Cast Blog: #RHOBH

Moves Like Grammer

Episode 15: Bravotv.com’s Associate Editor slips on her fingerless gloves and gets to knitting in honor of this week's episode.

Camille. Grammer. Dancing.

Honestly, I’m almost miffed that it took us 15 episodes to get to this -- this moment where we see Camille letting loose in "da club." Since she first shook her way into our hearts in Season 1 (and then in her more amazing Bat Mitzvah video showcased on WWHL), I've found myself enamored with the Donatacci dance. And finally, this season took mercy on us and provided her signature writhing.

But of course, Camille wasn't the only one shaking it this week. Brandi brought her boot to the dance floor, and the men of Chippendales did what they do best -- terrify and excite all at the same time. Plus there were plenty of other gems in this episode (i.e. people breaking expensive things! Dogs stuck in pajamas!). What happens in Vegas is recapped here. . .

Delegaters, Mount Up
Paul and Adrienne head off to appear on The Doctors to discuss their busy, yet fulfilling lifestyles.  But Paul hasn't eaten -- because, as Adrienne explained via delegation, it's Bernie's job to feed him. I'm not sure where Bernie was but by the time Paul got to the set, I think he could have eaten one of the smaller doctors. The man was famished. He needed a snack, and really who amongst us doesn't? (Editor's note: feel free to take this opportunity to go fix a snack. Ill wait.) I appreciate a man with an appetite, particularly one who doesn’t deny himself the finer things in life – like cupcakes and chocolate-covered treats -- while waiting to appear on a show about healthy lifestyles. Dr. Paul Nassif, every day you wiggle your way more and more into my heart.

Say Yes to the Dress (All of Them)
Meanwhile, Lisa and Pandora go off to try on wedding dresses (the wedding is really happening you guys!) and Giggy gets himself into a little bit of trouble.

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I hate to take joy from the struggles of others (schadenfreude) but that was the most adorable entrapment I’ve ever seen. Anyway, Pandora tries on a plethora of dresses, and I downright got almost misty. Weddings! All of the dresses were so flouncy and romantic, and this is before Pandora got to add her additional flowers. This wedding is really going to bring it – even if Lisa refuses to wear a big pink ball gown.

People Dropping Things
Again schadenfreude, but people dropping expensive things is always good for a laugh. So when a large, and gorgeous chandelier was lost in the hand-off between Faye, Kyle, and a poor shopkeeper, I could barely contain myself.

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Frankly if Giggy had been doing his "I'm stuck in my pajamas breakdance" at the same time, you probably would have needed to get me an oxygen mask. It was just too much.

Even with the broken baubles, Kyle managed to get things in order for her book cover photo shoot. Following in the footsteps of Sonja Morgan, she climbs right up on top of her dining table to take some photos. Unfortunately, Kim isn’t there to help her hurdle over the dining room chairs. Roxy does however get a guest spot, eating some of her own cheese, as does Portia, wearing a crown. Why is this episode trying to destroy me with cuteness? Weddings, dog pajamas, babies in crowns. . . and, of course, "chipmunks."

Vegas Baby
Over a heartfelt lunch with Lisa, Taylor explains the beach blanket bingo that was Brandi's party. But remedy awaits, as Lisa's bringing her along to Vegas for the big bachelorette party as part of Taylor's birthday.

Meanwhile Adrienne makes it to Vegas -- just in time to stop her brother from holding hands with a Playboy bunny. Soon after Dana, Brandi, Camille, and Dedra arrive at the Palms -- and start bowling. Yes, no big deal, the suite also has a bowling alley. So Camille bowls in heels and Brandi bowls in her boot, like that’s not strange at all. They do surprisingly well, particularly because of Dana's extremely encouraging words ("You're so thin and hot."). Also during this endeavor Dana is wearing a diamond lollipop holder valued at $1 million dollars. The last time I went bowling, we drank a pitcher of Bud heavy and, as a group, were all wearing the same shoes. I am never hanging out with my friends again.

Meanwhile, the Pandora party arrives at the Chippendales show. . .In a rare case of things exceeding your expectations this scene was even better than I could have ever imagined. Lisa Vanderpump discussed "cock socks" and how long it would take to knit something like that. And then, once the show itself commenced, the gyrating -- oh dear lord -- so much gyrating on couches. If you can bear it, hang tight to see Lisa, Pandora, and Taylor show the men how it is done.

I think Taylor said it best when she described her reaction as half-terrified and half thrilled.

Also warranting that sort of a response was the other ladies getting their groove on at Planet Hollywood. And I mean groove on, turned-to-11 on. Exhibit A:

There was a lot of fingerless glove-touching going on. I think we can firmly say that Camille is on Team Brandi.

Back in Beverly Hills, Kyle ran into Kim, only to find her sister is not exactly in the best place with Ken and the kids, explaining her absence from Vegas. Here's hoping her kids come around.

Next week, more parties and more drama. But for now let's keep focusing on the dance. Which dance moves did you prefer? Chippendales or Camille's? Leave your vote in the comments.

Brandi: You Can't Confirm What Didn't Happen

Brandi questions some of the ladies' motives, plus gives an interesting update on her relationship with LeAnn. 

Hey, My Bravoistas!

I’m in my American Airlines' seat 36 hours later, flying back home from NYC, thankful to be on a safe path home. My prayers go out to the families and loved ones of the downed German airliner in the French Alps this morning. I cannot imagine the pain being experienced by these families at this moment, which shockingly has led me to add a new person into my flight prayer today...my children’s stepmom. Don’t get me wrong--not everything is yet copasetic, but my children love her, so she is now in the “flight prayer,” differences aside. Now on a happier RHOBH note, last night’s WWHL with Andy was sooooo fun! No drama for once!

NEWS FLASH! Please watch for my new Sonoma County Chardonnay “Unfiltered Blonde,” to launch in April!

As I look over this past season, all I can say is it’s been an odd one. There were so many fun moments that got lost in the drama and so many weeks of fun you never saw at all. I wish you had, but I'm not in control of everything we get to see. I’d like to remember having fun with Kim “stalking” my now boyfriend J.R. That was such a crazy fun girls' night, Lisa R. being chased by killer bees, Yolanda and her Facetime confusion and meeting her family for the second time this--time in Holland, the Foster Foundation Extravaganza, “singing” at Lisa V.’s birthday party, and Kyle pretending to be a caring sister and owning yachts and planes…haha.
Ok, I’ll behave.

Here we are at the last episode of the season, yet, it seems most are still stuck in the beginning. I wish we weren’t, and I would dearly like to leave “Poker Night” behind. However, one person continues to make it the focal point of every interaction from when it happened and far into the three-part reunion.

This episode opens with Rinna tearing down a swing set, but her home interviews are still about what she perceives as Kim’s issues to be, not the actual touching moment of what the swing set tear-down symbolizes or her own family (I can't wait for her daughters to write their Brooke Shields-style memoir when they are age appropriate). LR says she feels sorry for Kim and cares about Kim and wishes Kim well. The truth is a lot less pretty. Some people have been attacking Kim’s sobriety online this week, but we won’t name names. BTW, Kim is sober and not online. She is busy caring for serious ill family members and driving back and forth to doctors and hospitals and being strong for her family.

Next we see Nicky Hilton’s book signing--sister Paris and mom Kathy Hilton are there. Looks like a great party and congrats to Nicky on her style book. Camille looks gorgeous as usual. Kyle angrily flips her hair, because Kim was wearing a shirt that she carries at “her” shop, but didn’t buy it there...whatever. Then Kyle whispers about her sister Kim to Lisa V. and Camille.
Kyle then tells them she is confused and impatient that Kim hasn’t confronted me over her third-hand Lisa R. gossip. She states Kim WILL be hurt and broken hearted over what “I” said… Kyle seems way too overy excited about that happening, which I find kind creepy. Why would anyone WANT their sister to be hurt or in pain?!

The preparations for Adrienne’s party are in full swing next. Lisa V. is fretting it, Kim is casually discussing the intervention GOSSIP with her makeup artist before the party, I’m getting ready and waiting for my friends and my date.

Adrienne’s party is the big finale of our journey this year. Everyone is there, and Adrienne always excels at events. So here we go. First off, my mind was not on the party at all. My father was recently hospitalized, and I didn’t leave his side for two weeks. It was very serious, but I had to return home to my boys. He was still not conscious, but I needed to get home to run my household--a party was the last place I wanted to be, but I had promised. That’s why I decided to bring the few people that I felt I could depend on in that moment. My friends and J.R. have been there for me during my father’s health scare and over more then a month of hospitalization--that was and is what remains what’s important to me.

The party seems like it was fun for a lot of people who weren’t involved in Kyle and Lisa. R.’s drama. I wish I were one of them, but in a way I was. As much as Kyle relished telling Kim the hurtful gossip she heard from LR, what she wanted to happen didn’t happen. There was no argument between Kim and I. We were happy to see each other. We spoke easily. I was busy worrying about my Dad; she was busy with her family.

What we saw on the finale was an efficient Kim quietly confronting Lisa R., then leaving Lisa R.'s table somewhat amused. Lisa R. couldn’t confirm the veracity of her gossip, because I DIDN’T SAY IT. Thanks again to Bravo for showing the truth in a flashback last week.

So, Kim knew who was who and what was what. The entertainment of the night was provided by Lisa R. going radio silent while Kyle begged for corroboration on her dramatic intervention gossip. Watching Yolanda, Eileen, and Lisa V. urge Lisa R. to support Kyle and verify her hurtful gossip was almost amusing. You can't confirm what didn't happen, can you?

In the end, I left the party early. Why? Not because of a past friendship with Lisa V. It's not her that made me cry--I was crying for my father, my dad! I was in no place to be at a superficial party, discussing a superficial incident with a person who was clearly not a friend, not that night. I said I would show up, and I did. After that, I wanted to be with my real close friends and family. Since this party my dad came out of the ICU and after 2 entire months and after a long stressful time I want to thank Dr. Allen Morris and all the doctors and nurses at Mercy General Hospital of Sacramento for saving my dad's life yet agin for the second time in 15 years. He is doing much better and continuing his hope of a full recovery. I am so thankful to all the people who were there for me and continue to be here for my family and I.

THAT is what life’s about, being with the people who truly love and care about you and the feelings are reciprocated.

As you hear, at the end of the finale, I am wistful, yet, wiser, and I think in a stronger place. I love and loved being there for Kim and being Kim’s friend, and I love that she was, is, and has been here for me. Even more so, I'm grateful and blessed to have Yolanda in my life; she is no bullsh--. Even when suffering herself, she is still so selfless. Yo is very special to me, I love her, she gets me, we have fun together, and I value every moment we spend together. I always will. As for the rest, I hope to share laughs and fun again, maybe tears, but hopefully only joy.

Peace Out. (deuces MFs--JK)

XOXO,

B

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