Every married couple can recall an evening when one person is really not in the mood to go out and the other is…this was one of those nights.
As Mauricio's birthday approached, Russell was dealing with a heavy load at the office and we had been managing some emotional challenges at home with our extended family. Russell had to admit a close family member to the Malibu Beach Rehabilitation Center that week after an emotional intervention.
We were both extremely stressed, and feeling very different about how we each wanted to handle it. I thought we could spend the evening with our friends and forget about all the stress, while he was of the mindset to get some rest, try to relax, and have a little downtime. Both methods were good in theory but not necessarily on the night of our friend's birthday party with TV cameras rolling.
Russell was a good sport to accompany me to the party, and he did his best to have a nice time. He was tired, and preoccupied with his commitments, and although I wanted him to have fun, he just wasn't feeling it and I get that.
Russell has learned first-hand that a group of girls together with a DJ and a dance floor can turn into a marathon evening and he could tell we were headed down that path. My girlfriends and I can turn a simple dinner out into a five-hour chat session and he knows it. When Russell went home, he wasn't angry and I wasn't either. We weren't arguing. He was just ready to go home and it was late. I should have just gone home with him because after he left, I wasn't in the mood to have fun without him.
During the time frame the episode was filmed, we were dealing with quite a number of external challenges, and we were both feeling the pressure. We weren't communicating our feelings to one another, and the result wasn't enjoyable for either of us. Fortunately, our family member is now doing well.
I think we are all a bit different in the way we manage stress and learning to appreciate and respect each other's method is important. I hold in my emotions and feelings far too often whereas my husband is more straightforward about how he is feeling in any moment. Watching myself throughout the season, I have come to realize how I need to speak my mind when it comes to all my personal relationships. In an attempt to avoid conflict, I have a tendency to hold back my frustrations and allow them to build up internally, which doesn't allow others the opportunity to understand my point of view and doesn't make me feel good either. I am working on speaking my mind and although I have a long way to go, I feel better when I speak up and I know Russell appreciates knowing how I am feeling in the moment. Relationships are a work in progress and often, the challenging times teach us the most valuable lessons and provide us the best opportunity for growth.
Kyle threw a fabulous party for Mauricio. From the white tents to the food to the dance music, the party was a success. Mauricio had a great time celebrating his 40th birthday and the housewives and husbands all looked stunning in white.
Thank you for watching.
Until next week…
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