Claudia: I Was Sick of the Ladies' Drama
Claudia Jordan explains why she wanted to help mediate.
Bravotv.com: How did you feel about your relationship with Phaedra after the lunch?
Claudia Jordan: I felt that even though she wasn't quite ready to share too much personal information specifically about her break up, she did open up to me and showed some real emotion, and that was a breakthrough in itself. Phaedra always appears to be in control of her emotions, so I was quite surprised when she started to tear up. At that point in the conversation she was talking about failure and recalling an incident where she didn't pass an exam and was doubting herself. I know that wasn't relationship related, but the fact that she was willing and able to open up to a newbie about something that was painful to her -- to me was still progress. I appreciated that conversation, and I think both participants in a deep convo like that can't help but to walk away feeling moved and also just more aware of what may make the other person tick. It was a positive experience.
Bravotv.com: Why did you decide to try and help mediate the ladies' issues?
CJ: Because quite frankly I was sick of it. I think I was in a unique position, because I'm new to the group and any "beef" I've had with the ladies has been surface issues. Nothing earth shattering. I am not as emotionally attached as some of the others. Plus I am in a good place with the majority of the ladies, and I think I'm a pretty fair person, so I think it worked. I do think the silly issues that I have had with a couple of the ladies have mainly come as a result of my prior friendship with Kenya. And that's unfortunate. Especially in this group where former enemies are now close. I figured if some of the others can turn that around, then any problems that stemmed from my affiliation with Kenya should be able to be fixed. The older we get and the more time we spend on this earth, the more people we will have interactions with, and some of them won't be pleasant. To write someone off because they are friends with someone you didn't gel with is just silly. I arrived on the scene knowing the prior issues that Kenya had with a few of the ladies, and I was able to push past that. I even tried to reach out to one at work and at lunch knowing she had a physical altercation with Kenya. And of course I knew about the long standing issue between Kenya and Phaedra, but I think I more than stepped up to the plate and showed how open minded I could be by giving Phaedra the best room as well as meeting with her and having a genuine conversation with no ulterior motive. I was sincere. With that being said, I wouldn't expect anyone to do anything that I wasn't willing to do. So if I can do it -- and be open -- then why can't everyone else? I've seen a few girls apologize repeatedly for things they may or may have not been actually guilty of just for the benefit of the group, while others refuse. I know it's tough to do as long as you still hold a grudge, but what do grudges get us? They get us wrinkles, anxiety, and uncomfortable dinners. And who wants that? Now I am far from perfect, and I clearly still have some work to do my damn self. I know I definitely feel the need to prove my point and to show why I moved the way I moved. And that is something I am trying to work on. But right now I am happy to try to help the others in the group, and if I can assist in the smallest of ways, that's a success and I can walk away feeling good about that. Hey, baby steps are better than no steps at all!
Bravotv.com: Did you feel like the vibe changed for the better after everyone talked through their issues at dinner?
CJ: Ab-so-freaking-lutely! It was smooth sailing after that, and it felt like a great weight was lifted off of our shoulders. After the dinner I even got a visit in my villa from Kandi and Porsha and we sat around and talked. I thought, "Finally! A real moment of coolness!" My thing is this -- when new folks are coming together, there are going to be growing pains. You might do something I do not approve of and vice versa. We might have a big blow up and think that we hate each other for a moment. But more often than not, these are just surface issues. Nothing deep. Plus I think because we have this platform, sometimes folks put ten on twenty and do a little extra than they may do in their normal day to day to have their "moment" and show their ass. So I try to take that into consideration. It's just not normal to argue on this level all the time. But that dinner was a lot of things -- we had shade, frustration, glass breaking, arguments, interruptions, patience, understanding, and finally some hope at the end when Phaedra and Kenya agreed to have a private conversation to see if they could make some progress. I think some things are best to bring up in front of everyone and some conversations work better if it's just between the two ladies involved. I guess the trick here is learning when to do what so that no one's feelings are hurt and no one feels blindsided. Again, none of us are perfect, and there is no handbook to all of this. We are all a work in progress and learning each other as we go. But for now things are feeling pretty good and hopeful! Let's pray that these good vibes continue!
Thanks again to all the wonderful viewers who have been awesome! I was hosting an event in Dallas, Texas this past weekend at a place called Marquee, and the love I got was overwhelming. From the flight attendants, to fellow passengers on the plane, to all the folks that showed up to hang out and meet me. Nothing but wonderful vibes and love from supporters of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. I was overwhelmed! I appreciate you all accepting me and taking me in to the family! And I must give a shout out to the fabulous RuPaul and the beautiful Regina King who were both guests this past Sunday on Watch Watch Happens Live and both had such great things to say about me. I truly am humbled and am very flattered!
Please check me out on Twitter and Instagram @claudiajordan and my website www.TheRealClaudiaJordan.com.
Also to our fans in Florida -- I will be hosting an all-white party Friday April 3 in Orlando, Florida at Club EMBER. Flyer below. So put on your best all-white outfit and come join me!
Claudia J xoxo