Well, the season is almost over. It has been a very difficult and emotional one. We have also laughed and had good times, but a lot of that has been over-shadowed.
In Season 1, most of you didn't know about my sister's issues. There were many times I was angry with Kim but didn't want to say why. I didn't want to expose my sister and never intended to that night in the limo in the finale. There were a lot of things that were said and done that the cameras didn't catch, not to mention years of built up frustration and anger. I wanted to explain but it wasn't just MY story to tell, and Kim wasn't ready to address it with herself, let alone with millions of viewers. Anyone, who has a family member with an addiction knows how painful it can be for the family. Often, that pain turns to anger. I was angry. I didn't get that Kim has a disease. People would tell me that and it didn't make sense to me. I felt she had a choice. Now, I feel much different.
In watching this week’s episode, I am overwhelmed with sadness. To be honest, my relationship with Kim has been strained for so long because of all of this and I wasn't always privy to what was going on in her life, which is why I always wanted her to move closer to my sister Kathy and me. Not to "babysit" Kim, but so she wouldn't remove herself from society, as she tends to do, and fall into a deeper tunnel. Many of you have tweeted me or commented on my blogs that I should just walk away and leave her be and live my own life. I know that sounds easy, but I love my sister and her children and was scared what would happen if I did that. I couldn't give up on her.