatever She Was a Hundred Years Ago.” I never thought that she would have been so classless as to bring drama to my grandfather’s home and take away the focus from the children.

I’m shocked that it never crossed her mind to decide to support me in my fight against poverty. Instead she judged me and wanted to ruin anything associated with me. If I were her, I would have seen a young woman trying to stand for something and would have stood with her. You would think that since Kenya was afforded the opportunity to win a title such as Miss USA by standing on the shoulders of my grandfather and so many others who fought and stood for the right for her to even have a platform for her accomplishments. I feel she should have tried to let some of the richness (not financial riches, but the richness in history) rub off on her. Why wouldn’t she choose to be a respectable, seasoned woman that I and other young girls could look up to? I still pray for her and hope she finds inner peace about what has happened to her in her past.
 
We have the strength to change the future by putting one foot in the right direction and not looking back. I am so thankful that most of you will really experience who I am and what I stand for. And if you don't, that’s OK, as long as you just take with you that you are not your circumstances. It’s what you do during and after your trials that builds character. Live each day knowing you are blessed and find a way to impart some of what you have been blessed with to others.
 
P.S. Sorry this was so long and detailed. I’m just very passionate about what my family has accomplished with Hosea Feed the Hungry and Homeless and I feel I would be remiss not to share with you all my true feelings. Next time, I promise I’ll be back to my funny, bubbly self. When you live in the world, sometimes you become of the world. Not me! I will continue to hold my head high and not let negative, bitter people get me down. Note to Kenya: Sorry you didn't get that to-go plate of food I heard you asked for, I got you next time girl.
 
Stay tuned! Love you all. I'll chat with you next week. Kisses!



Join Hosea Feed the Hungry and Homeless
4Hosea.Org
Give $10.00 and buy a homeless child a toy. Text HFTH to "20222"

Claudia: I Was Sick of the Ladies' Drama

Claudia Jordan explains why she wanted to help mediate.

Bravotv.com: How did you feel about your relationship with Phaedra after the lunch?
Claudia Jordan: I felt that even though she wasn't quite ready to share too much personal information specifically about her break up, she did open up to me and showed some real emotion, and that was a breakthrough in itself. Phaedra always appears to be in control of her emotions, so I was quite surprised when she started to tear up. At that point in the conversation she was talking about failure and recalling an incident where she didn't pass an exam and was doubting herself. I know that wasn't relationship related, but the fact that she was willing and able to open up to a newbie about something that was painful to her -- to me was still progress. I appreciated that conversation, and I think both participants in a deep convo like that can't help but to walk away feeling moved and also just more aware of what may make the other person tick. It was a positive experience.


Bravotv.com: Why did you decide to try and help mediate the ladies' issues?
CJ: Because quite frankly I was sick of it. I think I was in a unique position, because I'm new to the group and any "beef" I've had with the ladies has been surface issues. Nothing earth shattering. I am not as emotionally attached as some of the others. Plus I am in a good place with the majority of the ladies, and I think I'm a pretty fair person, so I think it worked. I do think the silly issues that I have had with a couple of the ladies have mainly come as a result of my prior friendship with Kenya. And that's unfortunate. Especially in this group where former enemies are now close. I figured if some of the others can turn that around, then any problems that stemmed from my affiliation with Kenya should be able to be fixed. The older we get and the more time we spend on this earth, the more people we will have interactions with, and some of them won't be pleasant. To write someone off because they are friends with someone you didn't gel with is just silly. I arrived on the scene knowing the prior issues that Kenya had with a few of the ladies, and I was able to push past that. I even tried to reach out to one at work and at lunch knowing she had a physical altercation with Kenya. And of course I knew about the long standing issue between Kenya and Phaedra, but I think I more than stepped up to the plate and showed how open minded I could be by giving Phaedra the best room as well as meeting with her and having a genuine conversation with no ulterior motive. I was sincere. With that being said, I wouldn't expect anyone to do anything that I wasn't willing to do. So if I can do it -- and be open -- then why can't everyone else? I've seen a few girls apologize repeatedly for things they may or may have not been actually guilty of just for the benefit of the group, while others refuse. I know it's tough to do as long as you still hold a grudge, but what do grudges get us? They get us wrinkles, anxiety, and uncomfortable dinners. And who wants that? Now I am far from perfect, and I clearly still have some work to do my damn self. I know I definitely feel the need to prove my point and to show why I moved the way I moved. And that is something I am trying to work on. But right now I am happy to try to help the others in the group, and if I can assist in the smallest of ways, that's a success and I can walk away feeling good about that. Hey, baby steps are better than no steps at all!


Bravotv.com: Did you feel like the vibe changed for the better after everyone talked through their issues at dinner?
CJ: Ab-so-freaking-lutely! It was smooth sailing after that, and it felt like a great weight was lifted off of our shoulders. After the dinner I even got a visit in my villa from Kandi and Porsha and we sat around and talked. I thought, "Finally! A real moment of coolness!" My thing is this -- when new folks are coming together, there are going to be growing pains. You might do something I do not approve of and vice versa. We might have a big blow up and think that we hate each other for a moment. But more often than not, these are just surface issues. Nothing deep. Plus I think because we have this platform, sometimes folks put ten on twenty and do a little extra than they may do in their normal day to day to have their "moment" and show their ass. So I try to take that into consideration. It's just not normal to argue on this level all the time. But that dinner was a lot of things -- we had shade, frustration, glass breaking, arguments, interruptions, patience, understanding, and finally some hope at the end when Phaedra and Kenya agreed to have a private conversation to see if they could make some progress. I think some things are best to bring up in front of everyone and some conversations work better if it's just between the two ladies involved. I guess the trick here is learning when to do what so that no one's feelings are hurt and no one feels blindsided. Again, none of us are perfect, and there is no handbook to all of this. We are all a work in progress and learning each other as we go. But for now things are feeling pretty good and hopeful! Let's pray that these good vibes continue!

Thanks again to all the wonderful viewers who have been awesome! I was hosting an event in Dallas, Texas this past weekend at a place called Marquee, and the love I got was overwhelming. From the flight attendants, to fellow passengers on the plane, to all the folks that showed up to hang out and meet me. Nothing but wonderful vibes and love from supporters of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. I was overwhelmed! I appreciate you all accepting me and taking me in to the family! And I must give a shout out to the fabulous RuPaul and the beautiful Regina King who were both guests this past Sunday on Watch Watch Happens Live and both had such great things to say about me. I truly am humbled and am very flattered!


Please check me out on Twitter and Instagram @claudiajordan and my website www.TheRealClaudiaJordan.com.

Also to our fans in Florida -- I will be hosting an all-white party Friday April 3 in Orlando, Florida at Club EMBER. Flyer below. So put on your best all-white outfit and come join me! 

 

 

Thanks,
Claudia J xoxo

Read more about: