Cast Blog: #RHOBH

To Be Honest

Camille explains her frustrations leading up -- and during -- Lisa's tea and discusses what she regrets about that day.

Since it was Taylor’s luncheon, it was her prerogative to invite whomever she wanted. Actually the Housewives have been together at almost every event this year. I invited all the girls to my mother's benefit for the John Wayne Cancer Institute. We usually all go as a group. I wasn't surprised that Taylor decided not to invite Lisa. Taylor had been talking about Lisa's attitude towards her. I didn't know what to expect going into the tea party, however I was pretty much pre-occupied. That week was very difficult for me because my ex-husband filed for full custody and my mind was filled with concern for my children.

For me personally it was a very emotional day so I almost didn't make the tea party. It was a tough decision for me to even drive all the way to Lisa's house. I didn't want to go if there was going to be any drama. I didn't want to be involved in any because I was going through so much of my own. But there you go, I found myself smack in the middle. It wasn't by choice.

So I already began my day feeling vulnerable. I empathized with Taylor as she explained her feelings about Lisa. Obviously she was in a lot of pain. She also discussed her situation with Russell with all the women. It was the elephant in the room. We were all trying to help our friend. Since I'm not a therapist, I'm not qualified to make any assessment of her personal life. The only thing I can offer is advice. Lisa and I and the girls had offered our help. It was a very difficult place to be in.

Kyle spoke about being put in the middle which is exactly how I felt. I was blindsided by Taylor because she brought me into an argument that wasn't mine. That was her fight with Lisa and they needed to work it out themselves. It was very unfair to include me and the other girls. When I viewed the episode and saw Taylor tell Paul that all the girls agreed to back Taylor I was shocked. Taylor never asked me to support her against Lisa. We never had that conversation. I wouldn't have agreed to it -- because I had no problem with Lisa. Lisa has been there for me. Up to the tea party, Lisa was phoning at least twice a week, checking up on me, and being very supportive knowing what I was going through with my ex.

So, as you probably noticed I was getting more and more agitated with Taylor. I had all these pent up emotions and thoughts going through my mind. I felt bad for Taylor because obviously she was upset and was going through a lot. But why did she want the rest of the girls to fight her battle with Lisa? At this point in my life, I didn't want to be involved in any of that drama. I've been trying to avoid all drama and be as fair and honest as I possibly could. I'm still working on myself.

The argument should have been just between Lisa and Taylor. If Taylor had any problems with Lisa, I think she should have pulled Lisa aside or took her for tea alone and discussed their issues. It shouldn't have been at Lisa's house during a tea party.

Lisa wanted us to defend Lisa. Taylor asked Kyle to back her. I thought, "Wow, why must we choose sides when this is not our argument?" I was an unwilling participant unfortunately. Taylor should not have put us in that position. And to say that we were all talking behind Lisa's back was, I thought, a bit catty. Obviously she was just looking for support.

The conversation turned to their relationship when Taylor left. We had talked about Russell's email earlier. What was the more powerful issue? How Taylor felt about Lisa or what was going on in Taylor's personal life? We collectively as a group were concerned for Taylor. We all discussed how to help her. We truly care about our friend. We love Taylor and wanted to do what’s best for her and her daughter and help her find the strength to move forward with her life and hopefully choose the right course of action.

Some of Taylor's stories were inconsistent which led to our confusion. It was a very touchy and difficult subject and so sad and unfortunate. All we really wanted was the best for her and to help without crossing the line.

Accusations were flying around the room. I was frustrated because Taylor basically kept accusing us of being liars and talking behind Lisa's back. When she said nobody is being honest it struck a nerve with me. I thought, "OK, you might not think everyone is being honest but who is really being honest? You're not being honest with yourself. How do we help you because I know we all tried?" Over the last year and a half we have protected her and helped her. My frustration stemmed from her blaming others when she needed to look inside her own relationship and to also realize that we were there for her. So what I said came out of that frustration.

Do I regret saying it -- of course! If only I could have broached the subject better, I would have. At the time emotions were running high. Not just with me, but Lisa chimed in too. We were so frustrated. I was truly concerned for Taylor and that's the hard part. I wanted to be there for her. I did offer that she and Kennedy could move into my home. It was very difficult. All I wanted was to help my friend.

At that time, as I stated, we didn't know the extent of what was going on. Taylor was sending us mixed messages. Now we understand, but back then none of the girls sitting in the room fully understood the situation. As I said, I liked Taylor but after my divorce we didn't hang out that often. I considered her a friend but I didn't know all that was happening in her life. I wasn't in her close circle. Also many issues in my own life kept me focused on what I had to do for myself and for my children. It’s been very hard but we are getting there.

I regret now what I said during this episode. And I apologized. I felt absolutely terrible. All I wanted to do was help my friend. It was an especially difficult episode for me to watch. I'd just rather see us celebrate one another instead of fighting.

Lisa R.: I Am Done With Kim Richards

Lisa Rinna discusses her confrontation with Kim and dispenses some advice from her experiences this season.

We did it. We managed to get through Season 5 of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills without anyone going to prison! It got close at times, but thankfully, we did it. I went into this promising myself I would tell the truth, own my sh--, and always, ALWAYS come from a place of authenticity. Much like everyone else, I am human, and I make mistakes. Sometimes, I act on emotion before really allowing myself time to process, and that can lead me to say or do things that I’m not always proud of. But I make sure to own what I say and do, learn from the mistake, and hopefully grow into a better person because of it.

So, we start off with an emotional glimpse into my family life. It’s time to take down the beloved swingset we have loved and heavily used for nearly 13 years. There were so many wonderful memories attached to that swingset that we will cherish forever and how what a poignant representation of the end of our girls’ childhood as we know it. I wish we could have given it to another family to use and love as much as we did, but unfortunately it was made of wood and had become a hazard by this point. It was just too dangerous to pass along to another family, or else that’s exactly what we would have done. Watching my family during this transitional phase only reiterates just how important each of them is to me. I am fiercely protective of my husband and girls and will not tolerate anyone trying to falsely tarnish the love we all have for one another. The fact that this was even attempted that first night in Amsterdam was both an injustice and violation to my family and me. As a matter of fact, it’s such an injustice, that as we all saw, my inner Dalai Lama moved aside to let my inner gangster take over!

“Don’t let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.” -Dalai Lama

On to Adrienne’s party…I feel like I need to remind you that I was done, done, DONE with Kim Richards at this point. I went to this party with zero intentions of talking TO Kim, ABOUT Kim, and definitely nothing around Kim’s forbidden topic of sobriety. I have been scolded, yelled at, and thrown really f---ing hard into the lion’s den about it, so for my own sanity and peace of mind I. Had. To. Be. Done.

Rather quickly, it became quite evident that Kim was out to hurt Kyle.

Lisa Rinna

Now keep this in mind as I see Kim Richards walking toward me with a certain look of misguided determination in her eyes. When she sits down and asks me to talk about her sobriety, I honestly think I died a little inside. Was this for real? Was I being set up? What kind of warped reality did I find myself in at that moment when Kim was in front of me demanding I talk about "the situation" yet again?! Oh yeah, no way was I going to become a pawn in her weird little mind game. Rather quickly, it became quite evident that Kim was out to hurt Kyle. Kim was making it very clear that she chose not to believe what Kyle had told her, and she was trying to drag me in to help take down her sister. Let’s be real here for just a moment: We all know Kim doesn’t like, trust, or want to be around me at all, so why does she need my confirmation or validation of the conversation? Kim was going to hear exactly what she wanted to hear, regardless of anything I said, because that’s exactly what she does with everything anyway.

Nope. Not gonna play into Kim’s games for a second. I needed to stay honest to myself by not discussing Kim’s sobriety, and unfortunately that resulted in agitating and pissing everyone else off. Listen, I completely understood that both Kyle and Eileen had their opinions and strong need for me to justify Kim’s questions, but the “she said this and she said that” back and forth was just too much. Like I mentioned in last week’s blog, I did what Brandi asked by going to Kyle with this information, and it was now up to the Richards sisters to figure out.

Until I felt an overwhelming feeling that I wasn’t taking Kyle and Eileen’s side. I wanted to support them, so I confirmed the conversation only because Kyle needed me to. Not because Kim wanted me to. Big difference. So, I put aside my own opinion and point of view to support Kyle, since she felt so strongly about it. Walking over to Kim, only to have her shush me and snap at me and speak to me as if I were a child, was only allowing for more red flags to fly. As you saw, I took it in stride and temporarily buried it, but I really don’t do well with people talking to me in such a disrespectful way.

The two different times I spoke to Kim about it that evening, once with Brandi and once without, I felt the need to remind everyone around me that the conversations we’ve all had about Kim were always from a good place, a place of concern and worry, much like what Brandi and Kim apparently only reserve for their own friendship. I never had any intentions of making Brandi look bad during our lunch conversation, because I really felt she was speaking from the heart about her friend, Kim. It’s just a shame that she didn’t feel the same about my role in the conversation, and, yet again, she denies what was actually said. But I guess you live and you learn, and you slowly start to identify a person’s true colors, which is all just a part of this process.

It’s important to mention that I was also concerned for Brandi and her father. I had reached out to her about her father at that time, because I know how hard it is to have a parent with ailing health, and I was sympathetic to the obvious pain she was in. Though much like I remind my daughters as they navigate their young social lives, it’s important to treat others as you would like to be treated. Speak to others as you would like to be spoken to, and never allow your pain and unhappiness to be an avenue to lash out and hurt others.

I am still left bewildered and baffled with absolutely no closure from that party. I was just kind of left sitting there at the party dumbfounded by the turn of events and also by the way I was treated by Kim Richards. It’s so not OK to speak to people the way she does. That said, I do think Monty is a very sweet man, and I absolutely wish him the best.

So, off we go into a three-part reunion beginning next week. You’ve seen the previews by now, and it’s every bit as crazy as you’re thinking it will be. Lots of tears and screaming and F-bombs, and that’s just from Andy! Just kidding. But seriously, it was a nightmare of epic proportions, like a roller coaster you were trapped on for 10 hours. I’ve never experienced anything like it...

Thank you for reading my blog this season and really making me feel welcomed to the show. I had no idea that I would be embraced by such a great community of fans, so for that, I am forever grateful! Keep tweeting me so I don’t miss you all too much!

“Say how you feel, find your passion, love with every ounce of your bones, stand up for things that matter, don’t settle, don’t apologize for who you are... Be f---ing brave”

Until next time…

XO,

LR

Read more about: