Cast Blog: #RHOBH

No More Peace

Ep 10: Bravotv.com's Editor doesn't hold a grudge against Mauricio, Mohammed, or the mannequins.

Well Beverly Hills fans. In case I've offended you, I've gone ahead and gotten a nice bottle of gin. You don't want it. Well, call me Mauricio then. Just kidding. Let's try and recap shall we.

The Call
We open back at the restaurant with Mauricio continuing to maintain that the entire debacle could be stopped with a well-placed phone call. As Brandi and Mauricio get increasingly heated, Kyle steps in and tells Mauricio to stop. And then everyone else jumps in. . .

Ken jumps in to tell Mauricio he never listens and to defend Brandi. Taylor jumps in to say she's been through much more than everyone else involved. Yolanda jumps in to say she’s talking nonsense.

This fight is like some sort of tumbleweed that just collects everyone as it rolls along. The string ball just gets bigger and bigger. If they sit there long enough the waiters are going to start giving their legal opinions on the matter.

After a semi-calming moment in the bathroom and an amazing moment where Kim and Mauricio actually agree, people manage to finally close up shop. Brandi and Mauricio even have a moment where they almost make up, until Ken calls Mauricio a typical man. Ken hates to go against his buddy, but the thinks Mauricio was out of line. And suddenly the drama knows no gender boundaries. To the Polo Lounge for restorative cocktails everyone!Later, the subject of all that hoopla reappears: Adrienne and Paul drop by the Richards-Umanksy abode for a light meal. The gang discusses the big fight for the first time, and Kyle feels like the lady in the middle as she's still friendly with Brandi. Hopefully everyone can get this sorted before the next real estate open house or Moroccan themed dinner they attend. It'd be terrible to make this a trend. 

Yo: The Domestic Diva
Next we see Yolanda in her natural element -– making someone's home as fabulous as her own. Her ex Mohammed has employed her to decorate one of his immaculately designed homes. And so Yolanda teaches several people English and brings along her best lemons to make sure all is well. And Mohammed loves it.

And how couldn't he? The house is INSANE. Seriously, why does Mohammed only make the most ridiculous, lady-olive filled homes on Earth? Who cares if he's a bit of a task master about slouching. I'd surely allow him to fuss at me about my posture if I could be his child and live in his home.

The Psychic Friends Network
Kim Richards sees dead people, or at least she thinks she does. And thus she's invited her trusty psychic Rebecca to check and see if she's feeling things properly. And turns out her spidey senses are correct. Rebecca believes Kim's grandkids (and someone who isn't her mom) are always watching over her.

Frankly, with things going with the ladies as they are at the moment, the more people looking after Kim the better. Besides actual spirits hanging out, Kim has also seen a heart-bedecked vortex. Yes what you or I would call a fireplace is actually a portal into another dimension. And the door is open, nothing she can do about that now.

Mannequin
Let's just talk for a second about the array of plastic people in the world. Did you know that such a plethora of plastic people were available? There are gold mannequins, white mannequins, flesh-toned mannequins, mannequins in strangely sexual positions, mannequins that don't require a seatbelt. Kyle thankfully had Faye to help her sort out the myriad options and to make sure they are buckled in properly -- and of course to help her create the perfect store. I'm excited to see how Kyle's shop turns out. Hopefully the mannequins are fierce enough to support her threads.

Speaking of fine human specimens, we move to dinner with a few real ones -- Brandi, Marisa, her brother, and Marisa's very handsome husband Dean. Marisa doesn't think Dean is as attractive as what she was looking for but she guesses he'll do. As it turns out, that comment might even be a dig at herself. You see Marissa and Dean might have a little of that "brother/sister" thing going on, and I have to agree. They do favor each other -- not in a creepy never kiss way, but in a "Oh I see it now that you say it way." But no matter, they are a very attractive couple. And Dean can rock layers like nobody’s business. Nice plaid shirt/hoodie/blazer combo Mr. Zanuck.

Over dinner Marisa and Brandi discuss an upcoming trip to Vegas. You see Brandi has been invited to teach a class on female empowerment through stripping, which is obviously the next wave of Gertrude Stein's dreams. And so when she heads to an art gallery show with the gals, she extends an invite even to Kyle. What could bring them together like "Brandi's Night School Out for Girls"? Kyle is feeling the love and says yes, while Taylor abstains. If this is anything like prior trips to Vegas with these gals, next week should be a real delight. Though it is upsetting to know that Taylor won't be on hand to teach everyone how to eat cotton candy.

Is This Happiness?
The best of part of this gallery show perhaps wasn't the art (though it was amazing), but seeing Darling Ken spending some time with the tallest ladies of Beverly Hills. I'm glad that his moment with his hand in the cookie jar was captured both by the Bravo cameras and by Yolanda's cell phone. Also, I hope Yolanda always says "put your boobies in his face" instead of "say cheese" when she is taking a picture.

We also got to see a visit from Ms. Paris Hilton who Kyle admonishes for not keeping her as in the know as TMZ. I have the same problem with my niece (she's six and very precocious).

But after Ken's moment of zen among the models, he has a bit of an awkward run-in with Mauricio. Mauricio is trying to mend fences with gin, but he and Lisa are on the way out to dinner. Even with them being on the run, it seems like things were a touch tense between the gang. Mauricio even remarks how odd it all was. I don't like all this simmering tension. It worries me for what's to come.

Thankfully things look to be all vagina jokes and stripper poles in Vegas next week, so we have that to anticipate. What did you think of this week kiddos? Should Ken have been more gracious with that gin? Do you think Kim should close that ghost portal? Leave it in the comments.

Brandi: I'm Always Here For You, Kim

Brandi focuses on the positive this week as this season's RHOBH comes to an end.

Hey Bravo Fans,

Today was a fabulous day--t was my baby Jake’s birthday. We got his favorite Oreo ice cream cake, and for our family celebration, it was perfection. I can’t believe he’s already eight. I had to hold back my tears when I realized I will never again use that number eight candle. #mommymoment

It has been a really exciting week for me. My Sonoma County chardonnay, Unfiltered Blonde, launched for pre-sales this week, and despite it being tax season, the first day alone was a huge success. Thank you! The website is up now at www.unfilteredblonde.com. The creation of the wine was an incredibly long and careful process, and I couldn’t be happier or more proud of my finished product. I’m sure you're all as excited as me that this week was the FINALE episode of BATSH-- crazy RHOBH reunion. 

I could talk about the she said, she said, she said… but let’s not and pretend we did. It’s been a long season, kind of centering on one night that really isn’t worth the attention it was given. I’m tired of it, it happened several months ago, I’m sure you’re tired of it. You know why? Because it’s old news and in the PAST! 

Eileen, your house is lovely. Sorry I said otherwise for the sake of a laugh. I really like Vincent, he is super cool, your little boy is adorable, you seem like a good stepmom, and I wish you and your family the very best.

Lisa R., I really loved you on my podcast. You made me laugh and rolled with punches. I really enjoyed our interview, and I enjoyed most of the season with you. I think that’s what I’m going to take away and forget about the rest. I think sometimes you make it harder on yourself with your Twitter feed, but I’m choosing not to engage. I really liked a side of you, and you seem to have a beautiful family.

Lisa V., I had a lot of fun with you and Ken. I will always have a special place in my heart for you guys. I wish Ken the best of health and a speedy recovery. 

Kyle, best wishes on you and your family’s endeavors. My sincerest wish is that you and Kim could be as close as you ever were in the near future.

You are a strong chica and I know your family is better for it. 

Brandi Glanville

Kim, love having you as a BFF. I’m always here for you, and I hope you are always here for me. You are a strong chica, and I know your family is better for it. You are hilarious, and I love our funny talks and text-offs. Laughter is the best medicine. I heart you.

Yo, my dear, dear Yo, I will see you soon. I love you, you are so strong and so brave! I know you are going to kick Lyme disease’s ass! Anything you need, just emoji me.

I want to thank all my supporters for always being there for me regarding all of my other endeavors, including my books, podcast, Celebrity Apprentice, app, my t-shirts, and finally my WINE and for allowing me to be me.

Ok guys, this is the big week. This is the Make*A*Wish Los Angeles Walk for Wishes Walkathon. Me and the boys pledged to try to raise $15,000--I have $12,625 so far. We need $2,375 by Friday at midnight, every dollar counts. Thank you!

I heart you all!

Xoxo

B

P.S.  Here’s my Make*A*Wish YouTube video that I made in my kitchen. youtu.be/DTKMTDs6-R4 

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