Cast Blog: #RHOBH

No More Peace

Ep 10:'s Editor doesn't hold a grudge against Mauricio, Mohammed, or the mannequins.

Well Beverly Hills fans. In case I've offended you, I've gone ahead and gotten a nice bottle of gin. You don't want it. Well, call me Mauricio then. Just kidding. Let's try and recap shall we.

The Call
We open back at the restaurant with Mauricio continuing to maintain that the entire debacle could be stopped with a well-placed phone call. As Brandi and Mauricio get increasingly heated, Kyle steps in and tells Mauricio to stop. And then everyone else jumps in. . .

Ken jumps in to tell Mauricio he never listens and to defend Brandi. Taylor jumps in to say she's been through much more than everyone else involved. Yolanda jumps in to say she’s talking nonsense.

This fight is like some sort of tumbleweed that just collects everyone as it rolls along. The string ball just gets bigger and bigger. If they sit there long enough the waiters are going to start giving their legal opinions on the matter.

After a semi-calming moment in the bathroom and an amazing moment where Kim and Mauricio actually agree, people manage to finally close up shop. Brandi and Mauricio even have a moment where they almost make up, until Ken calls Mauricio a typical man. Ken hates to go against his buddy, but the thinks Mauricio was out of line. And suddenly the drama knows no gender boundaries. To the Polo Lounge for restorative cocktails everyone!Later, the subject of all that hoopla reappears: Adrienne and Paul drop by the Richards-Umanksy abode for a light meal. The gang discusses the big fight for the first time, and Kyle feels like the lady in the middle as she's still friendly with Brandi. Hopefully everyone can get this sorted before the next real estate open house or Moroccan themed dinner they attend. It'd be terrible to make this a trend. 

Yo: The Domestic Diva
Next we see Yolanda in her natural element -– making someone's home as fabulous as her own. Her ex Mohammed has employed her to decorate one of his immaculately designed homes. And so Yolanda teaches several people English and brings along her best lemons to make sure all is well. And Mohammed loves it.

And how couldn't he? The house is INSANE. Seriously, why does Mohammed only make the most ridiculous, lady-olive filled homes on Earth? Who cares if he's a bit of a task master about slouching. I'd surely allow him to fuss at me about my posture if I could be his child and live in his home.

The Psychic Friends Network
Kim Richards sees dead people, or at least she thinks she does. And thus she's invited her trusty psychic Rebecca to check and see if she's feeling things properly. And turns out her spidey senses are correct. Rebecca believes Kim's grandkids (and someone who isn't her mom) are always watching over her.

Frankly, with things going with the ladies as they are at the moment, the more people looking after Kim the better. Besides actual spirits hanging out, Kim has also seen a heart-bedecked vortex. Yes what you or I would call a fireplace is actually a portal into another dimension. And the door is open, nothing she can do about that now.

Let's just talk for a second about the array of plastic people in the world. Did you know that such a plethora of plastic people were available? There are gold mannequins, white mannequins, flesh-toned mannequins, mannequins in strangely sexual positions, mannequins that don't require a seatbelt. Kyle thankfully had Faye to help her sort out the myriad options and to make sure they are buckled in properly -- and of course to help her create the perfect store. I'm excited to see how Kyle's shop turns out. Hopefully the mannequins are fierce enough to support her threads.

Speaking of fine human specimens, we move to dinner with a few real ones -- Brandi, Marisa, her brother, and Marisa's very handsome husband Dean. Marisa doesn't think Dean is as attractive as what she was looking for but she guesses he'll do. As it turns out, that comment might even be a dig at herself. You see Marissa and Dean might have a little of that "brother/sister" thing going on, and I have to agree. They do favor each other -- not in a creepy never kiss way, but in a "Oh I see it now that you say it way." But no matter, they are a very attractive couple. And Dean can rock layers like nobody’s business. Nice plaid shirt/hoodie/blazer combo Mr. Zanuck.

Over dinner Marisa and Brandi discuss an upcoming trip to Vegas. You see Brandi has been invited to teach a class on female empowerment through stripping, which is obviously the next wave of Gertrude Stein's dreams. And so when she heads to an art gallery show with the gals, she extends an invite even to Kyle. What could bring them together like "Brandi's Night School Out for Girls"? Kyle is feeling the love and says yes, while Taylor abstains. If this is anything like prior trips to Vegas with these gals, next week should be a real delight. Though it is upsetting to know that Taylor won't be on hand to teach everyone how to eat cotton candy.

