Hola Mis Amores, first of all, thank you all for your sweet messages and for sending me so much love when you found out about my father's passing.
This episode was very bittersweet to watch. It's hard to go back in time and relive the grief. But I was happy you could all see a piece of my lindo, Puerto Rico, and see my mommy.
Back then I debated wheter to go along with the trip. There are many many days and hours of filming that are compressed into the 45 minutes you all see.
The reality is I was able to grieve with my family and I was able to see my father before he passed away. His last words to me were "Soy feliz" ("I'm happy"). I know he was ready, and he is in a much better place than all of us right now. I believe he is in heaven watching from above and taking care of me. As difficult as it was, I remained strong. My father hated pity parties, and I think I get that from him. I am a cry baby (I cry even during commercials), but I don't like to use other people to try to victimize myself. That is why I went along with the trip -- as I didn't want to uninvite the girls. Many have asked me why I chose to uninvite Carlton. . .The truth it wasn't up to just me -- and she was never invited.
At the airport I told the ladies I didn't want them to be sad for me and I wanted them to enjoy my beautiful island. I brought them a gift. Even though Yolanda has said on multiple occasions that I give too many gifts, it's in my culture to bring something when you go to someone's home. They were going to my home, but I wanted to give them a little something to start their trip on good note.
They say there is no place like home and I agree 100 percent. To me Puerto Rico is the most mesmerizing place in the world. Our island is beautiful, but what really makes it special is our people. Everyone is so welcoming and loving. Everyone wants to have a good time. And everyone loves life. I grew up very humble, but in PR there are no class divisions. We are brought up to feel equal, which is something I absolutely love.
My parents divorced when I was very young. I love both my parents, but I grew up with my mother so I am extremely close to her. She is my hero and my inspiration. I honestly DO NOT know what I would do if I didn't have her. She is such a strong woman that instilled in me the values I have. She made me the woman I am today. I will forever be thankful to God for having the honor of calling her my mother.
You also heard a bit of the cultural shock my husband went through when I took him to PR for the first time. You met my beautiful cousins Deliris and Marybel and my gorgeous niece Sofia. But that is a very small part of my family. Our family gatherings are usually about 100 people. The best thing to compare it to is Salma Hayek's character in the movie Fools Rush In -- one big, loud and happy family.
I was spending the day with my family so I organized a trip to Palominito for the girls. It's a beautiful private island from the Conquistador Hotel. I thought they would have a great time. Since I wasn't there, I can only comment on what I've seen on the episode and what I now know transpired.
I feel like Yolanda was waiting to attack Lisa, which makes me think she and Brandi are the ring leaders of the coup against Lisa. The very first time I had a one-on-one with Yolanda she did not speak highly about Lisa. She told me I shouldn't be afraid of her and I needed to talk about how rude she had been at Carlton's luncheon. I SO wish you all could've seen that one-on-one lunch with Yolanda, as that set a tone for me. I saw how both Yolanda and Brandi were super nice to Lisa's face and that they were supposedly BFFs -- yet they both talked crap about her to me (the new girl). THAT'S A HOLLYWOOD FRIEND TO ME!
I always believe that real friends are not the ones who have to talk 10 times a day to prove each other they are friends. Real friends are those who you might not talk to in a while, but when you need them, you call them and you pick up right where you left things. Real friends are the ones who have your back and don't doubt your friendship to create drama or to stay relevant.
Yolanda with her whole "Hollywood friendship" and Brandi with her whole jealousy about the fact that Lisa and Kyle were getting closer was quite pathetic.
I wish I would've seen what happened at the beach because back then I thought Lisa owed Kyle and Mauricio an answer to their question about the tabloids. But they did give them an answer at the beach so I can now understand their frustration when all the others were ganging up on them at the dinner table.
My 2 cents in this whole tabloid drama is. . .Why now? Why would Brandi bring it up now? After all she is the one who started talking about the tabloids at out first luncheon. Why blame it now on Lisa just because she is jealous? Why bring back the Scheana issue when I remember seeing her and Scheana hugging it out after meeting and discussing the whole infidelity incident over a lunch.
Anyhow. . .after watching this heavily dramatic episode, all I can say is I wish I knew back then what I know now.
Until next time.