Cast Blog: #RHOA

Joyce Should Trust Kandi

Kenya thinks Joyce needs to have more faith in Kandi and her decision to marry Todd.

SHOE FETISH

I recently served as maid of honor for one of my best friends. I consider myself as her family. When Mama Joyce told Carmon it was a family affair, I was offended for her. I have been in the company of Mama Joyce many times and she is a sweet, caring, warm person. Having said that, even when emotions are running high, it is never a reason to be taken out of character. I was disappointed to see her take off her shoes as if to prepare for battle or throw them at Kandi’s BFF from childhood, whom she considers a daughter herself. Mama Joyce must contain her inner angst and allow Kandi to live her life, trust that Kandi will protect herself, and understand that she instilled the values in Kandi that have made her the sharp, successful business woman she is today.

INVISIBLE

Ironically, I would rather have a mother that acts inappropriately to protect me than not have a mother at all. My Aunt Lori is my mother’s sister and has always been a mother figure to me. She is smart, driven, successful, and kind. Since birth, my mother made the decision at age 16 to pretend she never had me. She has never spoken to me. Even if present in the same room with other people and family, she pretends that I simply don’t exist. She pretends I’m invisible.

I fully understand that there has been a void in my life because of this, which relates to my romantic relationships. I have never had any issues with falling in love, dating, sustaining long-term relationships, or attracting great men in my life, who have loved me unconditionally. Although I have had now seven proposals of marriage, I have never accepted one.

As my Aunt pointed out, I choose “unavailable men.” I’ve never wanted a married man or one that is in a relationship. I acknowledge I have a pattern of falling for men who are emotionally unavailable, physically unavailable in terms of distance, or categorically unavailable with respect to time or where they are in life. For instance, some men know they are not ready for marriage. Perhaps my pattern is that I unconsciously seek rejection or failure with these men, which sadly mimics my mother’s relationship.Although I have suffered a great deal of pain from my mother, my understanding of my own pathology is a step toward healing. Everyone has a story. Everyone has suffered loss, pain, or rejection on some level. My story of my mother has been written and published for 42 years. My story of having a family of my own is still being written. I have had a series of unfortunate setbacks, but I have faith in knowing that God has a plan for me. My Aunt believes that if a baby is what I want now, then I should focus on that. For me, I will explore all my options as I have someone special in my life. I have learned my lesson about pressuring a man for marriage. With that said, I will continue to work on myself so that I can be the best woman, friend, companion, and mother to my future children… Godspeed.

Kenya

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Kenya: I Felt Vindicated Yet Again

Kenya Moore weighs in on the dramatic confrontation with Phaedra Parks.

MOVING ON
I’d moved on and forgave Phaedra for all of the lies she single handedly fabricated about me. When Cynthia told me of Apollo’s latest findings, I didn’t doubt it, as I have experienced what she is capable of first hand. My emotional reaction was based on anger not pain. I thought, "The nerve of her!" She went on a slut shaming, whore-calling campaign without any proof, and now that Apollo caught her with sticky fingers dipped in chocolate, I felt vindicated yet again. I don’t care about their relationship or how many men Phaedra chooses to sleep with, that is her cross to bear.


FOGO De CHILE PLEASE!
I arrived at dinner with an open mind and just tried to stay focused on my future and not my past with these women. I have been to Brazil many times and made friendly talk with the waiter and was accused of flirting. I’m not above being nice to a waiter. And even if I was flirting, which I wasn’t, there is nothing wrong with a good man making an honest living. I wasn’t raised to only give my attention to married man that can buy my affections.


When Cynthia reluctantly brought up the Apollo accusations, I kept quiet. To those who say I’m in Phaedra’s business or marriage, let’s get one thing straight -- Phaedra brought my name into the conversation by saying "the text messages with Kenya and that supposedly didn’t happen either," in effect still calling me a whore and a liar. Of course I had a right to respond in kind. Classic Phaedra, divert attention from the real issue and lie on someone else, namely me. She tried it!


YOU WANT THE TRUTH? YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!
Apollo and Phaedra are both liars. Facts are indisputable. However, we are not talking about a rumor but an accusation. Whether you choose to believe it or not, it comes down to the facts whereby Apollo presented proof. Yet, it’s OK to believe him when he lied about me. Remember the lie is a lie? But don’t believe him about Chocolate and the proof he presented. In fact, Phaedra to this day is still trying to get the public to believe there was an "affair." The hypocrisy and contradiction! LOL!


But the truth will always come to light. Phaedra claimed she wasn’t called a "head doctor" in high school, even though it was her new BFF who stated it. Oh, and didn’t Chuck also say Phaedra was a "jump off"? She also lied about the phone call with Cynthia until Cynthia presented hard evidence. And let’s not forget she even lied about her due date to everyone -- the timeline doesn’t lie. Phaedra has so many skeletons in her closet, and they are not from the dead people she embalms.


MY REAL OBSESSION
I’m obsessed with my life and all the amazing things that are happening. #ThatIsALL


Moore Hair Care May 1, 2015
Catch me on The Millionaire Matchmaker March 22 on Bravo.
Life Twirls On premieres April 2015.
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