Hey everyone! I haven't blogged in sooo long and I'm sorry. This season was extremely hard for me. I was having so much personal drama that sometimes I was just feeling overwhelmed, and I didn't feel like talking about anything having to do with the show. My mom and I were going through a lot during taping, but when every episode aired, it felt like we went through it all over again. There were times where we weren't speaking, and I was just stressed out about it. Between the drama with my mom and Carmon or my mom and Todd, things were just in a constant turmoil.
Whatever I'm dealing with personally I always use it creatively. That is how I express myself. That is how I deal and keep myself from going crazy. The musical obviously was inspired by what I was and am still dealing with to a certain extent with my mom. Some of the things that she has said I used for inspiration for the story and songs. For example whenever she brings back a rumor or something she has heard about Todd, she always says, "People in the streets say...". I'm always like, who are these "people in the streets?!" Well, I wrote a song called "People in the Streets" for the mom character to sing.
Another example is my mom has accused Carmon and Todd of hooking up behind my back, so the mom in the musical does a similar thing to my character in the musical. Another example is my mom constantly talks about Todd not being a "provider," so of course the mom does the same thing in the play. My mom always says, "I love you more than I love myself" whenever she talks about why she's acting the way she acts, so I wrote a song called "A Mother's Love" where the mom sings: "I love you more than I love myself. That's what a mother's love is."