Cast Blog: #RHOBH

Wishing Brandi the Best

Taylor discusses the anger she was holding onto in Ojai and why Brandi's book deal bothered her.

Kim planned such a lovely getaway for the girls and it made me sad to see her upset during the first dinner outing for the group. Last year when Brandi incorrectly accused her of doing crystal meth, it really hurt Kim and her family deeply. It was a big step for Kim to leave her comfort zone and go away with us and I didn't want her to shed a single tear. Perhaps this will be a turning point for their relationship having had the chance to discuss the past. I am not sure if Adrienne announcing to the group that Kim was crying was her way of alerting everyone that Kim may need protecting again or if it was more about her issues with Brandi. Either way, it set off as Lisa called it "shut the f--- up gate." There is some serious underlying tension between Adrienne and Brandi and we haven't seen the last of that.

As for tension, I am still holding a great deal of resentment for Brandi's comments in the reunion last year regarding my writing a book. She did not know my family nor was she around through the previous years as the other ladies were. Therefore, I didn't think it was her place to pass judgment. Her announcing her book deal only brought up the memory of her comments to me and opened a wound I was hoping we could close this year. I want success for all the people in my life and I wish her the same with her book.

Going through the last year, I have had a myriad of emotions. I have experienced feelings I would have never expected possible. Anger was one of those emotions. I found myself angry and easily agitated. I wasn't angry with anyone or anything in particular. This emotion was the most difficult to deal with of all I experienced because it made me feel like a completely different person and I was terribly unhappy. Watching moments where I see that in myself makes me sad and regretful.

On a lighter note. . .my favorite moments with the ladies are always when we are having fun, laughing, and enjoying one another. Watching us racing across the golf course in golf carts brought a smile to my face. This was the first day I saw a glimpse of a fun side to Yolanda and that was a pleasant surprise. Watching the girls play badminton was so fun. This is not a sport we play in Beverly Hills. . .clearly. Mud slinging at the spa and then. . .Drunk-nastics! Anything more I need to say???

Lets just leave it at that. We all needed that kind of fun. Love my gal pals.

Lets keep enjoying this life because trust me. . .it's too short.

Kisses for now from the BH.

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