Is This Happiness?
The best of part of this gallery show perhaps wasn't the art (though it was amazing), but seeing Darling Ken spending some time with the tallest ladies of Beverly Hills. I'm glad that his moment with his hand in the cookie jar was captured both by the Bravo cameras and by Yolanda's cell phone. Also, I hope Yolanda always says "put your boobies in his face" instead of "say cheese" when she is taking a picture.

We also got to see a visit from Ms. Paris Hilton who Kyle admonishes for not keeping her as in the know as TMZ. I have the same problem with my niece (she's six and very precocious).

But after Ken's moment of zen among the models, he has a bit of an awkward run-in with Mauricio. Mauricio is trying to mend fences with gin, but he and Lisa are on the way out to dinner. Even with them being on the run, it seems like things were a touch tense between the gang. Mauricio even remarks how odd it all was. I don't like all this simmering tension. It worries me for what's to come.

Thankfully things look to be all vagina jokes and stripper poles in Vegas next week, so we have that to anticipate. What did you think of this week kiddos? Should Ken have been more gracious with that gin? Do you think Kim should close that ghost portal? Leave it in the comments.

Lisa V.: How Many Scenarios Can We Excuse?

Lisa Vanderpump tries to make sense of what happened at the reunion and gives us an update on her life since. 

And here we have it...the final episode as the curtain drops on Season 5, the last part of this intriguing trilogy...

Firstly, it is almost too complicated to dissect, but let's try to have a better understanding of the complicated dynamic that materialized this season...

I think upon reflection, it has been pretty obvious after months of filming the intent of some to insert themselves into an already fractious situation. Kim obviously felt bolstered by BG, much to her detriment, as she became a victim of her own volatility. I doubt since filming has wrapped whether there has been much interaction between BG and Kim. It would surprise me greatly if this supposedly close relationship is still flourishing.

What concerned me this season was the manipulative attempt by BG to undermine Kyle and to validate any negativity that Kim was feeling.

Lisa Vanderpump

There's not a lot to say that hasn't been said, really, but what concerned me this season was the manipulative attempt by BG to undermine Kyle and to validate any negativity that Kim was feeling, salaciously stating what a wonderful friend she was and how totally unsupportive Kyle has been. I don't believe the years of dealing with a sibling struggling with alcoholism, supporting financially when needed, should be ignored--also the emotional toll it must have taken on the family. This is a family that has many offsprings who love each other dearly, and that should be paramount. BG has no idea of any history, just a few short months under the glare of reality television.

Also in this final segment, it baffles me once again as to the arrogance as to state what is off limits. How many scenarios can we excuse? Dogs? Children? House? Sobriety? Our business became your business when we entered into your living room. We should strive for transparency, and we should deal with consequences as we profit from the benefits.

I have grown close to Lisa and Eileen and enjoyed them immensely, not always understanding Lisa's actions, but always believing it came from a place of concern, even if sometimes, like in regard to the text she sent, it was a little impulsive. Her anger got the better of her, and for that, I believe she was sorry. I am not making excuses for her, but I am resolute in the belief that provocation sometimes creates a day of reckoning.

My suggestion of putting a band aid on a situation is one of experience. Sometimes we reach for the unreachable, especially when it comes to relationships. Furthermore, we have to accept that idyllic relationships are not always obtainable, but what we should not accept is that the whole family infrastructure, which can be so delicate, would possibly be fractured--weddings missed, birthdays ignored, and all of life's moments punctuated, documented with regret.

So that is what I hope for this season, that the devious trifling is never rewarded by the success in the breakdown of any relationship. Last year, as I sat on my own, aghast at what had transpired, I hoped for a clearer picture, and now I have one, as I think you all do.

Snippets of downtime that have been aired this reunion--cups of tea requests, diarrhea jokes, pussy to the bathroom jokes, didn't know a Flex but definitely knew a Ford--are a great way of also demonstrating that there are giggles in the face of adversity.

Lastly, I would like to say a huge thank you to all of you, who have sent messages of love and well wishes in what has proved to be a trying week. The surgery has been a reminder of how sometimes the indomitable support of those close to you is so valuable, and I appreciate it tremendously. My children by my side, friends, and family are the icing on the cake. Thank you to you all. Ken is doing much better and is well on the way to full recovery.

I have appreciated your comments and enjoyed interacting with you.

Much love as always, 


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